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« John Fades to Black | Main | The Day's Dumbest Dialogue »

October 22, 2007

No Week in Review for You, GH

I came up with a whole bunch of reasons that I am protesting GH via not doing Week in Reviews until further notice.  Reasons included:

  • Robin and Patrick have been having the same argument since 1989
  • Lulu, whom I used to adore, is increasingly horrible
  • Steve Burton's hair is giving me seizures
  • I hate basically every character on the show, except Christina, Cameron, and maybe Jake
  • Robin saying Carly had no right to object to Robin asking Carly's husband for sperm had me siding with Carly in an argument.  CARLY.  Over Robin.  I fear thinking Sonny is just a good guy trying to take care of his family is next on my list.
  • they keep bringing on more characters that they don't know how to write for instead of focusing on the 179 they already have on the canvas
  • the showrunners' idea of what this show needed for sweeps was apparently "more mob action," which is like the worst "fix" I can think of since Britney got those heinous extensions after she shaved her head (at least Brit has the excuse of being wasted out of her gourd)
  • Diane and Max almost had sex.  DIANE AND MAX.  Vom.
  • even Liz's hair, a bright spot I could always turn to, is f'ed up now

But mostly, here's what it comes down to:  I can hardly sit through a week's worth of episodes of this show, let alone devote the time and energy necessary to do a Week in Review, when it is SO BORING and so clearly committed to sucking.  So, not that I think you all were sitting around waiting with bated breath for my take on a week's worth of this snoozefest of a soap, but if you were even a little curious, there you go. 


Are you kidding? Serial Drama is the only good thing GH has going for it. I look forward to you & Mallory more than to the damn show. This post, by the way: perfect.

I second Aydee. I think your columns are one of the main reasons I still watch.

There was at least one highlight today, though. Zacharah (a.k.a. Faux-Alcazar III) gave voice to my thoughts when he said, "Screw Port Charles!"

Becca, I do not for a second blame you. I haven't watched that crap-fest in about 3 weeks; I figure if things improve I'll read about it here first. I love your columns, but don't torture yourselves watching that show just for our sakes!

I've been reading your commentary for just a few months now and I just want to say I LOVE YOU GUYS (this is what my husband's best friend says when he's been drinking, but it applies here even without the alcohol).

I have been avoiding GH like Jason has been avoiding scissors and Liz has been avoiding telling about Jake and Sam has been avoiding her GED. Which means, there's not so much action on my part.

Seriously, ANOTHER Mob War? What a surprise. And Lulu and Carly are too loud and even a good hair day can't make them any less annoying.

Robin needs to open a new account at her bank that doesn't have penalties for early withdrawals.

Patrick needs to stop wearing that vest (maybe he thinks it drops his sperm count, who knows?) And I need to go clean my toilet.

Thanks for your highly entertaining and funny takes on GH, or as I call it "General Ha".

Well, I know I am steadfastly boycotting GH. Sure, it probably helps that I've never actually seen the show, but let's not be picky.

But I always read what you write about the show, because you two rock.

LOL about Steve Burtons hair. In one of the episodes this week I recall looking at the screen mesmerized thinking "that man's head is getting bigger and bigger." His head is on steroids I tell you.

BTW what the hell have they done to Alexis?

I wanted to give you a wee bit of exciting to focus on - My friends and I did the LA Aids walk this weekend - and happened to run into JT/KMC as we were walking

during the course of the walk - my friends and I got to hear him hotly say

"fuck, and douche bag" (can't say what he was talking about - we didn't stalk, of course :))

Something about Jason Thompson and dirty words...he defines hotly - and we immediately thought of you

Never fear...this week's already better than last week because of my new favorite quote "screw Port Charles, there's a frost coming". Seriously, awesome writer totally snuck out of the vault and penned that little gem!

NOOO!!!! Your posts are even better when GH sucks, don't you get that? :) Funny and snarky! What about Cameron's future "bitch please" moments?

I've been boycotting for a couple months now so I can't say I blame you in the least. This show's commitment to suckiness is without a doubt it's strongest commitment.

From the couple of recaps I read, I have to say I totally agree with your mini, bullet-pointed list. Never in my entire life could I have imagined I would side with Carly over Robin on anything. Ever. Yet through sheer suckitude Guza has made it happen. My world is suddenly dark and very cold, as if all the light and warmth has left me.

You pretty much summed up why GH is no longer viewer-worthy. Fantastic points! As always, you struck gold with your commentary.

I will miss your reviews. It was my weekly highlight after sitting through the shows.

I am hoping for better things in the future for GH. I, sadly, will still watch until the Black and White ball, just to see if they do any justice whatsoever to Agatha Christie's, "And Then There Were None." I know, I know... leaving Guza alone with a great literary work is a scary thing. I was so hoping you would review it, so that I would have something to laugh about. *heh*

Perhaps you could have a margarita night and watch the shows on TiVo?

I wonder if every character on the show, and every couple has purposely been destroyed, just so we won't miss them after they kill them all off and start from scratch. And then there were none - nada. No more characters to love and look forward to watching interact, because they were all destroyed by Guza.

I only came by to read your weekly GH reviews, so I might not pop in as often. I hope you all the best.

Anyway, good night, and good luck.


I am so glad for you to have found the ffwd button. I hope your button does not end up like mine, faded from all the use of "catching up" with GH.

The only best part of last week's show, was when Robin mentioned to Lucky about the great times their parents had together and how great it would be to have a Scorpio-Spencer baby. But seeing how the show is going, the kid (if it ever exists) may end up mobular. YIKES. I'd better stop. Too many ideas for writers.

I can deal with GH being so bad there's no reason to watch it anymore, but so bad that even Becca can't stand to watch and comment? Beyond the pale. I guess we can pray that Guza et al hit the picket line with the rest of the WGA, but that could mean that Frons ends up personally penning all the ABC soaps... frying pan, meet fire. Anyway, how about pretending it's 1979 and doing commentary from that angle?

I could barely sit through the marathon on Soapnet this weekend, although it was worth it to see Carly rip Robin a new one. Although I was kind of hoping that Lucky would offer to father Robin's child since then he would have at least one child that was his. And why is every man in this town in love with Lulu? Even Cooper, who was supposed to be in love with Maxie, spends more time mooning over her. I have to say though I loved the scenes with Max and Diane.

This saddens me: I actually stopped watching GH over the summer, and have been using your recaps and coverage as a nicorette-style patch to ease the pain of withdrawls. Now I'm bereft.

I don't blame you. i tried watching again after another short break (two months) still horrible. I'm actually watching all my children and days and cringe less from that than general hospital. i agree with V they will probably start killing all 179 characters on the canvas except for the fab four and force us to watch an all mob all the time with limited interruptions GH. Wouldn't that be fun. I once rated this show exciting until this past what year or so. they should of cancelled gh instead aw (another world) all those years ago.

you know, the degree of suck that GH has sunk to has aggravated my carpal tunnel syndrome. like a fool, i tune in hoping that something will actually happen in this episode besides the word "crazy" being thrown around in reference to various characters, and i'm always disappointed. which in turn results in me flipping channels back and forth for 60 straight minutes. my hand is now permanently deformed and i'm typing this with my nose.

and thank you Elizabeth M. for bringing up the point that EVERYFRIGGINGUY on GH is in love with lulu. why? why? why? she makes me cringe every time she's on the screen. she has to be the most poorly written of all the female characters on the show. at least carly's loud and stupid. lulu's just stupid.

I can't even blame you. The big, scary mob element that was supposed to fill in the space left by Alcazar is a big joke. The lead up to sweeps is lame beyond words.

Lulu is turning into a weird acting shrew. LL3's story, which already needed some work, is just being ruined with the inclusion of a BSC loon aka "Here's Johnny."

Liz is still getting on my nerves, and Steve Burton looks like a damn fairy with his feathered, yet molded in place, hair.

I can't take it either, so why should you?

Can't say I blame you for not wanting to waste your time with the show. Reading your list of reasons - I found myself agreeing with every point. It was like you read my thoughts as I watched the show this week! The only thing I've really enjoyed was Luke coming back - but since they'll probably just give him a zero storyline to fill the time til Tony's next vacation I'm not sure even he makes it worth watching any more.

Maybe if the writers strike, ABC will show re-runs of GH and we can all watch something that is actually good!

There was a tiny moment of entertainment on GH last week. Since Carly is a beloved mob moll she never has to face any consequences for her actions, including kidnapping her dead best freinds child and going against her wishes AND hooking up with the dead best friend's husband all seconds after her demise. RIP Courtney!

Nikolas, in his not Cassidine vengeance but probably a tumor or malformation like Manny's (yawn), decided it was time for Carly to pay for kidnapping his Son. He almost slashed her throat with a letter opener. How very Helena, and all things Helena are entertaining. Now I am not a fan of violence per se, but this had a reason behind it and I love to see that ho squirm!!!!!

Good news is that he goes after Sam this week. Yipeee!!! She gets the Katherine Bell treatment and he dangles her off the parapet!!!!

Sadly he doesn't follow through and actually kill any of these dreadful characters.

Now if he could knock off Sonny "mumbles ain't as crazy as Zacharra" I'd send Nikolas flowers.

NO! That weird Robin lookalike is back! Why didn't they leave her on the NS? Wait. WHAT JUST HAPPENED?

Dont blame you don't blame you don't blame you. The whole idea of a Spencer-Scorpio baby is fabulous..but sadly since this is an EMMY BAIT story...it means Lucky will be no where near it....

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