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« The Decade's Most Accurate Dialogue? | Main | Dude, Where'd They Go? »

November 19, 2007

So Many Questions

Y&R is horrifically boring these days. It's not even that it's bad, exactly, (Although I'm not going to try and claim that the show is anything approaching entertaining), it's just...like, I care about the following:

  • Jack
  • Jack and Sharon's marriage
  • Jack and Sharon finally deciding to ship Noah off to boarding school
  • [This is the spot where I'd put in writing my silly pipe dream of Gloria being outed as the guilty party in the Jabot cream scandal, but I know that's as likely as, like...Victor not being an asshole for two consecutive minutes]

Everything else is either terrible or so jaw-droppingly boring that my poor, fragile self can't even handle it, and it causes my mind to wander...

1. Did the ousted Simone on Project Runway remind anybody else of Amelia Heinle?


Probably just me...

She's not an actress and was only on the show for 48 minutes, during which she displayed no personality or talent, but I still think she'd be a better Victoria than Amelia Heinle is.

(Okay, that was mean. I'm sorry, Amelia! Congratulations on your baby!)

2. How much does Melody Thomas Scott rule? She's the only person in this inane "Let's all talk to a comatose woman just because...well, it's slightly more engaging than when you talked to her when she was awake" story who is putting in any effort. Eric Braeden is obviously thinking about what to order for lunch, and Joshua Morrow is like, "Which Guitar Hero is better, II or III? I like both, but I still have a soft spot for I" and MTS is just going all out and really committing to being heartbroken and shell shocked. And her wardrobe totally reflects someone who has been at the hospital for eons.


3. How lame are these made-up memories? I call shenanigans!

Nick: You know, I keep expecting you to... sit up and say "gotcha". You remember when we were kids and, uh... we used to fight over that video game--starship? I remember that first time I ever beat you, you got so mad at me you pushed me. And then I pushed you back. And you fell down and you just laid there, lifeless. It didn't even look like you were breathing. It freaked me out. Well, now everybody's freaking out, sis. You see, the crazy thing is, is in the past, if I had a problem, I'd come to you. You'd always help me through it. You'd put things in perspective. You'd always remind me how much smarter you are than me.

Nicholas and Victoria had no childhood memories because they were aged from three to eighteen in a nanosecond! I know that soaps can't really allude to the SORAS phenomenon, but can't we just truly ignore it and not write dumb faux memories?

4. Why on earth would Lily want to invite Sharon to their Thanksgiving dinner? Not that I don't like Sharon, but...she has her own family to celebrate and it didn't seem like Lily was extending the invitation to them as well. Although I can't fault her for not wanting Noah there...

5. Why are they pushing Karen and Neil so hard? Dru was only presumed dead a few months ago, they only met a little bit after that and--this is important--watching the two of them together is like watching televised bowling.

6. How disturbing is it that I was legitimately entertained by Gloria's scheme to get Jeffrey out of town? I hate all things Gloria related and yet I loved her ideas:

  • Get Jeff a job at Jabot in Hong Kong office
  • Frame Jeff for a crime
  • Telling him he's won a contest and sending him on a cruise around the world

That's gold, Jerry! Gold!

7. How love-starved is Nikki after being married to Victor for so long? Her fawning when David Chow gave her lavender and orange aromatherapy cream was embarrassing and yet kind of heart breaking. But mostly embarrassing.

8. Who on earth thought that re-airing the Clear Springs brouhaha on Black Friday would be a good idea? Isn't there a point in time when you should just admit that you royally fucked up and presented a week of television so horrible that it made me, a dedicated viewer of The Hills, cringe? And at that point in time, shouldn't you just put that footage away for, like, ever? Isn't it humiliating enough that it's all over YouTube? And isn't it cruel and unusual to make people relive it?


I normally take my lunch break at 12:30 so that I can be that girl in the office who eats her yogurt whilst watching Y&R but due to a number of tragic circumstances related to the unbearable stupidity of others, I wound up not getting to do so until 1:30 and I just caught the tail end of today's episode before The Bold and the Beautiful. I'm not exactly sure what to think of B&B--it's incredibly campy, but I think it's supposed to be that way. And it has a sense of fun that makes me almost able to overlook the fact that it's a breeding ground for actors and actresses who have plasticized their faces to the extreme. Plus, Heather Tom! And Jennifer Gareis who, for the first time in recorded history, didn't make me want to throw things at her. And I gather, from reading recaps, that someone, due to tomfoolery with eggs and petri dishes, gave birth to her enemy's baby and it was so like Days of Our Lives Circa James E. Reilly that I almost cried, I felt so at home.

Also, you know, I have no idea what's going on and I will probably never watch it again, but it was quite an enjoyable half hour.


Trust me when I tell you that Bold and The Beautiful is a million times better than Y&R is these days. For real. And half of the fired Bell-trained staff now work for Bold and Beautiful, which makes you really want to support the show. Give it a chance.

Yes, please, I urge you to give B&B another chance. I actually rate it the best soap in Daytime right now. And even though it is fun and campy and not all Serious and Deep and Educational (like Y&R and GH *snort*), the campiness is rooted in some semblence of reality and not, you know, devil possession and Melaswen.

Plus, Susan Flannery, Jennifer Gareis, Lesli Kay, Winsor Harmon, Eileen Davidson, Heather Tom, William deVry, Patrick Duffy and John McCook are kicking serious butt right now (in the best possible way). I guess what I'm saying is that I love watching B&B because I don't have to "try." I can just relax and enjoy its pure, unadulterated soapiness.

Plus, it's not all plot. I actually really enjoy the character interactions best.

My admiration for Melody Thomas Scott knows no bounds. Not only is she putting her heart and soul into yet another possible death of a child (there have been so many!), but she is doing it sans makeup. She looks like a grieving mother, for God's sake!. I was actually surprised that during one crying scene her mascara ran. I didn't think she had any on.
You know, it's one thing for a 20-something to go without makeup, but for a woman of a certain age to bare it all for the storyline.... Wow is all I can say.

Did her eyebrows get their own stylist?

yaaaaaaawwwwnnnn! oh! excuse me! what were were talking about? y&rrrrr.........*snort* *cough* sorry about that! i must've nodded off again! i can't remember this show ever being this boring. every storyline is a dud even the gimmicks. i think it started with brad actually being george and nobody giving a damn. or was it gloria's fifth kill? or the return of sheila? or putting their most charismatic character behind bars for an uneventful prison stay (not even one shank fight!)with the town psycho.

no, this show's problem is that there aren't any abbotts left (except jack). the abbott FAMILY and their interactions with the newmans, the chancelors, and everyone else on the show made it interesting. bring back ashley. bring back tracy. raise john from the dead and "find" jack's long lost sons kemo and kyle. then the show will have more going for it than nikki and victor's umpteenth divorce, victoria's billionth miscarriage and joshua morrow running about in his skivvies. actually, i'm not complaining about that one ;)

Does anyone else really miss Dru?

Yes Danny. I definitely miss Dru, as played by Victoria Rowell. I couldn't imagine anyone else playing the role. She carried the show for the last year she was on.

But do the folks at CBS actually think Y&R is as good today as it was, say, even 2 years ago? I DVR the show, but haven't watched (except for the building collapse week) faithfully since March/April this year.

I'm with you Alice....total respect and props for Melody Thomas Scott for looking the way a REAL person would look when sitting at yet another vigil by a dying child's bedside...I know it's not what Erica Kane would do but Erica is Erica..she makes her own rules.

Back in the day when I watched Y&R religiously (back when Jack was Nick's stepfather, Paul Walker played Victoria's best friend....and every kid on the show but Little Phillip was SORASed...) I was nver a Nikki fan but this changes my mind just a smidge....but only a smidge.....

Oooh. Project Runway started?

Thanks for the recs on B&B, you guys! I think I may need to start watching it regularly, because it was quite entertaining.

Danny, I totally miss Victoria Rowell! I really feel she's an integral part of the show and I miss her hats. The Winters family is nothing without her.

ElementaryDays, Project Runway started last week and they are repeating the premiere tonight at 9 before the new episode at 10. It's predictably awesome and it brought back my hopes and dreams of Tim Gunn becoming my next door neighbor...

I thought the Project Runway person looked a lot like Eileen Davidson's Ashley Abbott--funny that we'd both think of Y&R actresses. Do we agree that one of the guys looks a lot like Ricky Gervais?

Cool. Thanks Mallory. I missed it, but Bravo reruns the shit out of their stuff. Love all things Tim Gunn...even when he's in a commercial with Jessica Simpson. I hope Veronica Webb doesn't do an appearance on the show.

On the Y&R topic...Nia Peeples has silky, shiny hair and awesome skin. And what is/was ever the appeal of Phyllis? Yeah, I don't really watch the show.

I've been watching the show in record time - every other scene for the past 2 weeks has been about boring Victoria - it is not entertaining because everyone with half a brain knows that Victoria won't die and I couldn't give two pins about her unborn child. Neil and Karen - ugh, how boring. Also, Phyllis and Jana in prison is frightfully boring, nothing eventful ever happens there. The only thing that has me watching is Gloria and her schemes, also, I'm really starting to warm up to Amber again, I hope she gets back with Cane.

I see this baby story line going the way of Clear Springs: there's a TON of talk about death, but no one will die.
And what's the plan with Victoria? Take her home and slap her upstairs for the 6-8 weeks that she's on maternity leave? Puhleeze. This show has gotten so bad since LML took over. I mean, when B&B starts looking BETTER than Y&R, you KNOW things are bad.

I so agree with everyone, what happened to Y&R?

Seriously, nothing is interesting anymore, I know I should be touch by Vicky' coma but I am not, the only one bearable in that story is MTS, she is great!

I think that Y&R became an insult to my intelligence the way they wrote it, like Phyllis appeal won so shortly, like we do not know that it takes years!

JT could not act himself out of a cereal box; it is quite painful to watch!

I just don’t know what is missing except nothing touches me!

What exactly is so great about B&B? Bringing in the lousy actress who played Grace on Y&R to play the exact same character masquerading as Donna Logan? Having Brooke raped just so she could exploit her rape to get a man? Wow, what a great message that sends. Hunter Tylo and Jack Wagner in an inane egg plot? Stephanie ruined beyond all repair? I watched B&B for years and the show has been unwatchable for some time now.

As for Y&R, I am sick of Sharon. Sharon Case has not given any performances beyond narcoleptic for a long time now, and her hair looks like crap.

BTW, I think the guy who plays JT has done a decent job in this story, he just doesn't have any material. He's certainly miles ahead of Eric Braeden, Josh Morrow, or Don Diamont.

I do enjoy some parts of Y&R. I usually enjoy any scenes with Lauren/Michael, Kevin, or Daniel.

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