The End Is Nigh

That's right, dear readers, I fear my ability to mercilessly mock GH may be drawing to a close.  Because, you see, I am writing this post to praise Steve Burton.  I still think that Jason, Hitman/Moral Center of Port Charles, is one of the most storyline-hoarding characters in soap history, and his status as romantic hero on GH is a lot of what is wrong with the show.  However, my affection for his portrayer is growing.

My reasons, as with all good reasons, are threefold.

1)  He has great follicular self-awareness.  From the 3/18 issue of Soap Opera Digest: 

I have a Curious George hairline.  So, it's truly like a Monchichi, where it goes right across and it really doesn't look good short, short, short.

Hee!  Bonus points for combined usage of Curious George

and Monchichi.

Both of which happen to be spot-on accurate:

You probably know how much effort I have put into chronicling the horrendousness of Mr. Burton's hair-don'ts in recent years, so it actually makes me feel giddy, not to mention less guilty, to know that he is fully aware of the wrongness of his coif. 

2)  He is not a slave to the soap-hunk stereotype.  Unlike virtually every other daytime actor, he admits it's hard work being a pin-up and also chooses not to do said work some of the time.  From the same SOD issue:

When summer is coming up, I usually start in April to shed the winter weight.  I love to eat, so I basically train all summer, get rid of the winter coat, get back in fighting shape and then, come the first week of football, I start eating anything and everything I want.  It's true.  You'll see on the show.  I get bigger in the winter and I get leaner in the summer.

I like this philosophy.  And I officially apologize for thinking his aversion to shirtless scenes was because of his religion.  (Although I would like to know if there is such a religion, because I would like a better excuse for refusing to appear in front of people in a bikini than "just because," and I have found that if people throw down the religion card, it is nearly impossible to trump.  Except in Footloose.  But come on, it was so obviously their time to dance!)

Anyway, back on topic, for the record, even with "the winter coat" I have never thought Steve Burton was fat.  What the hell goes on in Los Angeles, man?

3)  This video. (Warning, the audio is terrible.)  Reader Sharon sent me that link and while usually my reaction to soap fan events is much like Matthew McConaughey's to deodorant, I will make an exception in this case. Because, as you'll see, Steve Burton thinks GH is ridiculous too!  Now yes, it does appear he's trying quite hard to be funny, but he's pretty successful, so I'll give him a pass.  I especially love his digs at the awful special effects that his bosses inexplicably continue to pimp.  He also admits that basically all he does as Jason is stand around and blink, which is refreshingly candid.  (And not entirely accurate, as Jason has had some great moments with Jake, and Spinelli for that matter.  Plus, though it pained us to admit it, he was one of the best things about Night Shift.)

So there you go.  I know some of you were already disappointed that I don't hate Jason and Elizabeth together, so feel free to truly hate me now, but I stand by this opinion:  Abject assiness of his character aside, Steve Burton entertains me.

Screencap courtesy of Clarissa.

Comments

[Jett]

Does this make Jason & Liz: Jizchichi?

[Charlie]

It's nice to know that while the character he plays is one of the most hated around (sorry, but it's so true) at least the actor who plays him has his head on straight about certain things and that doesn't make him seem so bad.

[KLD]

All I can say is....

:(

Becca all i can say is you wound me

[Sarah]

He is SO sporting the Monchichi. Brilliant insight. When he was younger they gave him alot of highlights and did a whole Ceasar thing a la then ER George Clooney. It gave his "big still blinking" head more definition. He should try that again. Maybe spare Liz and Sam all those horrible highlights some.

eh...no matter. Steve may be funny and able to mock the foolishness of GH, but Jason and any Jason woman still remains really unbearably awful.

okay fine the curious george monchichi is really funny!

[Cate]

'Geez Jason get a life!'

after watching that video I kinda understand Guza's sick obsession with Steve. He's hysterical...maybe he should start writing for GH.

but i still think jason and liz are the most boring and most annoying soap couple ever

[smirks]

Oh no. Soon you'll be drinking overpriced acai berry juice too.

[Vicki]

I've actually written to Steve Burton *ducks* twice, and both times I got a postcard with "God Bless" written on the back. I'd read in one of those soap mags that he's a Christian, and that impressed me, given what his character does. But I still want to know if he gets headaches from scowling all the time.

[Marianne]

I must concur w/Becca on Steve-though I still loathe and despise Jason (except NSJason, but that's only b/c NSPatrick was so entirely loathesome that he made NSJason, a MOB HITMAN GIVEN COMMUNITY SERVICE AS THE JANITORWHOCANDOANYTHING, seem a preferable alternative by comparison-another reason why NS was evil and must NEVER, EVER, EVER be repeated). Besides, he and MumblestheMidgetMobster got myKimberly back to play myRobin, so I can't hate them completely. But I CAN, and will continue to, LOATHE AND DESPISE Jason and Sonny and all that they represent and all that they have done to my show through the pen of Guza-and I will continue to mock them mercilessly.

[Cece]

I totally agree that soap fan events, by definition, suck. But Steve Burton's are actually good becuase of the amount of self-deprication. He doesn't take himself too seriously. It's fabulous.

However, I LOVE Jason and Elizabeth. They really are the one reason I watch GH. They've killed off Emily and Georgie, who were the only reasons I watched the show. So now, I live for my Jason/Liz lovefests.

I do agree with some commenters that sometimes they can be extremely boring. But most of the time, their on-screen time allows for a gentler, sweeter Jason that I can't get enough of.

Sure he kills people for a living, but with Elizabeth, that's not all there is to him.

Let the insults fly ...

[Beth]

I proudly wear the "Hate Jason with a white-hot passion, but dig all over Steve Burton" button. I think the guy's hysterical and he takes absolutely none of it seriously. He's even been known at past PAs to say that even he thinks Jason should get less airtime. I'm *gulp* even going to see him in NY with Natalia L. next month, and I'm really looking forward to it.

So I say, let your freak "I heart Steve Burton" flag fly, Becca!

[Vicki]

But, should a daytime actor really take that stuff seriously in the first place?

[Mardou]

Steve Burton amuses me, especially with Bradford Anderson. I would love to go to a PA with the both of them, and I am not really the PA type.

Jason on the other hand needs to SUFFER. And then lose. And then suffer some more. Then I might like him again.

[Amy B]

I so need to go to a PA with these guys. WHERE is my I Heart Steve Burton and his Monchici head t-shirt? I love that guy. I am completely in support of the winter bulk up / summer slim down plan. Why is that so easy for men and so hard for women? Unfair. But a more important question is does this mean as spring is sprung can we look forward to some SB shirtless scenes? Please? Some of us appreciate the more bulky, broad guy manliness rather than only getting the Jason Thompson long and lean hotness.
For years I have thought Steve Burton was hysterical and have loved Jason inspite of his brain damaged homicidal tendencies. Here's an idea!....monster.com
Tell Sonny to go to hell and quit killing people for him. Radical concept, I know but hey it just might work!

[KS]

I wish this was an April Fool's joke. Steve Burton's GH bashing is a front. Yeah, he jokes about how Jason stands around and blinks but you know he has a hissy fit if the writers try to give Jason layers. Burton's the reason Jason didn't get his Q memories back during the memory loss storyline. That was the original plan but he shot it down because he likes Jason to be dull as dirt with no memory. And, I honestly don't understand how a soap fan can support an actor's decision to be out of shape and refuse to play love scenes. That's just unprofessional.