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« I Think I Have Outrage Fatigue | Main | All My Children: 2008 In Review »

December 30, 2008

Serial Drama's Best and Worst of 2008

We are two girls who love lists.  We have been known to make up projects just so we can create to-do lists and check off each item.  It's so satisfying!  And if you can also incorporate color-coding?  Consider us blissful.

So why, then, did we not jump for joy at the thought of doing this year's list of best and worst happenings on our shows?  Well, it probably has to do with the fact that the number of soapy happenings entitled to "best" status in 2008 is roughly equal to the number of world capitals that Britney Spears can name off the top of her head.  It was, overall, a dreary year in our corner of soapland, with the notable exception of Night Shift.  If we're talking about all soaps, even those lucky enough not to have us as viewers, apparently on One Life to Live troubles melt like lemon drops and birds fly over the rainbow (except when gang rapists secretly romance their amnesiac victims!).  But since we don't watch that show, we can refuse to acknowledge its goodness and maintain our general tenor of bitchy dissatisfaction.  It works for us.

We did work up the stamina to compile a list of bests and worsts, but we feel compelled to issue our usual disclaimer:  We only watch All My Children, Days of Our Lives, General Hospital, Night Shift, and The Young and the Restless.  So yes, there was that whole bear thing on The Bold and the Beautiful, As the World Turns is probably super progressive with the Noah/Luke couple, One Life is curing ebola, and Guiding Light is down to, like, four actors and location shoots at a strip mall in rural New Jersey.  We don't care.  Okay, that's too harsh.  We totally care, we just don't...no, "don't care" pretty much sums things up.  We're way happy if you guys are consistently entertained by those shows, though!  We wonder what that's like.

Best Story: The Death of Babe Carey, All My Children

For years, Arabella Carey Cramer Chandler, also known as "Babe" also known as "the character who left trails of death, destruction and disease in her wake in a way that is only rivalled by World Wars", also known as "The Serial Drama Readers Choice For Worst Character in Daytime", irritated, outraged and appalled the ever-dwindling AMC audience.  Until the fateful day that a tornado made its way to suburban Pennsylvania and KILLED HER.  And it was amazing.  It's possible that the writers intended for the loss of this young wife, beloved daughter and occasional mother to be a gut-wrenching affair and, um...they missed the mark there.  But the euphoria that this story brought, however unintentional, was truly a soap highlight of 2008.

Worst Story: Michael Gets Shot in the Head, General Hospital

The idea that a child being shot in the head during a botched hit on his father's life somehow qualifies as entertainment is baffling enough but for someone to actually state, in a national magazine, that this shooting is a justly deserved punishment for said child buying a gun?  Is so ludicrous that between the two of us (who are prone to hysterical, profanity-laced, rage-filled rants), we can't fully express the depth of our sheer hatred for that someone. 

Also, it led to Limo Sex, which . . . EW. 

LimoSex1 LimoSex2

We cannot un-see that.  We've tried.

Best Couple: Patrick and Robin, General Hospital


We've been accused of showing an unfair bias towards Robin, Patrick and Robin and Patrick as a couple, being described sometimes as "fangurls", which is worse than being an ordinary fangirl?   We don't know.  What we do know is that Robin and Patrick are endlessly adorable, compelling and root-worthy throughout all manners of repeated conversations, wacky blog shenanigans and limited screentime.

Worst Couple: Chelsea and Daniel, Days of Our Lives

There are couples that don't quite click, and then there are ones that are so wrong from the beginning that you have to be either emotionally disturbed or intentionally trying to make the audience hate you by putting them on the air.  Guess which category was-just-18-last-year Chelsea and early-40s Daniel fell into?

It is also worth noting that while together, they have bad hair.  Case closed.

Most Entertaining Couple: Erica and Adam, All My Children

So they aren't technically a couple and they spar more often than anything, but there is nothing more fun than watching Erica and Adam face off with a limitless supply of banter, history and chemistry. David Canary and Susan Lucci are ridiculously entertaining together and if some network executive would greenlight an Adam/Erica sitcom, we'd totally watch it.

Best New Couple: None, All of the Shows on Daytime

Soap operas have the reputation for being little more than steamy love scenes amongst the non-soap watching public, but daytime these days is completely romance deficient.  There are exactly zero new couples that we like. And though it is normally possible that such a statement would be due to our inability to find goodness and love in the world, this time, we feel confident in saying we are totally right.  Not that we're ever not confident in saying that, but you see what we mean here.

Best Breakup: Carly and Jax, General Hospital

Laura Wright and Ingo Rademacher work well together and are a fantastic looking couple, but nothing about Carly and Jax's romance has worked.  Ever.  Not from when they hooked up minutes after his wife/her best friend died, not when they had their splashy wedding and certainly not when she cheated on him with Sonny multiple times (including one marriage).  (Reminder:  Limo Sex.  EW.)  So to say that the breakup was a long time coming is an understatement, and would have gotten Best Breakup honors on that basis alone. But the GH writers exceeded our expectations (low though they may be) and wrote some outstanding fight scenes that were realistic and expertly acted.

Demerit because it looks like they're putting Carly and Jax back together.  But for now, let us bask in the light of their acrimonious divorce.  Woo!

Worst Breakup: Jason and Elizabeth, General Hospital

Years of build-up, scorching chemistry between Steve Burton and Becky Herbst and so of course...

LizJason1 LizJason2

...Jason and Elizabeth break up before they had an actual relationship.  Really, GH writers?  Really?!

Best Quadrangle:  Lucky, Liz, Emily and Nikolas, General Hospital

The episode that SOAPNet aired on Christmas showcased...oh, it's cheating to name something from 1998?  And we need to choose something from this year?  Um.  We've got nothing.

Worst Quadrangle: Every Permutation of the 30-Something Set, Days of Our Lives

Dear Days of Our Lives writing team:  Please stop trying to make soapy quadrangles happen under your watch.  They're not going to happen. 

Most Preposterous Plot: The Blog Wars, General Hospital

Only on General Hospital would daytime's first HIV-positive pregnancy be merely a footnote in a storyline. Instead of a legitimately good look at the issues Robin, Patrick, and their unborn baby would face, we wound up with two grown-ass doctors sniping at each other via blogs.  An effing blog war.  Gloria Monty wept.

Biggest Tearjerker: The Tribute To Myrtle, All My Children

Who knew that AMC was capable of producing an outstanding hour of television?  Certainly not us.  From start to finish, the December 19th tribute to Myrtle and her amazing portrayer made us cry, what with the use of history, the copious flashbacks and the knowledge that Pine Valley is now without its heart and the viewers are without one truly fantastic character.  It's been a week and a half and Mallory's eyes are still puffy.

Best Recast: Billy Miller as Billy Abbott, The Young and the Restless

After being wasted by All My Children in the most frustrating of ways, Billy Miller rebounded by joining the number one show in daytime and getting the opportunity to act alongside Peter Bergman, Jess Walton and Eileen Davidson.  It has been awesome in and of itself and when you compare it to the unfortunate era where Scott Seymour was physically incapable of emoting as Billy back in 2006?  The word awesome doesn't do it justice.

Best New Character: John Black 2(?).0, Days of Our Lives

It took a while, but the robotic NewJohn with the mean Muppet voice really grew on us.  We will neither confirm nor deny that his obvious hatred of the increasingly intolerable and obnoxious Marlena is what tilted the scale in his favor.

Related honorable mention:  Most Awesome Prop:  The Door.  We love you, Door.  Never change.

Worst New Character: TIE! Daniel Jonas, Days of Our Lives
and Eden, The Young and the Restless

The last thing Michael Baldwin needed was a whiny teenaged sister to join his ever-expanding family of nutbars and the last thing that Y&R viewers needed was an obnoxious character played poorly by two different actresses. We put up with a lot this year and Eden is just adding insult to injury.

Dr. Daniel Jonas is an icky grody perv.  Shawn Christian is hot and deserves far better than this creepy, backstory-less borderline-sexual-predator excuse for a character.  Days really needed a leading man in this age range, so it's a shame the writers bungled his introduction and development so astonishingly.  The only remotely good thing we can say about Dr. Jonas is that he gives us a new appreciation for GH's "hero," Jason Morgan, who at least until this point has avoided the gratuitous groping of women in his care. 

Best Return: Laura Spencer and Robert Scorpio, General Hospital (and Night Shift)

Never one to take a good thing and run with it, General Hospital opted for short-term engagements of two daytime legends, but beggars can't be choosers and we loved seeing Genie Francis and Tristan Rogers back in Port Charles, even for just a short while.

Genie Francis was back for the only thing the idiots who run that crapfest of a show will allow, one of those "little short doses during sweeps periods."  But was she amazing during that brief return? 


Of course she was.  And we suppose Laura being off in generic "Europe," thousands of miles from the family she adores, is better than being in the mental institution, but not by much.  One of these we imagine Tony Geary will finally refuse to spout the inane dialogue they write for him in which Luke craps all over his and Laura's history.  Maybe that will be the day the powers-that-be call Genie Francis for a more permanent return?  Totally!  (We have rich fantasy lives.)

Tristan Rogers' brilliance as Robert Scorpio was never in doubt in our minds, but even viewers without any longstanding emotional connection to GH and the Scorpio clan must have been blown away by Rogers' performances this year, especially on Night Shift.  Even in the small moments, like kissing Robin on the cheek as he gave her away at her wedding, he is outstanding.  We love him.  And really, really want to hang out and have many beers with him, because we think he would have very colorful things to say about the "professionals" who are in charge of GH and ABC Daytime.  Call us, Tristan!  (See above re: fantasy lives.)

Worst Return: The REAL Greenlee, All My Children

The crass marketing blitz that accompanied Rebecca Budig reclaiming the role of Greenlee was bad enough, but it is especially galling when you consider the fact that over the year, all of the storylines that Sabine Singh's Greenlee had been a part of (kidnapping and maiming Spike and having a great romance with Aidan, for instance) were rewritten or ruined; the writers introduced a terrible Ryan/Greenlee/Aidan/Kendall/Zach...thing that was awful; and the gag-inducing Ryan/Greenlee pairing was back. And! On top of all that badness, Rebecca Budig is on her way out again, meaning that we put up with all of that for nothing. Unless you count a year of terrible stories as something, which we don't.

Most Boring Character: Anyone With the Last Name Carver, Days of Our Lives

If you can name a single interesting thing that anyone in that family has done since Lexie-as-Nell cartwheeled out of that tunnel a year and a half ago, you are watching a different show than we are. Snooze city.  The writers have literally reduced Abe and Lexie to having conversations about her daily schedule.  On a freaking soap opera.  Dear god, make it stop.

(Side note to Ken Corday:  If you wanted your show to do a decent autism story, you should have called the Night Shift crew.  Actually, could you call them anyway?  Sri Rao and his friends might be able to actually save that...thing...you are trying to pass off as our beloved childhood soap.)

Most Annoying Character: Nadine, General Hospital


We get what the GH writers were going for: cute, naive, nice girl. But, as they do so often, they failed, and we wound up with a painfully stupid character played by an actress too laden with tics and exaggerated facial expressions to make it work.

Honorable mention goes to Melanie on Days, who is saved from the title only because her OTT-bitchy barbs occasionally land on some of the many characters we've lost patience with.  And in our world, bitchiness beats smurfy-ness every time.

Best "Bad Girl": Maxie, General Hospital 

We love Maxie.  Kirsten Storms is magic.  Kirsten-as-Maxie is awesomely fashionable and has super-fun hair.

Maxiebwdress Maxieyellowbeigedress

We cannot even be snarky about this topic and must break out the very rare unironic e-hug:   (((((Maxie)))))

Worst Hero: Jason Morgan, General Hospital


Worst Heroine: Carly, General Hospital

If Carly, with her demented sense of loyalty, smugness, anger problems, and general tendency to act like a screeching harridan, was supposed to be -- like the Carly of the 90s -- the bitchy antiheroine of Port Charles, she'd still drive us crazy, but at least that would be on purpose.  As written, Carly has almost zero positive attributes and is, for some reason, presented as the show's most wonderful character: everybody loves her, men throw themselves at her instantly, and she loses in life about as often as Jason.  In fact, that gives us an idea; if ever there was a GH character more in need of a personality-erasing encounter with a very large tree, it's Carly.

Also, Laura Wright, we love you, but please stop making this face:


Quickest Descent from Best to Worst:  Kate Howard, General Hospital

This time last year, we named Kate Howard one of the two best new characters in soaps.  Now, we pretty much want to kick her in the shins and shake her by the shoulders until she promises to go back to the independent, mob-hating, Sonny-despising diva she was when she first arrived. 


It's not about the hair!  We adored the bob but we love Megan Ward and her gorgeous hair regardless.  We are insulted that you think we would be that shallow.

(And yes, we are obligated to make our argument using allusions to physical violence.  That is what happens when a character gets shot TWICE in one year because of the same mumbly asshole of a duh-faced mobster.  We are going with the theme, okay?)

Best Villain: Sonny, General Hospital

Rage issues, a violent streak, deeply rooted misogyny, and an obsessive need to be a part of the mob at all costs despite the fact that loved ones drop left and right around him make Sonny the clear cut choice for the year's best...oh.  Right.  Never mind.

Worst Villain: David Chow, The Young and the Restless

For a man whose entire life was based upon hiding years of secrets, murders and secret murders


David Chow was pretty terrible at being a criminal mastermind. Not least because Vincent Irrizarry radiates sleaze, which made viewers assume at the outset that he was shady and get frustrated at how long it took the rest of Genoa City to catch on.

Best Wedding: Jesse and Angie, All My Children


Let's forget, for a second, the awfulness of Jesse and Angie's story following their wedding and focus, instead, on just how perfect this wedding was: the (52 year old!!! How is that possible?) bride was stunning, the vows were swoon-worthy, the return of Greg Nelson was excellent and the assembling of all of Jesse and Angie's nearest and dearest friends was wonderful.  THIS is how you write a soap wedding.

Worst Wedding: Sonny and Kate, General Hospital

Call us crazy but there is something about a wedding between an unhinged, violent criminal and a woman who got shot earlier in the year by his son that ends not with vows, but the bride being shot again because of mob violence that makes us shake our heads and weep for what daytime used to be.

Worst Stunt Casting: Vincent Pastore, General Hospital

Just imagining how self-impressed Bob Guza became after landing an actual Sopranos cast member on his seventeenth-rate Sopranos rip-off is irritating and the actual, wacky shenanigans of Max and Milo and their gangster father were doubly so.  Who on earth was clamoring for more screentime for the Giambetti family?  Who looked at this show and thought, gee, you know, what we really need is more mafia stories?  Who thought that women -- still soaps' target audience last we checked -- would be thrilled and delighted to see Vincent freaking Pastore on their show?  Why does this show hate us?

Most Tortured Fanbase:  "Liason" Fans

We both have the attention span of fruit flies and admire the sticktoitiveness of a group of people who spend weeks rooting for something, let alone years.  The "Liason" fans did just that and spent a decade hoping for Jason and Liz to get together.  A DECADE.  That is devotion.  And what does GH do?  Jerk the fanbase around, giving Jason and Liz a child, a few scenes together and a breakup that came before they were ever a real couple.  Wicked cruel.

Not to mention there was that whole his-and-her hair nightmare.  Really, how much can one group of viewers take? 

Most Disappointing Show:  TIE!  Days of Our Lives and General Hospital

It's not even worth writing out in detail for the 10,000th time, so to sum up, General Hospital has no right to suck as much as it does.  Add a decent writing team to the stellar cast and fantastically layered history, and you'd have soapy perfection.  Instead, tune in next week for mob war #597!  Hopefully, a toddler will get shot so that kids everywhere learn a valuable lesson.

Days of Our Lives is a little sadder, and more disappointing, for us.  It's more disappointing because at one point last year, Days really seemed to be on an upswing, while GH has been languishing in mobville for the better part of a decade and everyone involved with it seems to think that's a-ok.  But the current Days writing team swept away all progress away from the years of laughably ridiculous storylines and seems to have no regard for history, very little wit, and zero commitment to long-term story arcs that are actually interesting.  Plus it's a soap opera on which we hate or are bored by every couple, except the veteran ones who are practically invisible.  And all of this is happening as the show stares down the barrel of cancellation within a couple of years.  Now that we think about it, "disappointing" doesn't really seem to cover it.

Most Improved Show: General Hospital: Night Shift

If you had told us this time last year that we would be naming Night Shift the best of anything in 2008, we would have put money only on something like "best excuse for profanity-laden tirade late at night" or "best attempt to skate by totally on people's nostalgia for Robin Scorpio and Jason Thompson's intensely hot hotness."  But then something amazing happened:  A new executive producer and head writer put a darned good soap on the air.  For 13 consecutive weeks!  A soap that was based on relationships and drew on the characters' histories and interactions.  It was everything that General Hospital should be but hasn't been since the '90s.  We even had trouble being bitchy and hypercritical about it!  US!  It was a strange and wonderful time.

Side note:  Much as we hate to openly disagree with the powers-that-be at Soap Opera Digest, who are kind/crazy enough to pay us to write a monthly column in which we essentially take huge bites out of the soap hand that feeds them, we must quibble with their selection of Days of Our Lives in this category in their year-in-review issue.  Perhaps it's possible that "improved" has many less common meanings, including one somewhat along the lines of "borderline unwatchable and apparently written by people with the attention span of gnats," but if so, they should have been specific!

Best Show:  Night Shift

For all the reasons listed above, and because Jason Thompson's intensely hot hotness was on full display.

Runner up:  One Life to Live.  Sure, we don't watch it, but we like our inboxes to be polluted only by unique opportunities to get rich in a very short period of time, as opposed to OLTL-related hate mail.  We are still a bit skeptical, as we watched an episode several months ago in an attempt to understand the brilliance and blog about it, but the episode included some of that Mendorra fiasco and the beginnings of the Todd-romances-Marty disaster.  We drafted and then deleted the post and never spoke of it again.  Until now.  We know we should have left well enough alone...so, woohoo, OLTL!  You are probably a much better show than we think you are based on the 44 minutes we saw.

Best Actor: Tristan Rogers, General Hospital: Night Shift

Not to be the type of people who lavish massive amounts of praise with all manner of highfalutin adjectives, but...Tristan Rogers was a revelation on this season of Night Shift as Robert Scorpio battled cancer.  He made us laugh, he made us cry, he made us remember when we loved General Hospital.  He even made Antonio Sabato Jr. look like a natural and talented actor.  Tristan Rogers rules and we will hear no different from anyone. 

Best Actress: Melody Thomas Scott, The Young and The Restless

Melody Thomas Scott has never won an Emmy.  Unbelievable, right?  She is way overdue for actual, legitimate recognition but this year, she'll have to settle for the praise that comes with being Serial Drama's Best Actress of the Year.  No matter how horrible her lines are (and she's had some clunkers) or how ludicrous her story is, she gives it her all; even relegated to the background, she can be depended on for some quality reaction shots.  Every scene she is in should go on her Emmy reel and, fingers crossed, she could maybe win one of these days.

Worst History Rewrite: Undead Diego Is the Text Message Killer, General Hospital

So you kill off Emily Quartermaine and Georgie Jones, legacy characters with eons of storyline potential between the two of them.  No big, right?  But oops, you forgot to decide who the killer was going to be.  Your red herrings of Coop and Logan could get you into trouble for portraying veterans, again, as unhinged lunatics, so you need to come up with a surprise, something that will shock the viewers...and you settle on a character that viewers saw DIE ONSCREEN and who had already once been thrown under a bus and randomly named the villain in a previous shitty storyline?  That is 32 flavors of blatant hatred for your audience coupled with an extreme inability to craft a story that doesn't suck.

Most Offensive Plot Twist: Zach Fathering Bianca's Baby, All My Children

A quick recap:

Bianca, Kendall's sister, asked Zach, Kendall's husband and the brother of the man who raped Bianca and fathered her first child, to be the father of her second child. And Zach agrees. And neither of them mention it to Kendall.

There is probably an eloquent way to describe how completely terrible, offensive and downright ludicrous that entire premise is, but we are still stuck on the "Incoherent and Yelly" stage of rage: WHO THOUGHT THIS STORY WAS A GOOD IDEA AND WHY DID THEY THINK THAT WHYWHYWHY?

Cheesiest Moment: Nikki and Victor on the Beach, The Young and the Restless

There are times when we are embarrassed to be on the record as soap viewers.  That was one of those times.

Best Soap Child: TIE! Cameron Webber, General Hospital
and Kathy Martin, All My Children

Our fondness for Cameron Webber and Braden Walkes is well-documented and he continued to make Port Charles a better place in every scene in which he appeared this year. Over in Pine Valley, Kathy's awesome, albeit short-lived, descent into evil spawn territory gave Cam his first real competition in this category. When she ripped the head off of the "Krystal" doll she was playing with? AWESOME.

Honorable mention:  Cam's little bro Jake is gaining on him.


Duh Face of the Year: Sonny Corinthos, General Hospital

Becca:  I assume the Duh Face winner is the usual?
Mallory:  It is really just a matter of finding the best Maurice Benard pic.
Becca:  Totally. 
Mallory:  Sometimes I truly love our job. 

Sonnyduh4 SonnyduhfacetwoSonnyduhfacetwo2

Worst Attempt to Impersonate a Network Dedicated to Airing Soap Operas
and Preserving the Daytime Drama Genre:  SOAPNet

It's not surprising that a network helmed by Brian Frons is hopelessly inept, frustrating and embarrassing. What is surprising is the lengths that SOAPNet goes to to be those things.  Buying the rights to movies so bad that Lifetime passed up on them?  An attempt at celebreality showsUsing the website as a celebrity news and gossip siteSpending the Daytime Emmys pre-show promoting the career of a Disney singer?  All of those are terrible ideas and, above all, have NOTHING TO DO WITH SOAP OPERAS.

Screencaps courtesy of all our usual friends.  Thanks so much for all your great 'caps in 2008!


I have to laugh when people say "get over it" with respect to Jason and Liz, and that they "tried everything". TIIC, besides giving them a child, tried *nothing*. The two never even got a chance. I'm not even CLOSE to being a Jiz/Liason/Liz and Jason (whatever you want to call it) fan, but even I see how absolutely SCREWED that fanbase is.

To each their own, but I just don't see how people can act like Liz and Jason actually got a story. 2 seconds of happiness and 2 years of push and pull do not a romance or storyline make.

I feel bad for the fans. If that happened to my beloved Bo&Hope back in the day? I wouldn't be a soap fan anymore. Period. 'Nuff said.

ACtually that does make a story in Guza land....but on to more pressing topics folks.

Can Sonny three-peat the Duh Face?

The fate of Liason is sad especially for their dedicated fan-base but for a Liz-fan-first like me, its a prayer answered by GH's fickle and vengeful Gods...

I agree with the status of Jason as Worst Hero, but I think this year Sam surpassed Carly much more easily as the Worst Heroine, not only did her convoluted storyline make absolutely no sense but the endless white-wash near the end of the year erased all those good feelings LuSam brought out in me....

Samantha McCall and the destruction of core characters just to support this bloated mess of a caricature is the reason my only indulgence of GH is through this awesome blog....

I would add Best History Rewrite -- for Robert Scorpio. GH wrote him as a douchebag but he was given a lot more dignity on NS. I'll be sad if it is indeed true that there will not be a third season of NS.

Re: Liason. I am not and have never been a fan -- because Liz is too moral for Jason (I think someone said that). But I do think B Herbst has good chemistry with everyone she's with, so that's kind of a non-starter...

While I feel bad for the Liason fan-base, they really got royally screwed, as an Elizabeth-Fan-First, I'm sending up a prayer of thanks to the vengeful and fickle GH Gods...

While I agree with the title of Jason as Worst Hero I gotta say that Sam deserved the title of Worst Heroine more than Carly....especially during the second half of the year....where not even Lucky's hotness could overcome the utter lame-ness of this bloated mess of a "heroine"....

Sam McCall and the Totally Unbelievable White-Wash of 2008 as well as the wanton destruction of core characters just to prop this unnecessary caricature of a fictional character is the reason why my only indulgence of GH is now through this awesome blog...

"I agree with most of it except any part that mentions Jason and Liz. They were the WORST couple this year, excuse me, non-couple. I may hate Ejami but at least they have chemistry, I don't see a OUNCE of chemistry coming from Jason and Liz. Both of them are MORALLY incompatible. Jason kills people and Liz saves those said people. Where can this be accepted, anywhere? No amount of writing or rewriting of these characters will EVER make me think that Jason and Liz are written in the stars.
The most tortured fanbase is Liason?! You have got to be kidding me. The most tortured fanbase is SOAP FANS IN GENERAL. Half of the shows on the canvas don't follow history, rewrite scenes and characters, don't give a damn about their viewers AND could care less about what we say we want AFTER they have been shown to know nothing about the subject at hand. Name one soap on the canvas were the fans are happy. NOT A FANBASE but the fans of the show. I will wait for your answer (just not 10 years+).
Liason fans brought the drama ON THEMSELVES. NOTHING was promised to them on Jason and Liz being together. All they got out of the deal was something that NO other woman before Liz could give Jason....a son. After that, she (and vice versa) brought NOTHING to the character. Jason STILL kills people and Liz STILL saves those people. When you can rewrite someone over morally and not have the fans jump all over your back, that's when Jason and Liz will be together. But I will give you some advice, don't wait too long for that to happen.
I'm not trying to be brutal or mean but you just have to get over it by now. They have tried every single route with Jason and Liz and it ain't happening. They have tried to have them as friends, as secret lovers, as public lovers all those years back, what else is there for them to go? It comes a point in time where you have to admit that there is nothing that can be possibly done."

Are you flipping kidding me? General Hospital is a soap... always has been and ALWAYS will be. Elizabeth and Jason are FICTIONAL characters who have a right to have a FICTIONAL relationship PERIOD!!! Obviously they have some kind of chemistry if fans have patiently waited for them for almost a decade to finally be together and some are still in waiting for their union. And please do know your facts before opening your fat mouth to discredit them or their fanbase!

That's all I have to say on that one!

Jason and Liz do nothing for me, but I agree that their fan base has been completely jerked around. Not only that, but the character of Jason has been made even more reprehensible (if that's possible). A man who won't leave the mob for the woman he supposedly loves and his own son? Please.

Haha Liz and Jason most tortured fanbase? Don't you have to have a fanbase to be tortured? 10 emailing, voting monkeys does not a fanbase make. Claim all they want that sweeps is tanking cause of their moral indignation but its tanking cause Luza can't write! Even if he could, Liason/Jiz still wouldn't have chemistry!

I have to respectfully disagree with one category.

Worst New Character is a tie between Ana and Tyra on The Young and The Restless. UGH. If that kid sings one more time, I'm gonna vomit. The only thing worse than Ana singing is Ana and Devon singing.

Great post, agree totally with most of your Days and GH mentions! Daniel Jonas is indeed the worst character I've seen in years. I don't know what the writers are smoking but if they think his fondling Chloe is going to get us all hot and bothered...well, I guess they should be writing for an iconic soap opera. I hate them, I really do.

It is very sad, and true, that there are NO good new couples this year. Days is just a testing ground, they throw random pairings at us and a month later they've moved on to another one. How is anybody supposed to bother getting invested? It really just makes me sad.

Also, Cameron Webber is probably my favorite soap character right now. I don't know if that's sad or not, but there it is.

Yikes, we did not intend to start the last great 'shipper war of 2008! Regular readers know we're not even Jason and Elizabeth fans. (We do like her, when she's not endangering her kids by sexing up a hitman, and him when he's....being totally different than than the way he is 98% of the time.) We just pointed out what we thought was a big poke in the eye from the GH writing team to some fans that had been pretty loyal for eons. Can't we all unite around how much we hate what the idiots in charge have done to our show? Please?

This is meant to be a fun list. Fun! Have fun! Be bitchy and lighthearted and...fun! Wheee!

Note: Drinking caffeine after 10pm is not recommended.

And most importantly, happy new year everyone! Thanks so much for reading!

I'm above board for everything but two things. I think the tumor storyline was much worse than the blog storyline. Man chosing a tumor over his living son. Something is wrong with that. And as for Worst Heroine. I'm sorry, but I think Sam McCall beats Carly anyday considering she rarely saves herself and she puts ownself in the danger she is involved in. JMO

I think there is massive agreement about one thing here..... Jake and Cameron are fantastic honest GH characters who are too cute and too funny and too sweet for the crapfest that is GH.

Anyone remember that Comedy Central old show Mystery Science Theatre 2000? Now even more ironic and offputtingly enjoyable is the show where Martha Stewart's daughter Alexis and her best friend and Martha's business partner's daughter both sit down and watch old episodes of Martha's show and mock Martha relentlessly!

How much would Soapnet rock my world if we could get a show where Jake and Cameron watch GH episodes and make fun and give the bitchface to just about every on air moment. Whenever Sonny shows up onscreen Jake can throw his sippy cup at the TV!!!! And Cameron can give the bitchface to Carly when she goes all screeching harpie and makes the face of shocked and dismayed moral outrage. Their little toddler eyes will roll and plenty of cheese flavored Goldfish crackers will be spit out in horror as the onscreen amoral idiots continue to be as dumb as rocks while worshipped by once intelligent or compelling characters. They can mock the plot driven insanity while stating which bed time stories they've enjoyed that could totally kick GH's tush in terms of character and story line.

I mean since Soapnet has little interest in real soaps a show like this might be just what they are looking for, AND it would actually be entertaining and soap related too.

You know I love you both but seriously what is with the Jason & Liz love? I just do not get it.

Fortunately you redeem yourselves with man other excellent choices.

I am so happy you chose Tristan as best actor. He has shone so brightly in his time on NS and his brief return to GH. I remain incredibly impressed by everything about his performances.

I would never have expected the accolades for NS either but they were well deserved. It really just goes to prove what you can do with GH when you remove Guza & Phelps from the equation.

Scrubs deserve best couple if you ask me. They remain the only truly root-worthy couple on GH or AMC. I have a couple I really like on OLTL but since y'all do not watch I didn't expect to see them. And honestly even they don't beat out the awesomeness of Scrubs.

I love Maxie too but I daresay the Maxie you all honored is fast disappearing. Spinelli is taking away her spunk, her bitchiness, her humor; in other words her very essence.

While I find Nadine annoying, I take issue with your NOT choosing Spinelli. No one has him beat is this category. Just factor in the number of times this past month he's called Jason master and he wins for me. Note how that is only one annoying quality.

Your love for Cam, however, is appreciated greatly. He continues to be my fave though my little Scrublet could one day over take him. Emma deserved honorable mention. Hmpf.

Speaking of Emmas, the one on AMC is also adorable and fabulous. Her ability to overcome having Ryan as a father and now Greenlee as a best friend should give her some street cred. How much should one little girl have to deal with? She & Kathy should become very good friends. They can decapitate dolls together and commiserate over being stuck with Ryan, Greenlee, and Kwak respectively.

While I find myself amused by your choice of worst hero, worst heroine, and best villain I also end up frustrated. Not because of you but because those 3 have had a lock on those titles for how many years now and yet nothing changes? Here's hoping next year you can give CarJax the best break up award again only this time it will be for good. (Freeeeeeeeee Jax!!)

Oh and for the Duh face of the year, I really like the 3rd one down is the piece de la resistance.

P.S. Oh and thank you for the inclusion of the cap with Jake. Not that I even noticed Jake. I was too overcome by his fake daddy's incredible hotness.

I totally agree with you, thanks for the wonderful recaps. You both have done a great job this year.....I have to agree GH is getting worse. Hope 2009 with be better. Happy New Year to all.

You guys are so right about Tumor Emily. Like I said to Becca when we were first reminded of that particular oversight: I actually forgot that storyline ever happened. I repressed it! And I loved my brain for doing me that favor...

As a OLTL fan (that's right, I snuck inside when the guard at the door wasn't looking) I have to say that any episodes featuring Mendorra or Todd/Marty were pretty much made of suck. OLTL has had an uneven year, to say the least, but when it is on its game it is DAMN GOOD. Becca and Mallory, if either of you are ever willing to give it another try I'd be happy to direct you to some *good* episodes (thank you, YouTube!)

Loved your picks, BTW! When you put it all down in list form, GH sucks a LOT more than I thought - and I thought it was pretty bad to begin with!

And for the record, I used to watch all three ABC soaps but when I finally gave up on AMC and GH, my mental health improved dramatically!

Even if you guys aren't Spinelli fans, I'm really surprised you didn't think Spixie qualified for best new couple. Despite the mob-related storyline, they have great banter, old school adventures and an opposites-attract chemistry that make them a junior-supercouple.

Also, Sarah, the BL drug is real (called propanalol), the effects were just exaggerated a bit. By lowering your blood pressure, it reduces the physical symptoms of an anxiety attack. If you take every time you recall something that upsets you, it reduces the physical sense memory of the fear. Eventually, the thought will no longer cause anxiety attacks.

Thank you so much, Sherrick, for the reality check. Liz + Jason = most boring couple ever. Enough is enough! GH is bad enough without making another couple that isn't worth rooting for. Sorry Becca and Mallory, but your "Liz" love has overshadowed your minds at this one instance. I understand, Liz is very cute and adorable, but really.... Other than that, you are right on with many of your comments. Please don't be upset, I'm more of a Serial Drama fan than a GH fan (since I stopped watching the show last year and only catch clips on YouTube).

Now, I'm a big OLTL fan and love my wonderful show of romance and real couples to root for: Rex and Gigi (20-something couple), John and Blair, mom of three who haven't been killed (finally a mature 30-40 age group couple), and Viki and Charlie (finally a mature senior couple), even Starr and Cole (teen romance) are realistically developed. And then David Vickers (Tuc Watkins) best thing ever on daytime.

They use the character history and weave it through the story lines and take the time to develop characters, and don't just change their personalities on us. It's not PERFECT, which is okay, but it's well-written and I'm sure that brings jealousy from the other ABC shows; since OLTL has a smaller budget and has to depend on good writing, rather than those cool computer graphics, and shoot'em ups and tornadoes.

Anyway, I don't watch any of the shows you wrote on, but I do love reading your blog. I did watch all the Scorpio/Drake stuff on YouTube and have to add baby Emma as the cutest baby of all.

I'm sorry you missed out on the BEST show on ABC daytime and got stuck with AMC and GH. I mourn for you having to endure the suckage. It's good you at least get to watch Y&R, which I've heard has gotten really good.

Thanks for the Best and Worst of 2008. I've been waiting for this post, which is always so fun to read.

I was thinking about watching GH today as I got ready for my NYE plans later tonight. BIG MISTAKE! The rerun they chose as a fan favorite worthy of replaying.... the first episode of the B&W Ball.

MASSIVE SUCKAGE that led to a very UNhot Patrick, tumor Emily and retarded Nikolas, CGI Jason on a speed boat in the rain, Leyla taking a bullet to save her date the very UNhot Patrick, the worst Liz has ever looked, Sam's gloves and dress disaster, myterious never mentioned again fainting Robin, Logan vs. Johnny for freakin' Lulu, Zacharra arrivals all around, the endless insanity and ridiculousness of the Text Message Killer and so on and so on.....

Reminding viewers of this disaster is ratings suicide.

HOWEVER, a tiny ray of humor was born from this clusterf..k. Daddy Zacharra. Anthony Z. does one thing so right and so hilarious it made me laugh out loud. Whenever he says Lulu's name I snicker with glee as he mocks her..... "Looo Loooo". And to top off that he used to call for his lackey Logan by calling him "monkey"! Like when he needed to be wheeled to the toilet or into another room he would call out "monkey" and Logan would come assist his boss.

I hate all the endless mob crap, but I love "Loooo Looo & Monkey"!

RIP Monkey.

"CGI Jason on a speed boat in the rain..."

Hee, Sarah! During those scenes I kept hearing Queen singing, "FLASH! Ah-ahhh! He'll save everyone of us!"

i agree with most of the things you said. Tristan Rogers definitely deserves best actor. I loved Night Shift, that's how GH should be written. Scrubs are so freaking cute, they're my second fav GH couple.

I liked Liz before the Liason crap, but she has gotten so annoying with her whiny voice. Liason are no Supercouple, they're boring as hell cuz there's no chemistry. They only way they could possibly have a relationship would be if he left the mob. One thing i can agree with is that their fanbase was screwed. TIIC wrote nothing for them, and for two years we had to endure a crap storyline of Liz endangering her children for some sex.
Nadine is truly the most annoying character to come on board, and the brain tumor had to be the worst storyline ever. In my mind, it never happened. Hopefully 2009 will be a better for GH. Thanks for postin.
Happy New Years,guys!

Viva la Nightshift. Hearts, flowers, Sri, Robert Scorpio!

DAYS wins Most Disappointing. We have come to expect the same mob worship year in and year out on GH. DAYS could have returned to glory but crashed harder than the plane that killed Grandpa Shawn. I hate to say it but I think I would have rathered that Days of Our Lives been cancelled than be renewed for whatever little stay of execution it got. I now hate every character on the show. They made me hate Sami and Phillip!! I can't even watch for the shirtless hot guys without feeling ill! How does that happen!?! For shame DAYS.

"bitchiness beats smurfy-ness every time"...Can I get that on a bumper sticker or some flair on facebook or something?

For the record, I hate Liason and am eternally grateful they are done but what the writers did by stringing them along wasn't cool. It didn't do anyone any good. Liason fans were tricked into thinking something was coming and non-Liason fans, like moi, had to endure their "relationship" for no reason. Nothing really happened. Couldn't nothing have happened in a 2 month story arc instead of 2 years? It just seems like wasted time for everyone involved...which now that I think about it...has become the General Hospital writers creed since 1999. Waste time, don't bother with story.

I like many of your picks but considering that you do not watch 4 out of the 8 soaps currently on air, means you do not have half of the background and involvement I believe is needed to make a valid Best & Worst list. I am not trying to be a negative nelly but without watching B&B, ATWT, GL and especially OLTL, which does not cure cancer but can cure soap boredom blues, you are missing out on some of the finer and random other best and worst incidents in all of soap opera. Maybe you guys need a disclaimer at the top of the site that says "only follow GH, DOOL, Y&R and AMC... sorry but for the rest of you we've got nada." Anyway, for the shows you do watch, I enjoy your columns immensely and love your humor, intelligence and thought that goes into the genre, especially the crappy-crap of GH and DOOL (once 2 of my all time faves). After over 30 years of watching soaps though, Y&R and B&B are my staples and I sort of gravitate to the shows that are getting some sort of critical notice and start watching them regularly since I have at one time or another watched all of these regularly, but now only have the time to watch 4 soaps regularly so this is why DOOL is not on my TIVO season pass list like it was for years (and regular watching schedule and VCR taping schedule). I would replace GH if I could but unfortunately, there isn't enough of a reason to watch any of the other shows. So right now, it is Y&R, B&B, GH and OLTL for me and I pray that Dena Higley and Ken Corday will get possessed by Satan and either improve the show as quickly as Y&R did or they will get fired. I wish the same fate for Brain Frons, Guza and Phelps who have driven GH right into the exploding warehouse it never meant to go. Also, GL needs to get back to the glamorous sets and sophisticated, cosmopolitan city that Springfield used to be and not this lower middle class farm town that it is now. And ATWT literally needs Douglas Marland to come back from the dead for anything positive to happen to that pile of crap they call a daily soap. I can be snarky too, see. Anyway, Happy and a healthy New Year 2009, ladies, and here's to much more serial drama to come...
xoxoxo - Corey

At this point, I notice particular fan bases being upset about the writing for their favorite couple. What all GH fans need to realize is that the writing is awful for the entire cast and show. If you are satisfied, just wait...the character destruction of your fav will eventually come because deconstruction is all Guza can do. I'm hoping Tony Geary permanently goes back to Amsterdam because I cannot believe how he has stomped on the LnL 30 year legacy he vowed to always protect. I'd love to see Ned, Lois, and Brook Lynn along with Dillon return. And why oh why are they bringing back Natalia L with her limited acting ability over Lindze?? Most of us would much rather have Alan and Georgie than these pitiful new characters that come, fizzle, then go (usually in body bags I might add). Now that Robin and Patrick are in wedded bliss with a baby, be very careful Scrubs fans...this is when Guza is at his most destructive.

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