The Day's Dumbest Dialogue

I adore John Aniston.  I think he is the quintessential soap villain.  He IS Victor Kiriakis.  I know it's super creepy and weird when people refer to actors by their characters' names, but come on, if you saw the dapper Mr. Aniston at the mall -- buying shoes or sipping an Orange Julius or seeing his daughter's dog movie -- you would totally squeal "Victor!!!" before you even knew what what was happening.  This man fully embodies his character and can sell virtually any dialogue.  He managed to make it through the entire James E. Reilly era without rolling his eyes onscreen or substituting expletives for the crap that passed for lines back then.  But today, I learned that there is shitty writing that even John Aniston cannot salvage.

Victor:  Now wait a minute Phillip.  I've got something to say to you that's very important.  You too, Brady.  Something that's going to affect you both very profoundly.  Now you two are more than just employees to me because you happen to be my descendants as well.  Which makes me deeply disappointed and saddened you would put your fragile egos against the greater good of Titan.
Phillip:  Are you done yet?
Victor:  No, I'm not done.  I haven't even gotten to the point.  Which is that you can take your outrage and your self-righteous wrath and shove it.  Now, if that's ambiguous to either one of you, let me put it in the very direct words of my personal hero, the great Donald Trump.  ::puts on strong New York accent::  You're fiyahed.  Both of ya.

I realize this was all supposed to be part of Victor's Parent-Trap-esque manipulation of Brady and Phillip, but there are still at least a dozen things wrong with that conversation, including:

1. The only person to whom Donald Trump is a personal hero is Donald Trump.  And maybe Omarosa, if there is a camera nearby.  Certainly NOT Victor Kiriakis, who would sooner let Trump turn all of Athens into a casino complex than idolize that obnoxious, fame-whoring asshole. 
2. "Shove it?"  No.  I'm sorry, Victor Kirakis does not say "shove it."  I was already predicting a Victor-has-a-brain-tumor storyline after he said "Throw the bitch out on her ass" last week, but if that's not forthcoming and this is just these lazy writers' version of Kiriakis badassedness, I may have to curl up into the fetal position until 2009.
3. "Now you two are more than just employees to me because you happen to be my descendants as well."  NOBODY, fictional or real, talks like this.  It is too ridiculous for even Damien Spinelli.  There are people getting paid actual American dollars to write this crap?
4. The fake accent.  Let's never speak of it again.

This show is becoming more annnoying and ridiculous than this year's peep-toe boots trend.  And I didn't think I would ever say that about anything.

Comments

[Colleen]

"I adore John Aniston. I think he is the quintessential soap villain. He IS Victor Kiriakis." HERE HERE!!!

But I have to agree...DAYS suckage continues to tear apart our favs!

[Celine]

I missed today's episode, and now I'm kinda sorry I did... in a twisted sort of way.

[dee]

I like Victor because although he has a history of being a super-villain, he shows other sides of himself, at least in the past 5 years or so, which connects him with his audience. He can be icy cold, and then very warm.

Probably would drive everyone crazy, but at least he used to do it with panache, now...they are dumbing him down.

[Tripp]

The descendants line really stands out. Who calls their son and grandson that? And are we headed for a crossover show with Days and The Apprentice. If Dena was writing it, Melanie would win the whole damn show.

[Izzi]

OMG, SO agree with you! Particularly ab the peep-toe boots---WTFFF??!!

[esp13]

I love John Aniston and Victor and have since the day I watched this scene.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AM4dynEz_qY

This was my first exposure to Victor (I had just started watching Days) and absolutely adored the quite menace he showed and the amazing vibe Victor and Steve have in this scene. Plus, the convo between Bo and Steve is great as well.

God I wish somebody could remember how to write decent dialogue on this show. Crappy storylines are one thing because they can be influenced by many things. But, there is no excuse for crappy dialogue.

[Nolebucgrl]

I cringed through that whole scene. Victor has not been written well at all since his recent return from wherever the hell he was for months on end. They're making him into some curmudgeonly type instead of menacing and endearing all at the same time. Donald Trump is the doody that Victor would wipe off his shoe with a look of disgust, not a friend or hero. I hate Higley.

[Jennyp]

Victor is my favorite DAYS character. I'm glad he's not dead, or in the character closet with Alice, or bankrupt, wearing fuzzy sweaters, and doddering. That being said--is there a new season of "The Apprentice" coming? Are they forcing DAYS to remind people of Trump's existence? Did Mr Aniston run over Dena Higley's cat, and this is his punishment? What?

[Susan]

I'm glad to know I wasn't the only one cringing for that entire scene. I swear I mumbled, muttered and screamed about the terrible writing so much, my roommate thought I was going crazy. If Dena Higley knows how to do something, it's create crap and ruin everything she touches. Can the real Victor Kiriakis please stand up and kick her ass!

[Rain StormRaider]

This show lost me long before the Donald was ever mentioned.