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« He Never Fails To Fail | Main | I Suppose This Is Technically Giving The Viewers What They Want »

June 19, 2009

True Romance

I have long abandoned any hope of tuning into General Hospital for love in the afternoon, because that's something that this show simply doesn't do (aside from Bob Guza's all-abiding love for Steve Burton). 

And judging by their latest attempt at recapturing the, uh, magic of Nikolas and Emily's love story, I'd prefer that they not even try, because if this is what they consider romantic, I...worry.

Nikolas: Well, you're part of Emily. Emily's part of you. I just can't really separate one from the other anymore, you know? And I -- I remember seeing you in her. I just didn't know what I was looking at. You know, that tough look that she had, that swagger that she had when she got angry [Hee! Emily having swagger. As if!--Ed.]

Rebecca: Yeah.

Nikolas: I thought it was all her. But now I understand you were there all along.

Rebecca: Wow, I never thought of it that way.

Nikolas: Yeah. I want to be with you so bad. For who you are and who Emily was.

Sometimes, you can only widen your eyes in horror and back away from the crazy.

Nikolas: You -- you have never looked more beautiful than you do right now.

"You have never looked more beautiful than you do right now, in a dress that looks exactly like the one my dead fiancee wore. Can I call you Emily? That would make me happier than I have ever been before."

Meanwhile, Sonny and Claudia continue to bring new meaning to the word glurg, having angry sex (at the exact same time that Jason is getting shot at. What up, 1999?) after foreplay consisting of:

...Claudia obsessing over her brother's sex life

...Sonny telling his wife to, and I quote, "shut the hell up"

...this conversation:

Claudia:  Maybe if you were as possessive of me --

Sonny: Why would I be possessive when I don't trust you, and I don't really like you? So why would I be possessive?


I bet that "Smack My Bitch Up" is their song. So sweet!


Watching GH these days is like watching a train wreck...you don't want to but you can't help it. I bet they intentionally try to top themselves on how much they can suck from the previous year.

Either this is Nik's way of conning Rebemily and playing her at her own game but spooking her away or he's clearly losing it. Either would be good in the hands of capable writers...but since this is GH the word capable doesn't exist in their vocabulary. Then again, neither does the word vocabulary. In other words, don't hold your breath on this ending any way other than badly (written, that is).

If he dies her hair brown, calls her Emily and snaps at her every time she gives him "attitude", I'll clearly lose it and laugh myself stupid. This is so awful it's hilarious.

you know days like today are why i apprecraite TIIC commitment to fail. See they release these things as spoilers as in...things I should want to tune in to see. i use them to know to delete from my DVR before i even watch it. So thanks for committing to fail on sooo many levels GH! Thanks so much!

Because of Serial Drama, I've been able to quit watching GH cold turkey. I've been clean for about a year. Just when I start thinking about turning it on in the afternoon, there's a recap here that reminds me that this show deserves to die a horrible death.

I hold out hope that someday my show will come back. It'd be hard, 'cause so many of the good characters are fucking dead.

The "decent" episode is now null and void. The horror and vileness that took place today is in excusable and overshadows the last vestiges of a decent/occasionally mildly enjoyable GH.

1. Not only was that dress nearly identical to one Emily wore, it's the one she was murdered in and laid dead in for weeks. Stephen King can't even do that kind of creepy.

2. The angry sex, too awful and repellant to discuss. Claudia is a waste of time.

3. Michael is no longer "concerned" about his physical recovery or his fits of rage. He in fact loves them. He now feels strong, powerful and damn happy to be a dumb thug. And even though the mob has done nothing but make his life miserable and nearly dead more than once he sure to be fully mobbed up any day now. Who needs college when you have Sonny.

4. Lulu and Olivia sharing a man and discussing it like Johnny is Sonny Junior when Olivia's actual Son is Sonny Jr, ewwwwwww.

5. Jason is a full on killing robot under Sonny's control. And the Borg feels nothing about that. He's just gonna kill on demand for the Weeble until someone finally kills him, and that's business and just fine by St. Jasus. There are no longer any other aspects to Jason Morgan.

The last one leads me to believe that Guza is no longer totally in love w/ SB. He has no love story, no sex, no friends, no hobbies, no feelings about anything or anyone except killing Claudia as soon as he thinks Sonny will allow it. When Liason went bust again even though they had a Son, SB got pissed and Guza didn't give him what he wanted. So now he gets nothing but being Sonny's lap dog. IMO, SB is phoning it in mainly a la MB the alleged sage of soap acting. And Jason doesn't even like or respect Sonny anymore. He is always silently disagreeing but following orders anyway. I mean the Borg rolls his eyes at Sonny's stupidity way more often than he does at Spinelli or Maxie's. Borg got nothin' and SB doesn't give a damn anymore and Guza is pissed he lost his pretty boy. JMO

There was one funny thing and it HAD to have been improved. Johnny was annoying Jason as they approached the hit du jour. And after the scripted "Johnny annoying the Killer In Charge By Questioning the Borg's Plan " dialogue, BB threw in a line asking Jason "Is this what camping is like?" I don't know why, but that was funny to me. It was so out of place and out of character. I mean Johnny is supposed to be making sure Jason is murdered in a few seconds and he is mocking the wilderness aspect of the job.

Pardon me while I swoon. That.was.just.too.romantic.

All you can do with crap like that is shake your head in dismay.

This attempt at romance is just one more reason in a looooooooooooooong list why I quite watching this crap.

I should not have to turn my volume down everytime Claudia is on my screen. I always feel like she is hollering at me. Tone it down and find another name for Olivia besides "cow". I cannot stand this character and she needs to go. Sonny and Claudia is just "nasty" and I'm glad that desk romp was cut short.

I have never been a Carly fan, but I just want her to go off on Michael or give him a good kick in the behind. Even before the rage outburst, he was being disrespectful and apparently lost the concept of manners while in a coma. I know the writers probably have forgotten, but didn't Robin say something about putting this kid on medication. The actor is good, but the writers are once again making viewers dislike the character.

Somebody needs to get Nik some help. Dude is becoming creepy.

Jason has been around long enough to tell Sonny what to do now. Why he still take orders from this man is just so dumb. Jason's chat with Johnny today, made me realize how pathetic this character has become. I was so in agreement about somebody taking him out! Yay, please do ...

today was just one long creep fest. Really GH? Emily's Desss? Really??

But that is NOTHING compared to Claudia and Sonny. Ick. Nast. Gross. Why GH? WHY?! :-(

I guess "We" bitched so much about the "limo sex" with Carly and Sonny that Guza decided to up the ante and we get: anger/love/hate desk sex with Sonny and Claws. Ewwwwwwwwwww!!!!!! I have been scarred for life and I am seriously thinking of suing Guza to pay for a lifetime of therapy!

And, another thing.... I'm sick of Claudia yelling at Olivia, calling her names and spewing her venom! I am by no means a fan of Olivia but damn I thought Olivia was suppose to be a badass sista from Bensonhurst. WTF! This is NOT the same tell-it-like-it is kick ass woman who arrived in Port Charles months ago. Seriously, pregnant or not Olivia needs to deal with Claudia and duck tape her ugly mouth! Ugh!!!!

I don't know why, but for some reason I expected Emily to appear right in front of Nikolas and Rebecca, with Helena laughing as she hid behind some bushes.

GH is terrible I am only hanging in there for Robin and Patrick, the hospital, and Lucky bringing the pretty.

Nikolas and Rebemily are cringe worthy. It would be tolerable if Guza understood this, but instead they are written as having this angst-filled romance. What is Guza thinking here? Does he not watch his own show? Ugh. They had a good thing going with Lucky and Rebemily, a couple that actually had some chemistry, but they dump them so that Teethan can have something to do for the summer until his lover...er father returns.

The biggest mistake, of course, was killing Emily off in the first place. There was no reason to do it other than to kill another Q. Instead of making NL, Emily, they make the situation worse by trying to make her a new character. GH is its own worse enemy.

I didn't see GH on Fri, but I am banking that Nikolas is going to go all Cassidine crazy based on your recap. Actually has some potential to be a good s/l imo. Much better than him actually falling for Rebecca, which is stomach churning.

Ok, who gave Guza a copy a "Vertigo?" Did they tell him it was a love story? At least I can take comfort in how it will all end.

Thank god I no longer watch this awful, awful show.

When Nikolas had that big dress box I said, "It can't be the same dress Emily was killed in." And when it was, I said, "This HAS to be a dream sequence, GH woudn't make Nikolas that creepy, would they?" But we all know there is no depth too deep to sink to on the show anymore.

And with Michael, the was shot in the head for crying out loud, he lost a year of his life, everyone had to sort of move on without him, and yet none of his doctors recommend therapy? All of that alone should be enough to require that he has some kind of mental health counseling, even without the anger and impulse issues! Instead he gets discharged and cut loose with no thought for anything but physical therapy. GH, please ground your medical stories with a little reality!


OMG Vertigo was all I could think of too! The concept is exactly the same. The execution on the other hand... well

GH has become so horrible that most of the time I just read recaps. The "angery sex" angers me. I know Sonny is supposed to have a dark side but writing him as only dark is getting really old, really fast. All of his complex and interesting layers are being buried under filth known as Claudia. Her character is so one dementional it is affecting Sonny. It just baffles me how the writers are throwing Kate (and Ric) under the bus, when there are so many different roads they can explore. I feel like everyday there are more and more ppl from different couples camps supporting the reunion of Sonny of Kate. Shoot. I would be happy if Sonny was single for awhile. Just get rid of filthy claudia and story stealing Olivia.

I also wish Carly would just smack Michael. I'm so tired of him being rude to her.

I don't watch the show anymore aside from the 5 minutes of airtime that Patrick and Robin (and Matt) get every week. And I really think you need to warn us innocent readers if you're going to mention Sonny/Claudia and their angry sex b/c the show makes me vomit to the point that I've just completely stopped watching it and I'd hate to do the same with this blog. The words Sonny, Claudia, and angry sex does funny things to my stomach.
*Visibly shudders*
K, time to go look at shirtless pics of Jason Thompson. That always makes me feel better.

Man after reading this latest recap of GH I am so glad that I only watched 5min of this crap on Friday. the only reason why I still watch this crap fest is cause of Robin, Patrick, And there beautiful baby girl Emma. THATS IT. I really hope that Kimberly and Jason leave this show soon cause as soon as they go, I go. I HATE BOB GUZA FOR DESTROYING WHAT ONCE WAS ONE OF MY FAVORITE SHOWS ON TV PERIOD.

I never cared that Michael got shot. Was never a fan of the brat. Never cared about Sonny's feelings. I always agreed with him when he blamed himself. I think he should take on all the blame. Claudia accepts that she's kinda evil. She may claim to care and feel love, but that's just one of her survival techniques. Sonny is the one that is always crying about how much he loves his family and blah blah blah, but fails to actually protect them or do anything to keep them out of danger. If he is going to screw the woman he is almost sure got his kid shot then he deserves no sympathy and anything that happens to his family is all his fault. Either get rid of Claudia (baby or no baby) or own up to the fact that you really don't care how dangerous she is. He let her take his kid for a walk!! I'm rooting for Claudia. I would love it if Michael found out she hired the hitman and forgave her. That would drive everyone, especially Jason crazy! If she can continue to piss Jason off, then there will always be a special place in my heart for her.

My boyfriend (who is forced to watch the show bc that is something NO ONE should have to go through alone) thinks that Claudia is going to reclaim the Zacchara org. and take Michael with her, so he can be Jason to her Sonny. I want that to happen so badly it frightens me. Because I actually want the fictitious characters to be in pain the way they give me (and my beloved Quartermaines) pain. I'd trade Sonny in for Claudia any day, and I'm pretty sure that makes me a bad person.

Sorry. This show makes me angry. And not in a "I want to have sex" kind of way.

Nikolas: Yeah. I want to be with you so bad. For who you are and who Emily was.

Did this sound as weird on TV as it reads on my screen? Yuck.

I haven't seen any of the other soaps in ages, but I feel confident in saying that these two couple are among the very worst current soap couples.

Especially Nikolas and Rebecca. It's like he fell of his horse and hit stupid on the way down.

Alie, I think you meant one-DIMENSIONAL, but I'm not positive, because Claudia IS completely demented!

GH is terrible I am only hanging in there for Robin and Patrick, the hospital, and Lucky bringing the pretty.
Oh honey. I'm right there with you. That's what gets me through the shitness.

Guza is purposely destroying GH to get it cancel and no one is doing anything about it and I just can't watch this crap anymore :(.

Forgot to mention -

PLEASE GH stop playing that wretched "Would you like it.... " song during sex scenes. It's creepy and stupid. :[

@no relation to steve: "Sorry. This show makes me angry. And not in a "I want to have sex" kind of way."


I've been clean from the show for almost 2 years -- since the still-unrivaled-in-repulsiveness Jax rape storyline. Do they make a chip for that like they do in AA? Okay...I didn't go cold turkey. I watched Carly's grief at Michael's shooting, because I do appreciate acting. And Robin and Patrick's wedding because I do appreciate Robin and Patrick. But it was just a little taste. I swear!

The only reason I am still watching this show is for the Scorpio /Drake/Jones family--that is it. I am so far enjoying the murder mystery with the mayor because the mob is NOT involved in the story (YET). This show could be wonderful again with some decent storylines and direction but until Guza is gone nothing will change. Claudia creeps me out to no end--- I would truly get rid of the mob in encompassing year long arc. In the end -- Sonny and his clan gone-- Kate, Olivia, Dante, Claudia, Johnny, Max, Milo- the whole lot of mobsters. Michael turns to the Quartermaines and Jason has regained his Quartermaine memories and tries to reconcile his two lives. I would get rid of Ethan--sending him back to Holly and Rebecca and Ethan ride off in the sunset with Nikolas' money since he is acting like a sap he deserves to lose his money. -- See solved all the ick factor

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