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« Our Column in the 7/28 Issue of Soap Opera Digest | Main | Where "ABCD" Stands for "Always Babies & Children in Danger" »

July 24, 2009

History Whitewashing Itself

This week marked the first time that Sonny has spoken to Claudia with...well, it's not respect, exactly, but he dialed back the searing hatred and was no more dismissive of her than he is of anyone. Naturally, this about face was the result of Claudia proving her value to society. Well, the society of Sonny, which means that said value consists solely of being pregnant with his child, not Ric's. 

As it's not uncommon to spend the first few days of a new love staring at the world through rose-colored glasses and dreamily reminiscing about the adorable way you and your new love met, it's unsurprising that Sonny has started to view his marriage in a whole new light. Just substitute "the first few days of a new love" with "the first few hours of speaking to your wife without simultaneously fantasizing about her gruesome murder" and that explains this:

Sonny: Ok. [Sighs] Uh, first of all, you know what? I just want to... I want to apologize, 'cause I know I've been hard on you and all that. Uh... whatever we've done together, it's, you know, we've made this baby. And I can see, you know, that you--how much you love our baby, and I respect the decision you made tonight. And you're thinking like a mother, and i think you're going to be a great mother [I will sum up the preceding lines with "sic" and an eyeroll--Ed.].

Claudia: Thank you, Sonny.

Sonny: You're putting yourself on the line for this baby, and, uh...when you get through this operation... we're going to give this baby a great life...together.

I'm going to ignore the "made this baby" phrase, because that sentence always gives me the heebies, and focus on the "I've been hard on you and all that". And not even the maddening vagueness of the "and all that" part (I guess love means never having to detail the myriad ways in which you demeaned and made threats against the life of another person), but the "I've been hard on you". That's an awfully sanitary way of describing his behavior. Detailing this behavior would undoubtedly take weeks, so let's just sum it up with four key quotes:

Behavior #1: Mocking disrespect

Claudia:  No, but you need somebody.  You're going to need an ally.  You need someone who's loyal, who's not afraid to disagree with you.  Someone that you respect.  Someone you trust.
Sonny:  ::laughs mockingly::  Okay.  Okay.

Behavior #2: Vomit inducing focus on Claudia as a sex object

Sonny: Ok, but don't take long, ok? Because I need it right now.

Behavior #3: Hatred masquerading as foreplay

Claudia:  Maybe if you were as possessive of me --

Sonny: Why would I be possessive when I don't trust you, and I don't really like you? So why would I be possessive?

Behavior #4: Actively thinking about her death

Sonny: My wife is a miserable, lying witch, and the only reason I haven't dumped her or had her shot is because she could be carrying my baby.

I know that honestly recounting the history of Claudia and Sonny or, as I like to call them, Sociopaths on Parade, is a little too dark and depressing to do in the hospital while Claudia's life, and that of their child, is in danger, and I also know that expecting self awareness from Sonny is like expecting good writing from the GH writing staff (in other words, haha, it's never going to happen) but come on!

This, meanwhile, is just gross:

Sonny: You know what, Johnny? I'm not proud of the way I treated your sister, but she gave as good as she got. But there's one thing we agree on, and that's the baby.

Johnny: The baby, huh? Were you thinking about Claudia and the baby when you were shoving your tongue down Olivia's throat?

Sonny: No, there was other things I was thinking about, and I'm not getting into it with you.

I admit that I sort of want to know what "other things" he was thinking about (his past with Olivia? The way that it was totally her fault that he got together with Kate? Banking? Who he wants to win Best Supporting Actor in a Comedy at this year's Emmys, Neil Patrick Harris or Tracy Morgan? Was he trying valiantly to remember the name of his daughter, who I imagine he refers to as Whatsherface?), but I also want to spork out my eyeballs.

Sonny: The...the baby has my genes, your genes. So that means he's the ultimate survivor.

No, Sonny, all that means is that your child's DNA is pretty much a playground for psychopathic tendencies and, should he survive, there is no way he will go through life without being a serial killer.


Maybe he's trying to figure out how many kids this would be now, if he includes all the ones "HE" "lost"?

Lets see...baby with Lily, Dominante, Michael, baby with Carly, Kristina, Morgan, baby with Sam, this baby......eight kids y'all. EIGHT. I think he's bucking for a show on TLC.

The only people I feel sorry for in this whole mess is us...the viewers....becuase we are watching this.

Sociopaths on Parade? I love it and may have to borrow it from time to time.

Did he really say "there's other things I was thinking about"..rofl....hahaha....I missed that bit but I bet it WAS banking! hahaha

Sonny's the Octo Dad! Beth R. than was sickly funny :-)

I cannot imagine two more depraved psycho selfish vile GH "humans" reproducing. If Helena and Jerry had a baby (talk about scifi) that kid would be lucky compared to this mob baby batter creation from hell. And the fact that we had to see it, Guza should be in jail for cruel and unusual punishment for torturing us that way.

And who the hell is Sonny to say who is going to be a great mother? He thinks his mother was a winner. A woman who let her husband abuse him for years!!! And then there is Carly, who LW or not, is a TERRIBLE mother.

When they were all discussing the options for Claudia's treatment I wanted to ask this..."Is there a drug or a surgery that WILL terminate Claudia, Sonny, and their devil spawn? I vote for that!"

Sarah I was wondering the same thing. If only.....if only.........

SoapNOt would totally pick up Sonny+Claudia=eight demon spawn, LOL. You know Frons is salivating a the mouth with a spin off with MB, Sbr, and the eight brats to be on 11 pm on SoapNot. Having to watch this mess on aBC, Frons will definitely love it and we can watch the same thing on here but now on Soapnot. Frons and Guza, FIRED, NOW>

Sorry Phelps and Guza. I'm no longer interested in watching ALL SONNY'S CHILDREN - especially since Sonny has become an arrogant prick. I do long for the days when I actually liked Sonny and GH was an ensemble cast and had well thought out storylines. But I can no longer stomach this plot-driven, Sonny-driven show and from the looks of the ratings, neither can a lot of other people.

Sociopaths on Parade -- pure LOVE for the phrase

also, the last part of the post is SO ROLF worthy!

In a small way today's (fri.) episode took the wacky child hatred on GH to a whole new level. I have mixed feelings about all of it. The only thing I know for sure is Guza & Phelps et al have serious psychological issues w/ women and children. Sicko.

At the end of the show we see Angel Courageous Generous SuperMom Carly (what a crock of rewritten shit that all is) relax happily in her hospital bed w/ her neutered husband seeing her unborn baby grow stronger w/ each improved heartbeat. Even though she won't ever follow doctors orders, Carly refuses EVERY suggestion from ALL authority figures. The only law or common sense she follows is the one she creates. Hence her Son Michael.

You know, her brain injured Spoiled Rotten Son being arrested for killing one of his MANY siblings. That kid who is on nevery day. The specifics of his possible victim really isn't the issue Guza wants it to be because any accident or gunfire in PC has a 89% chance of involving one of Sonny's MANY offspring. Simple statistics there, small town + Sonny's demented Super Sperm.

And just across the hall mob moll #2.....

Evil Slutty Vile Rough Sex Loving Hot Tempered Power Hungry Violence Loving & Ordering Deadly Hits Claudia is forced (along w/ the whole exhausted audience) to slowly watch her baby die in her womb w/ each weakened heart beat. I loathe Claudia, and genuinely believed that fetus should never have been created and had it survived it would have had a miserable sick horrible life. But even I don't want to see this horrifying crap. What I loathe most about the character of Claudia is the wild swings/massive inconsitencies of who she really is and the ridiculous manipulations the writers use to try and make us like her or feel sympathy for her. Watching her utterly devastated as she slowly watches her baby die inside her doesn't make me side w/ Claudia on anything! The character was too horribly created written and misdirected from day one and even this horrifying manipulation to make the audience love her all of a sudden doesn't work. It can't, it's way too late and way too twisted IMO.

The whole competing good vs. bad fetus was GROTESQUE & MASSIVELY MANIPULATIVE. Yet another "shocking" plot point that is pure Guza and nothing related to a quality written actual story. "It's going to change everything for everyone like never before...." says Guza yet again.... yada yada yada, Guza...YOU STILL SUCK!

Obviously I don't love to see children die and suffer, especially for their alleged crimes or for the NEVER punished endless crimes of their parents and Hitman Blue Eyed Godfather. So why do I watch this shit?

Well. The new Morgan today out acted his legendary onscreen father in one simple scene w/ Johnny of all people. A mob kid fully grown to a mob kid who doesn't yet know he has no shot at a decent life by no fault of his own. How fucking real and sweet and scared was Morgan? The kid even cried great, not affected or forced, it was painfully real and honest. (See Guza, KIDS ROCK) He even admitted to being tucked in. I was really moved and impressed by this child who deserves MB's salary since MB doesn't earn it! But the idea that Morgan might be mentored by Johnny as Michael is by Jason just makes me sad.

And BB was incredible in that scene too. Now that idiot Olivia is going to be w/ Moron Mumbles I hope Johnny gets more scenes w/ Morgan. THEY WERE FANTASTIC together, very human and real... how un GH. Maybe Johnny should grab him and run, raise him as his own far away from PC and all mob related mayhem that is their lives.

I also enjoyed Matt, Patrick, and Robin today. The scene was super short and to TIIC probably just a throw away moment. But I saw new brothers bonding and getting closer to one another in a non mob related business OH MY :-) And Robin lovingly teased her husband about his enormous ego and they all chuckled and had a nice moment after a very difficult and dangerous surgery. They are to me, a realistic complicated family that could really thrive on GH if TIIC gave a damn. They have incredible chemistry in all combinations. They have a new generation now via Emma, they are doctors on a show allegedly about a hospital, they do drama, comedy, and romance equally brilliantly and yet, they get 60 seconds an episode.

SO I am conflicted massively, but still tuning in.

I just ranted again. But after watching my DVR's GH tonite I was too riled up to sleep. I feel better now. Good Nite & thanks for this highly entertaining blog and all the fans who love/hate their soaps.

OH NO, my post ate up your blog. I am really sorry. I knew I was venting, but holy crap that was a million words long:-( Delete my massively long post if you can. I didn't mean to take up so much space. Yikes, I blabber when I'm pissed. Sorry.

Loved the title "History Whitewashing Itself"....and it applies to any day on GH in the past 5 years! :)

Sonny sucks is about all I can muster.......

Go ahead and babble because I agree with everything you just said, and yes, I read everything. This is the second year of two pregnancies with one successful and one failed. A lot of this show creeps me out now except for Robin and Patrick. I fast forward a LOT so when I come on here and read what has been going for other characters, I'm absolutely appalled. I think it's time to go back to reading books where there's actual development.

sonny is epic fail.

Guza is working on the Sonny Corinthos father's day special where all the women and children who find him awesome pop up in little thought bubbles to talk about his awesome-ness. Then Olivia finds out she's pregnant with Sonny's twins. Dante finds out he's actually Coleman's love child.

*zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...* *snort* Oh, sorry. I drifted off during last Monday's edition of All Sonny's Children, and I just now woke up. Anyone dead I'd actually like to see dead yet?

And may I go on record as saying that I would NEVER, EVER, EVER want to know what "other things" go on in Scumbag Mobpants's figment of a mind.

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