Talk About Your Manic Mondays

This Monday's General Hospital was pretty much terrible.  In some ways it was even worse than usual, because due to some weird FIOS glitch, the audio on my recorded episode trailed about a second and a half behind the video.  Ugh!  As if you want to see and then hear, being doubly punished, crap like:  Kristina's icky relationship, Lulu and Ethan on an adventure with Lucky (you know, the loser cop brother) nowhere to be found, Claudia of all people having the ability to blow apart the Dominante thing, Nikolas totally inexplicably telling Robin about Liz cheating on Lucky with him, being reminded that Carly and Jax are going to be forever linked by a kid, Carly's talking dream-fetus, and Olivia breaking up with Johnny.  Although there was Molly being all precocious and knowledgeable, which is one of my new favorite things on TV.  It's not enough to compensate for the rest, though. What could?

But last Monday's GH?  That was some pretty good soap, people!  (And it followed a good old-fashioned Friday cliffhanger.  What in the name of Gloria Monty is going on when GH turns in two consecutive good episodes?)

"I now pronounce you not husband and wife."

These are the words I'd been longing to hear!  Rejoice!  Maxie is not permanently joined to Spinelli!  There shall be dancing in the streets.

And yeah, allegedly for him it was all about "oh, this is proving how deep my love is and blah blah blah" but let's get real:  The headpiece spooked him.

I still can't get over that thing.  Sex and the City (the movie) was on cable the other day and this thing gives Carrie's bird-hat a run for its money in the fugliest wedding headwear category, which I didn't think was possible.  Pat Field will not stand for being trumped!

But even if Spinelli got past the hat, the dress wasn't much better. 

As my grandmother used to say, boys don't marry lasses with big bows on their asses.  I'm pretty sure that's what she used to say, anyway.

I think the only person as delighted about the "non" part of the non-wedding as I was was Mac.  When he passed out from relief, I actually guffawed.

And it just got better from there.  So much Mac hilarity to choose from.  Getting drunk, being excited anew every time someone mentioned that Maxie and Spinelli didn't get married,

flirting with Alexis, mentioning Frisco and "Fericia," calling Spinelli a nincompoop.  The whole episode was just chock-full of Mac being awesome.  And then it was capped off with Maxie thanking Mac for being there for her her entire life.

Aw!  I mean, obviously John J. York will be locked in a basement for another eight months or so now, having pre-taped 17 nearly identical police station scenes.  But we had one great day, dammit!

Carly scored some points by seeming to be nearly as happy as Mac was about the wedding that wasn't.

I hate how much I've agreed with Carly lately.  It's unsettling.

Side note:  Ingo Rademacher could get it.

Robin's enthusiasm over her birdseed packets, coupled with Jason's absolute horror at the idea he would do anything festive with one, was delightful.

(Never forget!)

Nobody is more shocked than I am to find that I am enjoying the umpteenth go-around of Jason and Sam.  When I don't think about the fact that she let his infant son get kidnapped and he threatened to kill her, I find them hot and well-matched.

The garter-and-bouquet thing was of course contrived and you saw it coming from a mile away, but it was funny nonetheless.  Especially Jason's open loathing of the entire tradition.

 

Does nobody remember?  Jason is not a fan of garters. 

Related note:  Garters, please avoid dark alleys.  And docks.  And hospitals.  And mansions.  And bars.  Maybe just stick with thighs.

Spinelli to Jason:  Stone Cold's affirmation of his namesake's words is the greatest affirmation of friendship I've ever experienced.

You need more friends, boo.

Maxie to Spinelli:  You're the most wonderful, smart, sexy man I've ever met. 

And you need to meet more men.  Or take a closer look at the ones you've already met.

I don't want to get into Lisa LoCicero and Brandon Barash's business, but if they are not hooking up in real life I think they should seriously consider it.  I have no idea whether they're both straight, single, etc., but I don't think it matters.  Cast all traditional considerations aside, because...whoa.

Hot.

And their "I love you"s were adorable!  (Yes, I know they've since broken up, but travel back with me to the halcyon days of late September and enjoy this budding relationship.)

 

Side note:  Brandon Barash could get it.

Even her flirting with Coleman could not detract from the hilarity of DrunkKate.

I love her.

Side note:  Megan Ward's hair?

 

I'm pretty sure it could solve the health care crisis. 

I can't believe I'm saying this about one of Lulu's relationships, but...I really like her and Dominante.  They had a couple of great moments, with not even a shadow of the shrieking, judgmental, entitled Lulu we'd come to know and...know.

And if it's written right (humor me), their story could be really intriguing.  Especially if they get involved before his cover is blown.  At the very least, could Luke please have to deal with his one son being a cop and his daughter being in love with one?  Because lately I want Luke Spencer to be as unhappy as possible.

Side note:  Dominic Zamprogna could get it.

I think I could watch DrunkMac try to force Alexis to dance for a year on a continuous loop and still want more.

I cannot tell a lie, I laughed out loud.  Several times.  

Sure, it was overly precocious and nothing that a real kid would say, but Morgan's toast was pretty funny.

To sum up:  Spinelli is really smart, and Maxie is super cool because she doesn't hate Spinelli for dumping her ass at the altar. 

Oh, Patrick and Robin.  Adorable. 

Ew.  I think that "written by" credit is giving them cooties. 

Robin to Patrick:  You look so sexy right now.

Now that is an anytime, anywhere line if ever I heard one.

Patrick hotly reminisced about committing to Robin -- and about all the fights they've had at Jake's.

I thought that was awesome, because I am totally the type of person who is incapable of being 100% schmoopy and positive during any relationship-oriented conversation.  (I shouldn't worry that these writers whom I otherwise disparage write interpersonal relationships the way I actually conduct mine, right?)

At one point, though, the weirdest thing happened with Patrick.  Some random dude who seems like the type who never does anything or hangs out or talks with anyone showed up and was all fraternal with him.  

The guy's obviously a creeper.

Side note:  Jason Thompson and Jason Cook could get it.

Alexis with all her daughters!  Adorable!

There's her daughter with Sonny, her one with Ric, and her eldest, with...well, it's not important that we know piddly details like parentage.  Or that the daughter herself know such things.  Don't be so provincial!

I thoroughly enjoyed the "I Want To Know What Love Is" serenade, which I know is an odd thing to say about group karaoke to Foreigner.  Maybe I just enjoyed the joy of everyone singing.

Except for Jason.  Ha.  Sometimes Steve Burton seriously cracks me up.

So cute!  And the song was of course a nice little call-back to earlier this year.

And while this post is about Monday's episode, I would be remiss if I didn't mention the awesome karaoke on Tuesday's episode too.  Or maybe I wouldn't.  There is only so much chronicling of GH goodness that I can do in a week so you will just have to look back on it fondly and insert your own adverbs (especially "hotly") and adjectives yourself.

Oh, who am I kidding -- we all need to re-live this magic in full living sound and color:

The adorable magic:

And most importantly, the hot, hilarious magic:

Sigh.  It bothers me that this show can still occasionally delight me.  While I'm on this high, I might as well say it:

These two were mildly adorable.  But that is all the positivity you're getting out of me. 

Comments

[Emmy]

Yay for the happy post. I watched some clips and it seemed like one of those rare good weeks to be GH fan...er...watcher?

BUT! You mixed up the videos! And Morgan and Molly getting the "the hot, hilarious magic" intro is mildly creepy!

Otherwise thanks for another great post!

[Rene]

Oh come on, Becca. Spin and Maxie were more than mildly adorable. :) I won't tell anyone if you admit it secretly. :)

Your Mac screencaps are AWESOME! LOL! The one with him laughing with his head back, plus trying to dance with Alexis, are almost as good as having watched it. I was literally squeeing at a General Hospital episode. Can you believe THAT? I thought I had hit my head and entered an alternate universe!!

Dominic Zamprogna could DEFINITELY get it, as could Brandon Barash. HOT. I try to forget that Dante is Olivia's son and clearly almost the same age she is and just look at him as one DE-LISH hunk of man meat (and a pretty good actor, too, which means Guza will kill him off in pretty short order). He is smokin' with Lulu. She's actually been pretty tolerable since her break up with Johnny, and he's MUCH hotter with Olivia.

I dare say this 3-day segment was probably the best GH in...10 years? That means we have at least another 20 before we get anything good again.

When does Sarah Brown get the boot? Anytime soon? It can't be soon enough. Maybe Johnny follows through on his choke hold today? (Haven't watched my DVR episode yet). Ack. Claudia is a deplorable character with absolutely no redeeming qualities (I can't even love to hate her!) and I'm sorry, Sarah Brown is no Meryl Streep. I can't figure out the hoo-ha over her. Sheesh.

MORE MAC AND ALEXIS PLEASE!!

[L.]

I do believe that Foreigner cranks out "I Wanna Know What Love Is". Journey does all the other classic power ballads, though.

[Lisa]

HEH! L, I was just going to post the same thing!

Shall we date ourselves? Yes, thank you, I believe I will, skating under the colored lights at the roller skating rink in high school, swaying to that song....

But, something's wrong here, because there's no CGI! Just characters interacting! And relying on their inter-relationships! And it all took place in a few crappy sets; no fancy locations necessary!

[Lisa]

Uh, watching Morgan and Molly, and LW, it's time for bra. Take it from getting there lady to another.

I loved/was frightened by Alexis' Toddlers and Tiara's moment as she's mouthing the words and moves for her daughter.

And the Macho Man number? There are no words. If that isn't the single best thing on GH in I don't know how many years, I don't know what is.

First, Alexis, pay attention to Mac's hip swivels and snaps. He still has it; get on it.

Second, Kate, Colman will be so much better than Sonny. And he doesn't want to break barware.

[Rene]

I can't believe I missed that Journey comment - I played "Foreigner 4" until I wore out the vinyl (yes, kiddies, songs used to come on these big disks called "records" and they were made of vinyl).

We have to forgive Becca. She was probably barely crawling when Foreigner 4 hit the shelves. Heh!

[Tabby]

I really loved the reception. It edged on old school GH parties. And I really really love Johnny & Olivia together. I want them to stay together, which is saying alot because I never cared much for Olivia.

There is a bit of chemistry between Lulu and Dante. I would like to see Dr. Matt get a good SL. He's too cute to be off screen so much :[

[Tabby]

MORE MAC AND ALEXIS PLEASE!!

^ agree :)

[Celine]

This has nothing to do with the post, but I assume you've seen that Eric Braeden is leaving Y&R? http://hollywoodinsider.ew.com/2009/10/07/exclusive-eric-braeden/

[Becca]

I corrected the flip-flopped videos and the Journey/Foreigner error. Do not blog while exhausted!

Rene, I was seven. But that song was huge throughout the 80s so I totally knew it, just blanked. (Mal, OTOH, was not even born yet!)

[Beth R.]

Mac/Alexis is love! Total love!

[Dawn]

I was fortunate enough to call this the last episode I will ever watch. I saw it before the Greg Vaughn debacle (where I declared I will NEVER AGAIN watch this show)so it is good to say I stopped watching on a good day.

[Hillary]

Molly + Morgan + karakoe = absolutely adorable

Jax's dance moves = FAIL.

Also, is Carly carrying the smallest fetus ever? Isn't she [i]months[/i] along in her pregnancy? Where is the faux-pregnancy belly?

[saw]

Thanks! I too thoroughly enjoyed GH. And since we love to mock I was desperately in need of a love to love post. This did it!

The kids karaoke was adorable.

Lulu and Dante = chemistry. I also enjoyed Lulu and Maxie's declarations of fondness for each other now, actually being BFF's, and yet still acknowledging the history of how they absolutely hated one another. Depth, in a soap, who knew it existed.

I just really enjoyed Lulu lately and thats just...wow. But of course now she's off on a journey with Ethan to find Luke and blah, blah, blah, whatev..

Olivia and Johnny so good. I wish we could just eliminate all else surrounding them, mob relations, Sonny's spawn, Johnny may kill you when he finds out of our betrayal nonsense and just go with a great May - Decemeber soapy relationship. He's May she's December just in case there's any confusion. (actually she's more like September! but you get the point.)

Again I reiterate.. I SOOOO ENJOYED LAST WEEKS NON-NUPTIALS!!! Really good soap. I cried, laughed, smiled, even danced a little, and...gasp..was actually saddened when the show ended. Normally I'm just relieved.

[Louise]

Seriously, Mac's mention of Frisco and "Fericia" was possibly the highlight of my month. I think I got a little teared up I was laughing so hard.

As for how bad it got later, just one clarification -- did Nik actually tell Robin about Liz cheating on Lucky with him? I was sort of half-watching the scene because, well, gross. But I think all he did was mention the two kisses from a while back and say that he hasn't been able to stop thinking of her since. Am I wrong? Does Robin now know about the as-gross-or-grosser-than-limo-sex sex?

[Sarah]

Killer post Becca, much love! I am still a little high on Macho Man and all the adorable fun that was two episodes among nearly a decade of crap. I am obviously mental.

And Lisa, your reply was dead on. Besides the nearly always braless Carly, now we have nearly always braless Sam. In that very low cut (front & back) black dress she wore to the non wedding I squinted as not to be flashed. She was hanging out of that tiny frock something fierce, and not in a good way. On the other booberific side we had a few glimpses of Bobbie. The other missing Spencer. Her surgically enhanced (exploited) breasts were standing high and bright in that green dress thingy and they needed no bra, a 7.9 earth quake wouldn't rattle those puppies. Ouch :-(

And I love Robin, she was so pretty and funny and loving at the non wedding with everybody. And her stuff w/ Patrick, Matt, Maxie, Lulu, Mac and even Coleman was delightful. I even liked her hair and make up, but that dress? IMO, is just didn't make any sense. And throwing on that long necklace made it even more disjointed. Why does wardrobe fail so often?

Wedding wardrobe

Maxie-fail (head piece & ass bow, come on!)
Robin-fail (the top vs. bottom design by "Fashion Plates")
Bobbie-fail
Alexis-fail
Sam-slutty but would have been alright w/ a bra-so fail
Carly-almost pass, boobie support please GH wardrobe!
Lulu-pass, but hated shoes and super huge hair

Thoughts?

[Sarah]

Kate-fail (amazing hair aside, the bedazzled sheath was weird)
Molly-PASS!!!
Olivia-pass (shocking)
Kristina-pass (too busy but not awful)

Best Dressed and most adorable couple....Mac & Patrick aka Double Trouble

[Mandy]

This episode was so good it made me love GH again. (Granted, the love faded when Sonny and Claudia reappeared on-screen, but for one glorious day, the show was magic again). Hot guys, funny moments, singing, flirting, dancing and Maxie not marrying Spinelli. Fantastic, awesome writer, fantastic.

[Beth R.]

So forgot to add...

John J York could get it.

[Sharon]

If GH were even half this good once a week, the season pass would be at the top of the list on both my TiVos.

[Cate]

Seriously the Non Wedding was the best thing on GH in a long, long, long time. I mean they even allowed John J. York, Nancy Lee Grahn and Megan Ward to be their awesomely talented hilarious selves!!

[izzi]

thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you

for this awesomely wonderful post. It was like reliving the episodes all over again, and so so tres adorable and awesome!

Totally agree that Lante have potential .. yay!

Maxis are <3 <3 <3

The Davis girls together <3

utterly perfect post, esp the added clips ... Molly & Morgan are tres cute and I just put that clip on my desktop to watch it anytime i get depressed :)

Thanks for taking the time to dig up all the great screencaps. This is a column you should (i will) save for posterity.

thank you :)

[Kristina]

I loved seeing Megan Ward again! FINALLY! And with her amazing, potentially cancer-curing hair! Drunken Kate was hilarious and I'd love to see more fun scenes with her again.

Mac was also extremely funny. I, too, laughed out loud many times during that episode.

[Sarah]

Funny blog! I totally loved Megan Ward's scenes as Kate, and I absolutely agree that her hair could easily solve the healthcare crisis!!! Haha. DrunkKate was sooooo nice to see, and her harmless flirting with Coleman was cute (hope to see more of that - something not too deep, but FUN!)

[Simone]

"And you need to meet more men. Or take a closer look at the ones you've already met."

Truer words never said. Maxie is pathetic with Spinelli who is sickening.

[valmir]

It may have been Spinelli and Maxie's special day, but Mac, Patrick, Coleman, Alexis and Kate stole the show!

Hard to believe we had two good episodes back to back.

[Lisa]

My theory, Sarah, on the ugly head thing for Maxie is, a young female lead in a soap can expect to be in....seven weddings before she's deemed over the hill and marries the old cop. Now, that only is four actual marriages, since coming back from dead spouses, being jilted, fainting, giving birth, will negate the other three, but that's still a lot of outfits.

When she looks pretty, the marriage is for real. Bad, not going through with it.

[amiejayne]

So, they can afford to rent actual carnival rides, and the reception showed that there are many members of the cast who can sing and dance.... remind me again why they can't do the Nurses' Ball any more??? This newly pisses me off every time I think about it, and I have thought about it many times these past years!

I seriously love Coleman!!! If I had a dollar for every time I said that... Anyway, I love Coleman, but what was with the two random professional dancers on the bar? They couldn't have had Liz and Robin up there? That was just strange.

And although I adore Spinelli, I cringed when he sang to Maxie months back, mainly because BA has a great voice, and this song was a poor choice to showcase his talents. And then, sorry to disagree with those who thought it was sweet that the whole bar sang it to them, I thought that redux was just painful. Not quite root canal, but definitely close.

But otherwise, I am really enjoying:

1. all the romantic pairings on this show right now- except Sonny and Claudia, if you can call that "romance". Oh, crap, and Nikolas and... whoever he's with on any given day.

2. the presence and actual involvement of kids in more than one scene a month

3. more screentime for Mac, although I really didn't enjoy his "funny" scenes; the acting was so far beneath him, he can totally do funny without having to act like a complete idiot. But what do you do when they write a dream sequence in which a crooked tie, drooling, and spiked hair are meant to signify that you have lost your mind? Whatevs, he could just read the phone book to Maxie and I'd watch.

4. Alexis, who has had some surprisingly nice scenes with Sonny, Jax and others in the past couple months.

[Kellie]

Thanks for Mentioning Kate's flirtatious scene with Coleman. It was pretty damn funny to see "drunken" Kate! However; that should be the end of it!

As for Megan's hair.. hell yeah! she looked it looked fabulous as always!!

Megan/Kate ROCK!!

[patricia McKenzie]

THEEEEEEEEEEEEEE only good thing out of the whole NON wedding where JJY as mac

and the macho macho man singing of him with JT and the guy who plays Coleman.

I don't even remember anything else. LOL