Stumbling On Entertainment. The Intentional Kind!
It's always jarring to make it to the end of an episode of General Hospital and realize that your brow doesn't hurt from being furrowed, and you didn't shout numerous expletives at your television and that the hour flew by much faster than it normally does, meaning that you sat through an episode that wasn't half bad. Luckily, this is a rare phenomenon, so we don't have to deal with that shock too often.
Today, however, was one of those days: 4 PM rolled around and I wasn't weeping from sadness and also hatred. It was weird! Since I am the type of person who automatically jumps to the worst case scenario, I immediately started to worry that I had fallen asleep or otherwise blanked out and missed the part of the episode that showcased the poorly written offensiveness that has become synonymous with GH, but it seems as though Awesome Writer managed to create an ingenious diversion, sneak past his/her guards and escape capture before writing a pretty damn good show.
I never knew how much I missed having Scott Reeves on one of my soaps, but when he appeared in the form of Steven Webber today, I audibly said, "Oh, yay!" It's good to have you back, Mr. Reeves.
Also: so very pretty!
Also: pocket sized!
Also: Chief of Staff:
Steve: I'm the new Chief of Staff.
Elizabeth: No, really.
Steve: No, it's true. It was Monica's idea. She discussed it with Gram. Turns out Monica wants to be a full-time cardiologist again. I love the idea of taking over Granddad's old job.
Which maybe signals a new focus on the General Hospital of General Hospital. Look, I made a funny! Although, to be fair to the show, showing the actual General Hospital for more than three minutes a week would count as a new plot focus...
I'm excited, is the moral of this story. About his interaction with the hospital staff, however briefly we see them, and about his interaction with his sister!
Steve: But I don't like seeing my little sister upset. Can i help?
Elizabeth: I really wish you could, but i made a big mess of things all by myself. I don't know how i'm gonna get out of this one.
Steve: Well, don't you worry. We'll figure something out.
This could lead to some hilariously awkward scenes, where Steven thinks that he is helping his sister with a run of the mill problem, and then Elizabeth has to tell him "So I am engaged to Lucky, but I'm having sex with his brother, and it's all really complicated and now I'm afraid that I am going to lose custody of Cam to Lucky and Rebecca, the grifter who tried to con Emily's relatives and who knows the truth about me sexing up Nikolas, and that I am going to lose custody of Jake to his biological father Jason, who is a hitman, and Sam, who once allowed Jake to be kidnapped but I think the writers want me to forget that".
SPEAKING OF CAM, he is honestly the greatest ever. EVER.
He was soooo cute when he asked Elizabeth what was wrong and when he uncomfortably wondered what the hell his mother meant when she told him that she didn't deserve him.
Also notable Liz-related action: her bitchface when the ever-adorable Edward tried to get her to come around on Rebecca.
It was very much, "I'm trying so hard to be polite right now, you have no idea", but the bitch shone through.
Less fantastic was the completely passionless and subtle look she had on her face when she heard that Lucky would be investigating Rebecca getting run over (uh, see below for more on that).
Way to broadcast the fact that you have a secret and you are guilty about it and you are terrified that it will come out and ruin everything. She is TERRIBLE at keeping secrets, which is unfortunate, since she has a secret more often than not.
Nikolas running Rebecca over made me laugh out loud. The way that Natalia Livingston, off-screen, gave a meek little, "Eeek!" yesterday when he ran in her direction at full speed was so ridiculous, as was the way she sputtered, "Oh god, you bastard". I adored it.
Speaking of ridiculosity...um, Lucky is in charge of the investigation of his brother running Rebecca over? REALLY? So he's allowed to investigate his brother, but when Carly was kidnapped, he was forbidden from being involved in the search because she is family, even though no one ever considers her a Spencer unless she needs to throw it in her face in a last ditch effort to get them on her side for one of her many transgressions. So that's a conflict of interest, but brotherhood is not. Interesting.
Edward shares my rage:
Edward: I don't like this brother against brother. I'm calling the mayor.
Hee!
The writers have really given Jonathan Jackson's Lucky a few extra brain cells. He has a newfound sense of competency and is clearly able to read between the lines. This is not at all a slight against Greg Vaughan, because we all know he can't control the writing. It's just interesting that the writers suddenly thought to themselves, "Hey, you know what would be awesome? If Lucky wasn't a simpleton!"
Lucky: I know, but at some point, he's gonna have to make a choice like I did. He can either get tangled up in his father's life, or he can save himself.
Jason: I know. He just needs some time. That's all.
Lucky: Well, he also needs to talk about what happened the night Claudia died. He admitted she's dead, by the way. He slipped up.
Jason: Is that gonna be on your official report?
Lucky: Whatever he's trying to hide, Jason, it's tearing him up inside. All right, it's not too late to save him, but the way he's going, you're gonna have to move fast.
I could do without the repeated mentions of how he is the worst human being to ever walk the earth because he dares to be a cop. Granted, most of the raging and hate has been coming from Michael, who is...well, a pissy, horrendous beast.
Michael: You're a traitor to your family, so you better stop following me around, because I am never gonna tell you anything.
What's with this traitor business? It's like he's a portrait at Grimmauld Place [/uber-nerd].
Michael's sass-mouth routine and sociopathic tendencies have been raising eyebrows for quite some time now, and earned him a smackdown from The Holy Hitman.
Jason: Shut up! You keep sayin' that you're a man, that you wanna live on your own, but you're acting like a little bitch! Like all those other rich kids who have no respect for anything or anyone. Quit disrespecting the people who are trying to protect you. I mean, you look like an idiot at Jake's talking to Lucky like that. I was embarrassed for you, man. I still am. You know what the problem is? That we've spoiled you for so many years, me most of all. Well, I'm done. From now on, keep your mouth shut. Show some respect. Go to school. If you don't, I'll make you. Now apologize to your mother. Stand up.
I'm not surprised that Jason called him a little bitch, because, well, he is a male character on GH, so that turn of phrase was to be expected, but it seemed out of character for him to me. Sonny, yes, but it didn't sound right coming from Jason. But the rest of it: spot on. I would love for the rest of town to line up and scream at this kid.
Fun fact about this scene: if you rewatch it with the sound off, Steve Burton looks like he's the lead singer of a boyband in a slow jam about breaking up.
And then, at other times, he looks completely deranged.
I guess he got fed up with the comments about how expressionless he usually is and went all out, but it was a wee bit over the top.
The episode wasn't entirely perfect, as it contained a lot of Sonny and Jason and Franco, and Dominante and Jax, and their storylines are far from well-written. I have no idea what the hell the writers are trying to do with Jax, and!
Sonny: The homeless guy?Jason: He isn't homeless. It's Franco.
Sonny: Doesn't make any sense. Why would an artist, you know, pretend to be a homeless guy?
REALLY? Why is EVERYONE so caught up on the pretending to be homeless thing? Plastic surgery to create entirely new faces, and the idea of Sonny as a heartthrob are totally accepted as normal things, but THIS is what doesn't make sense in Port Charles?
Lulu: Look, I get Sonny's a criminal. I just don't think that's all he is, and a lot of people are gonna be hurt by this, including you. By doing your job, you're gonna be tearing a lot of people's lives apart.
"That's not all he is. He's also a misogynist, and a terrible father, and an egomaniac. So if you think that you can make the world a better place by putting him in prison, where he should rightfully be, you're totally wrong."
Lisa: Well, I know it was a long time ago, and it was long over before graduation, but still. I mean, an old girlfriend falls out of the sky into a relatively new marriage. Sometimes it's, you know, not so good.
HA! Thank you, Lisa, for providing astute commentary on this story!
Or, to be fair, the story that I am assuming is coming. Hey, maybe the writers will surprise us, and this will turn into--okay, I couldn't even type that with a straight face!
I'm not sure what to make of the fact that Julie Mond is already being replaced and what this means for this story, but I am going to go ahead and think that it means nothing good. Go ahead and call me a pessimist, but with this show's history, I think I'm more of a realist than anything.
Well how else will we all worry that THE SECRET will come out even though I'm pretty sure about no one thinks this sucker is coming out before a new sweeps period if Lucky isn't in charge of the investigation? and randomly lucky is ALWAYS assigned to investigations involving Nikolas...remember how he was part of the kidnapped Spencr taskforce?
Steven Lars obvious not so great love for Nikolas made me love him automatically. And sorry Guza i will never EVER refer to him as Steve....Steven Lars he will remain with me.
Posted by: Beth R. | December 09, 2009 at 08:33 PM
Ok.... so I have to say the smackdown Jason gave Michael was thoroughly entertaining... the 'little bitch' comment got an utterly surprised 'oh crap' from me and my favorite part of it all was 'stand up!"... i actually re-watched that scene and i haven't done that with GH...in...i can't remember.
It was brilliant...!Kudos Awesome Writer..kudos.
Posted by: Nikki | December 09, 2009 at 08:55 PM
Ok.... so I have to say the smackdown Jason gave Michael was thoroughly entertaining... the 'little bitch' comment got an utterly surprised 'oh crap' from me and my favorite part of it all was 'stand up!"... i actually re-watched that scene and i haven't done that with GH...in...i can't remember.
It was brilliant...!Kudos Awesome Writer..kudos.
Posted by: Nikki | December 09, 2009 at 08:55 PM
Beth R., I think we should start a petition about calling him Steven Lars. We've been calling him Steven Lars for 30ish years now. I'm not calling Scotty Scott either. Call me old fashioned...
Posted by: LauraBB | December 09, 2009 at 09:06 PM
Too funny, Laura. I was thinking the same thing about Steven Lars and Scotty. Some things should never change.
Posted by: horselover | December 09, 2009 at 09:32 PM
I loved Jason's tirade. Even the "little bitch" part. I agree it was out of character, but it seemed like a moment where Jason decided he had to do something out of character to get the little monster's attention.
Of course Michael had some good points. They never had any use for cops, and he only did what Jason and Sonny were already planning to do.
Posted by: Louise | December 09, 2009 at 09:37 PM
Yes, Jason was a little over the top, but I sure did enjoy it. Carly wouldn't let anybody talk to Michael like that except Jason. STAND UP!!
Seems like Liz is literally making a fool out of both brothers now. One is still clueless and the other just doing whatever she says do.
Liz's behaviour is at it's worst now, so the writers decided to bring out the children so she could have a pity party and I guess we suppose to feel sorry for her. I don't think so ...
Posted by: valmir | December 09, 2009 at 11:03 PM
Well, I feel sorry for Liz and this whole storyline. I just hope this is a set up for something that won't make me cringe regularly. I'd love to see Liz lose everything and see where she ends up afterwards...who stands by her...how she rebuilds her life. Because right now, my girl's sense of control through all of this is cracking.
Mad shout out for Jason's "little Bitch" comment on the show today. I literally laughed out loud...who's next on the Michael smack down train in PC? I wouldn't mind a little something from Edward or Monica =) We all know Sonny just wants to give him a medal.
Posted by: Lorelai | December 10, 2009 at 12:15 AM
Today's episode aside from any Sonny scenes were perfect. I even loved Jax and Carly when he was telling her that everything he does he's doing it for them whether she realizes it or not.
I loved Niz today but especially Liz and Stephen. I just didn't realize how small he was. So glad Liz has her brother in town. I loved Patrick v Stephen. I loved the chemistry between Stephan and Robin. I really loved Jason yelling at Dexter Jr. although having Carly standing there looking dumbfounded bothered me. Loved the way Carly looked at Dexter when he told her that his dad said he was proud of him. Loved Liz B***face all day any day. Loved that yell Rebecca did when Nik ran her stupid behind over. Loved how this girl could be cripple and she's in pain yet she still ask for Lucky. Love the fact Lucky is the only cop in town investigating everything. I also loved there was no Olivia.
Posted by: Dede | December 10, 2009 at 12:17 AM
Loved Jason finally going off on Michael, although it doesn't seem like the little bitch took it to heart.
Is it just me or was there more chemistry between Liz and Steven Lars than between her and Nik?
Posted by: Vicki | December 10, 2009 at 08:49 AM
Not just you Vicki...not just you.
Then again...Liz and the nurse's hub has more chemistry than Liz and Nik.
Posted by: Beth R. | December 10, 2009 at 09:14 AM
The recast of Lisa does not bode well. Good to see Scott Reeves. He is still a good looking man. I'm rooting for Robin and Steven Lars. I like that he supported her medical opinion. Good to see Robin have an ally at the hospital.
Posted by: Simone | December 10, 2009 at 09:57 AM
While I thoroughly enjoyed Jason's smackdown, and I truly did because it's probably the most glorious thing Jason's ever done, I thought this line from Michael was most telling:
Micheal (to Jason): You've never had any use for cops, so why should I?
Awesome Writer must have been in charge of these scenes because there was so much awesome in them. Lucky was calm and reasonable. And not only did I enjoy Jason for the first time in eons as he railed into Michael, but we were also given another reminder that this whole situation isn't only Michael's fault. Carly, Sonny, and Jason are just as culpable for his behavior because they raised this monster.
Posted by: KLe | December 10, 2009 at 10:16 AM
Is it just me or does Scott Reeves totally look like he could be the son of Richard Dean Anderson (in addition to MacGuyver, Anderson played Steven Lars' father Jeff back in the 70s). Kudos to the GH casting department.
Posted by: KT | December 10, 2009 at 11:11 AM
I really liked Jason today and that is the first time I have ever said that, you can be sure. The "bitch" sounded wrong to me too, but another word might not have gotten through censors.
Jax is a puzzle to me these days. I hate the way he treats Dante, especially since, as few people have pointed out, he actually KNOWS that Sonny did not kill Claudia.
I really love(another word I seldom use in the context of GH) how the show is setting up Michael as the bad seed and Dante as the good one. Michael today ranting about being a cop as a betrayal is a foreshadowing of what's to come. And the ruination of Michael by Sonny and Jason has got to come down on them at some point. How naive am I? I still hope for a storyline that puts right the weird worldview of Port Charles. Maybe soon good will be good and bad, bad. Cops will be heroes and mobsters the villains. Wouldn't that be great?
Posted by: alice | December 10, 2009 at 12:30 PM
Dammit. You all made me actually watch an episode of GH. And I didn't entirely hate it.
Count me as one happy to have another Webber in town and family for Liz (now can they get Audrey back more frequently) and to see Scott Reeves again. And also as one none too pleased with this "Steve" business.
Since there wasn't any inappropriate or disgusting mackage or looks or whatever with Niz, I was able to just pretend that part wasn't going on while mostly enjoying the rest.
No use for this Franco business, and disappointed that Lucky and Dante are looked down on for doing their jobs (disappointed, not surprised), although it is kind of novel that GH has cops actually *doing they're jobs* for once so. . . hey, baby steps?
Jax being a pain in Sonny's side again was fun. Jason laying the verbal smackdown on Michael was fun. But can someone please acknowledge that it's not like the worst he's done is underage drinking in a bar and acting like a spoiled brat? He KILLED A WOMAN and FEELS NO REMORSE.
Therapy? Someone? Just a thought?
Anyway, I'm not tuning in again cuz I kind of like having this small chunk of good feeling about the show to hold onto.
Posted by: Mary Beth | December 10, 2009 at 12:38 PM
May I ask TIIC why the hell it took this long to get an Edward/Liz scene??? I'll let the fact that it was regarding Rebecca go.....for now. They were adorable. Loved her bitchface, as always.
I am beyond ecstatic that Steven Lars is back in the form of Scott Reeves. I have truly missed seeing him on my screen. Cam was sooooo cute with the concern for his mommy, even though he didn't know what the hell was going on.
Jason's tirade was hilarious and it was long overdue to have someone yelling at Michael. As for Carly, you reap what you sow. She can save the tears and the concern for Michael, b/c the person he is now was a long time coming and his parental figures did not a damn thing to stop it.
As for Michael disrespecting Lucky and talking about how cool Luke is....um....Michael, have you and Luke ever even met? I don't think he's even spoken about you before. Oh, he did that time you were shot in the head, but his concern was more for Bobbie so.............
I was just annoyed with him speaking about things he knows nothing about.
This really was a good show. I guess that's it for the year, huh?
Posted by: realbrenda4evr | December 10, 2009 at 02:23 PM
The only thing that tarnishes Liz/Edward (as well as Liz/Monica) scenes for me is the fact that neither of them know about Jake. They're pretty much the only two people in Port Charles at this point. Throw 'em a bone, Guza. Sheesh.
Posted by: Mary Beth | December 10, 2009 at 03:32 PM
Well, I had to watch the show before I could comment (I find myself reading the Serial Drama take these days before actually watching - I think I need some warning and prep time before I can put myself through it).
Any delusions we had about Natalia turning in anymore non-atrociously-acted scenes were smashed to bits yesterday. After her "lemme tell ya'll a story bout' a whore named Liz..." tirade, which wasn't spectacular but at least all-together tolerable, I was so hoping for even more, but.......her "writhing in agony on the side of the road" bit. Really? Just....really?
Once again, Tyler Christopher turned in another "I'm bored, when's lunch" performance, even in the midst of just hitting someone with his car. Does the man have any other expression besides doughy indifference? Just quit already and save the rest of us a lot of acid reflux.
So are we going to see James Franco again, or are Jason, Sam and Shaggy - I mean SPINELLI - just going to TALK about him for the next six months?
The Michael beat down was the only good thing to watch yesterday. Sorry, I'm just too jaded to be impressed by much. Oh...Steven Lars return could be interesting if in the hands of a decent writing team, but I'm not holding out hope.
Posted by: Rene | December 10, 2009 at 05:12 PM
Jason going off on Michael was better than the invention of Snickers bars! "I was embarassed for you." Ha, take that, you annoying little mobster wanna-be!
I am desperately hoping they're re-casting Lisa because Julie Mond has good chemistry with JT and they've decided NOT to have her come between Robin and Patrick. Hey, a girl can dream!
Posted by: amiejayne | December 11, 2009 at 12:22 AM
Haven't watched this epi yet... presents to wrap, trees to decorate, parties to plan = no time for TV! :(
But NOW... after reading this post - I CAN'T WAIT!!! Jason putting the smack down on the Junior Mobster? NotEmily getting hit by a car? Scott Reeves? Liz's "Bitch, please."? Cam being adorably concerned? I mean... can you fit that much goodness into one episode?
As much as ALL that entrigues me... still, my FAVORITE part of this post is:
"What's with this traitor business? It's like he's a portrait at Grimmauld Place [/uber-nerd]."
I literally 'lol'ed. ;) Mallory - I guess it takes one to know one.
I ♥ hp ;)
Posted by: Shelli | December 11, 2009 at 02:17 PM
Damn you people! You are going to make me find that clip on Youtube and watch it. Did Jason really call Michael a little bitch?? OMG! I wish I had seen that.
Posted by: Dawn | December 11, 2009 at 03:02 PM