Google Searches Make Even a Blizzard Enjoyable

I was raised in California.  I did not have a backyard; I had a beach and a dock.  I tell you this not to sound like a spoiled brat (though I probably was that), but to help you understand why the fact that I am currently halfway through shoveling nearly 30" of snow off my front porch, walkway, driveway, car, and sidewalk is driving me to the brink of a nervous and physical breakdown. 

I needed a pick-me-up.  I needed to laugh.  I needed to feel a sense of superiority to at least a few other people in the world, preferably those who live in year-round warm climates.  I turned, of course, to the Google searches people use to find our little slice of the internet here at Serial Drama.  Mission accomplished.

could i date the girls of serial drama?

That depends.  I need more clarification about the verb "date."  Like, as you would a large tree?  I can save you the ring-counting:  I am at that point in my 30s at which I've stopped saying the specific age and just say "mid."  Mallory, on the other hand, is only barely able to drive legally.

If you intended the more obvious usage of "date," then your query prompts additional ones, including:  Both of us?  What website did you think Google might send you to that would answer this particular inquiry? Is it wrong that I'm slightly flattered by your search?

love issues: uncle and niece dating

Also, "congrats" to Days for having more than one storyline that led to this disturbing search actually correctly leading someone to our site to explore this issue in more depth. (And hey, since Max is coming back to town, we might have more uncle-niece romances to document.)

bob guza must be destroyed

I like the way you think.  His role tends to be that of destroyer, not destroyee, but if we work together perhaps we can expand his destruction repertoire.

what will it take to fire guza

A question for the ages.  I'm fairly sure the answer is "he would have to do something involving extended imprisonment in state or federal prison."

why can't sociopaths ever see reality

Enough with the Guza-related searches already!

the man in my life threw me under the bus to another woman with nothing but lies

I think Mal's comment when she emailed me this search says it best:  "It breaks my heart a little that this poor soul has no one to turn to but the robot she thinks lives inside of Google."

who hates ryan lavery

I know someone who kinda does.

obsession woman freezes fetus after miscarriage

One I got past my initial reactions of ". . ." and "?!?!?!," I considered not posting this at all because lord knows it will give either GH or AMC an idea.

how can i make my girl feel my penis in her stomach

lauren koslow's plastic surgeon

Oh, honey.  NO.

general hospital glorified mob violence

I'm choosing to believe "glorified" here is an adjective and not a past tense verb.  And I also really hope the person doing this search thinks glorifying mob violence is a bad thing, otherwise what a rude awakening this place would have been!

does tyler christopher ever act with his face?

Hee.  This is one of those searches that I just love the idea of there being an answer to somewhere on the internets.  So I will try to help:  Lately, not really.  But how important is face-acting to a good performance anyway?

Comments

[shelle_cr]

So, I've just tried to google "DIE guza DIE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

and the first thing to pop up was this :) http://serialdrama.typepad.com/serial_drama/2006/11/bob_guza_must_d.html

I always lvoe your google search psots, please keep them coming.

[Beth R.]

ok that last one? Laughing so hard tears are coming out of my eyes.

[Sam]

"how can i make my girl feel my penis in her stomach"

Ok, stupid question, I know, but does that google search pertain to any soap in particular? Probably not, but if so, please direct me to it! Sounds hella more interesting than GH

[Liposuction Prices]

I would like such a series. I am very interested in anything connected to plastic surgery, including liposuction.

[Cosmetic Surgery Clinic]

An interesting choice of google searches, did a woman actually freeze her fetus after a miscarriage because that's really quite disturbing. She should probably seek some sort of counselling instead of going to her freezer everyday to hold onto a painful past event.

[oakley frogskins]

She should probably seek some sort of counselling instead of going to her freezer everyday to hold onto a painful past event.