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« And Daytime Emmy Season Kicks Off! | Main | Soap Blog Coalition »

May 12, 2010

The Blame Game

When Carly dies (although I am sure that we will never see this on-screen for many reasons, including the obvious "The show has no other heroine, so why on earth would they kill off Carly?" and "Uh, General Hospital, the show, will die long before Carly does), I think that those surviving her should donate her body to science so that medical professionals can properly study the brain of someone who can only be described as DEMENTED BEYOND ALL REASON.

Carly: We're both responsible for what happened to Michael. Oh, we were so arrogant. And we thought we could lie and maneuver our way out of anything. And if this cover-up didn't go so horribly wrong, would we have ever admitted that the way we raised Michael was twisted and wrong? I mean, we didn't have a prayer of keeping that kid safe. And we didn't. And now Michael's paying the price.

Sonny: Permission not granted to take all the blame.

Carly: You don't think I'd blame someone else if I could? Let's start with Elizabeth, that sanctimonious bitch. Let's blame her. If she hadn't thrown herself at Jason that night at Kelly's, I wouldn't have ran to you and we wouldn't have devoured each other, betrayed our best friend, and jump-started that hideous cycle of disaster after disaster. Wouldn't have taken our son down with us, so, hell, yeah, let's blame Elizabeth. I already got a jump-start on hating her.

What the actual hell? As much as I'd like to write this off as an irrational statement made by a mother clearly unable to come to grips with what has become of her son, Carly says similarly deranged things all the time, so I have to believe that these are not the ramblings of a hysterical mother but, rather, the ramblings of a hysterical FUCKING NUTBAR.

Evidence for the "FUCKING NUTBAR" diagnosis was ample during today's episode, not just in word, but also in deed. After the jump, something so horrible, so disturbing and so done to death on this creatively bankrupt show that I don't feel comfortable having it appear on the main page, lest the authorities see it and bring charges against me for grossing people out, which may not seem like it's illegal, but in this situation it has to be, because SERIOUSLY.

Nothing gets Sonny and Carly feeling frisky more than watching their son go through a traumatic experience, which is reason #7,824 why this show is broken beyond repair.



Instead of awkwardly staged Limo Sex, we were treated to Couch Sex, and while the two acts had different settings, my reaction to both was the same: wailing, out loud, "What have I--what have I--what have I done to deserve this?" except I was so horrified, that I was incapable of forming actual words and it came out like a horror movie scream. I just...I wish I were blind.


You know when that line flew from Carly's mouth the most ardent Liz hater I know...one who blames her for everything and rakes her over the coals for sneezing funny....even she stood back and went "I'm sorry what? What did she say?"

How about how they had almost the EXACT same conversation after said Can't Handle Own Guilt Sex?

So I'm obviously not watching this show but I honest to god thought that quote was something you guys made up. Holy hell I cant believe she actually said something as stupid as that.

Seriously? SERIOUSLY?!?!?! Just when I thought they couldn't sink Carly any lower you show me that they did. Hypocrite does not even BEGIN to describe that woman. Thank GOD I didn't see that. I don't think my tv would have survived it.

I'm with Lauren. I'm only aware of what's happening on the show based on your recaps, and I thought you were mocking Carly for blaming Dante, Lulu, Lucky, etc. for Michael's situation. The fact that she really said that = mind boggled. I almost want to watch this show just so I can be prepared for the "joy" I would have felt hearing that line and thinking, "Can't wait to hear what Mallory says."

But it's so not worth it. Thanks for sitting on this particular puke grenade for me.

I think it was made pretty clear that she was being sarcastic -- Sonny was telling her she shouldn't blame herself and she was like, well, who else? Elizabeth!

Now, I'm sure given enough time, she'll be able to convince herself it was really Elizabeth's fault, but she wasn't there today.

Carly blames: Sonny, Dante, Lulu and herself. Sonny starts the list b/c he brought the violence that got Michael shot and ended with him killing Claud/going to jail, Dante for telling the judge and Lulu for betraying Carly. She blames herself b/c she brought Michael into Sonny's world.

Ick. Seeing those screen caps makes me glad I fast forwarded through those scenes.

I'm close to turning the TV off when GH comes on. The Holy Mob Trinity is just irritating me beyond belief.

Thanks Mallory....now I have the "What have I...what have I...what have I done to deserve this" song stuck in my head! Right on!

I thought the worst part of the grief over Michael sex redux was the short convo afterward when Sonny said thank you and then they had this ha-ha moment and were all like "no, not for the sex" like that was some funny joke. Blech.

This moment right now? Is the happiest that I've been that I quit watching GH.

Amen, Emmy. I stopped watching too and only read this blog for recaps. What's funny is that Maurice Bernard & Laura Wright are both very attractive people, but their characters are so putrid that seeing them getting it on can only be described as GROSS.


Seriously, I have no problem with Liz being blamed for anything, up to and including the Gulf Coast oil spill and Justin Bieber's popularity, so I'm giving Carly a pass.

I am like the rest of you, I have stopped watching GH because I will not waste one more hour of my day on a show that deminishes women like this show does. Carly is being written like a nut bar, next she brings Brooklyn to town to sleep with Dante to get Lulu back. Very mature for a mother of three. As for the Liz comment, WTH Carly is sleeze for sleeping with Sonny again no one else is to blame but her, period! Guza seems to have a love hate relationship to women in general.

Ok, I don't know if it's me, but every time Carly calls another woman a "Slut" or accuses some chick of throwing herself at a guy, I LMAO. Normally I don't like Elizabeth, but when she called Carly "The town whore," I had to laugh. Carly, who breezed into town, seduced Tony for no other reason than to piss her mother off, screwed AJ when she was with Tony, screwed Sonny when she was considering leaving AJ fo Jason, and screwing Sonny while she was married to Jax, needs to STHU about another woman's behavior.

Just a question, how many times has she screwed Sonny while married to Jax?

What wqas the point of that line? Really what was the oint of Carly bringsing Liz in at all?

Yes she was being sacrastic but if she is bringing it up she is headed there!
So why?

This show makes no since at all!

Of course Carly said it sarcastically in a drunken moment, but come on now. I don't think for once second this heifer didn't really mean it. I believe in her warped brain that she's always blamed Elizabeth based on the logic she stated.

I do have to thank Carly, though, for allowing me to reminisce about Jason and Elizabeth. It's nice to know Elizabeth is on her mind. Ha!

They had sex AGAIN?!?!? SERIOUSLY?!? Do these people not know how to express grief and anger and self-loathing in normal ways!?? Or any other way than inappropriate sex with one's mob-boss ex??

Can't wait till Carly blames Robin for this next! Thank you so much for your blogs which are so entertaining... I don't even miss the show at all.

Carly and Sonny having sex again ugh

Okay, am I the only one who could tell that Carly wasn't seriously blaming Elizabeth. She was being facetious.

I will agree on the Carly/Sonny sex though.

Okay, I try to fancy myself a fairly astute judge of the not-so-subtle subtext of GH, but apparently, I need to get my radar checked.

Am I really the only one who actually believed Carly was telling the truth to Dante and Lulu? REALLY owning up to her part in Michael's current debacle? I thought her Sonny's-hot-penis-induced coma finally snapped when those shackles snapped on Michael's ankles, and she was REALLY facing the fact that she is almost 100% responsible for her son's current incarceration.

I bought the whole thing, hook, line and sinker, when she was sobbing and telling Dante and Lulu how she forgave them and how she was just taking out her anger and grief on them.

I guess I would have been better of believing in the tooth fairy, unicorns and that Tang is "real orange juice."

When she turned into her old demon wench self in front of Jason, vowing her "dismantling" of Lulu and Dante, I was, truly, shocked. Stupid, right? This is Guza we're talking about! He must be jumping up and down like a monkey at the thought that he pulled one over on hapless saps like myself (and no doubt throwing his own poo like a monkey).

There's a sucker born every minute - I'm living proof! Either that or I have to give immense props to Laura Wright's acting skills - yeah, let's go with that second one.

Rene, I believed it to. I was wondering what had brought on her epiphany of truth. And then she turned. She doesn't even make sense the way they're writing her now, because she's telling Sonny & Jason that they (the trinity) is responsible, yet she's going to rip apart Dante and Lulu.

And for the record, Lulu did tell her the truth when she said she didn't know where Michael was, considering he had bolted when she left him there alone. Of course, Carly wouldn't recognize the truth if it bit her in the ass.

Ciny and Rene, Carly may be blaming Dante and Lulu for their part in what happened to Michael but she is also owning her part in it also. She told Dante and Lulu that she wasn't going to let Jason kill Dante. And she stopped Jason from killing Dante. She was honest about that.

Did she hide the fact that plans to reap revenge on the two of them... Well yeah, but this is Carly we are talking about. I for one think she's entitled to it. Especially on Lulu.

Lulu has had one note to play this entire story, "Whatever Dante says is right." It's really annoying. Lulu always picks her man of the moment over everyone else in her life. Does anyone else remember Lulu rushing to Carly's side a mere hours after Michael was shot to plead Johnny's case and ask her to intervene with Sonny. Or when Lulu said she would rather dismiss Lucky before she ever got rid of Johnny. Dante has owned his mistake, which means he gets my respect but Lulu. Carly has always been there and forgiven Lulu for her MANY trespasses So Carly's half truth about stopping Jason is the same as Lulu's I don't know where Michael is. Carly left out the part where it's because she wants her own revenge. Lulu left out the part where Michael ran away.

Can we all acknowledge the fact that Carly is awesome in her asking Jax to adopt Morgan?

She said whaaaaaaaaaat?!

Is Liz to blame for BOTH grief sex encounters now?!

Carly wanted Jason in her bed and Sonny on her arm yeas ago which is why she's so pissed at Liz.....

I was starting to wonder once Michael was sentenced to prison, how long will it be before Carly is sleeping with Sonny again. This whole show is a shitfest. I would love it if Anthony somehow got out of jail and took Carly and Sonny out. Then the kids can all go live with Jax, then he can marry Brenda and everyone live happily ever after.

The coma brought us limo sex, the incarceration brought us couch sex, so when Michael dies or gets raped in prison are Sonny & Carly going to have sex in a public park or something? Or maybe a threeway with Jason to mark the next horrendous thing to happen to Michael.

This show is defining new levels of gross, stupid, unoriginal, and boring.

Yeah. There's nothing like sleeping with your ex husband and asking your current husband to adopt your son in one day's time. Good job writers!

After all that, Carly didn't offer to give Jason a little horizontal mambo in the room above Jakes before he left for prison? She must be feeling not so fresh after Sonny - only excuse I can think of.

I'm taking bets. How long do you think it will be before she tries to bang Dante? To her, that would be the ultimate revenge against Lulu, not to mention she could have a DNA-double whammy notch on her bed post for bedding Dante AND his daddy.

Rene, you evil twisted Guzafied lady! You are as sick as me, GH has fried our brains. See, I completely expect Carly to be preggers with Dante Jr by this time next year. When the Brook Lynne plot doesn't hurt Lulu or Dante or even Sonny enough she is going to pull a Tony Jones on Shaagy Cop ;-)

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