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« Anatomy Of A Freakout | Main | Dastardly David's Dying ("Dying?") Drama »

September 03, 2010


Because really.  That was the main reaction today's One Life to Live elicited from me. 

Dani had time to wash and blow dry her hair awful-fancy right after her mom died.  Curls, even!


Blair was perfectly set up to kick some ass and save her damn self, but since this is ABC Daytime, John McBain swooped in at the last second and saved the day.


Also, Ford did this:


And Langston referred to it as "being all nice." 


Pinning your NEW STUDENT against the wall and spouting absolutely horrific dialogue like, "You deserve someone better like Markko or James, someone who'll put you up on a pedestal -- I know I don't do that.  But I'd like to learn."  He'd like to learn?  I'd like to barf everywhere.  Also?  If he'd like to learn how to treat a woman properly, he's not going to learn from Langston, of all people.  She's not some sparkling example of strength and humanity that's going to help him find the good guy inside of him.  She's bland and weak and hokey and gullible and a cheater and once upon a time he played her and they had hot sex as a result and now they suck the life out of any scene they're in together.  Oh, and while he's at trying to learn how to treat women a little better, why doesn't he try -- call me crazy -- not to seduce his mothertrucking student?!

Oh and there was a dumb mirrored scene in which another guy tried to get a girl to pay attention to him and she was oh-so-flustered and protested too much and blah blah blah.  So they're planning to get Starr and James together in precisely the same manner they're planning to get Langston and Ford back together?  In alternating scenes, no less?  In which the female of the pair insists she wants nothing to do with the male of the pair until he just wears her down, because he knows better?  Charming, genre-with-a-heavily-female demographic.  Charming.  Something came out of my dog's ass that I had to carefully pick up with a bag in Central Park this morning that I'd rather watch for an hour every day than that.

Oh and then?

This happened:






No, really.  That was a whole solo scene, shot just like that.  The goal of the scene was "James relaxes to read a book."


I mean honestly, I like boys who are pretty to look at as much as the next person, but this has just gotten insulting.  Thankfully the third brother Ford-Salinger kept his clothes on today, but we were indeed subjected to the full triumvirate of torture, all in one episode.  I don't care about them, I don't find them interesting, I think they're nowhere near as attractive as the direction is trying to tell us, and really?  Fuck the Fords.





Those screen caps look like someone forgot to add the "Twilght sparkles" in post-production. *shudder*


Well, it's nice to know that OLTL has taken over Passions spot as the show with the most randomly shirtless men.

OLTL is so stupid.

How was Blair poised to kick some ass? She accidentally shot Eli, immediately regretted it, and then tried to save Eli INSTEAD of herself. She's kind of pathetic.

Knope, that is precisely my point. She had the upper hand completely (hence, poised to kick some ass) and could've easily saved herself, but instead they had her inexplicably relinquish that upper hand entirely so that McBain had to come in and rescue her. By making her... stand up and walk herself out.

This show is not good at letting women save themselves. Kind of like her daughter who almost saved the day but... oops, shot the wrong guy instead.

James can read?

I liked James when he first came on, but I'm definitely liking him less and less the more he's on.

And Ford/Langston is disgusting. Ford should be fired from his job (how on earth did he get to be full professor when he's only been a grad student for a few years??? I would not want to go to LU at all if that's the extent of their professors' knowledge). And Langston will be a sucker if she goes back to him, which she probably will.

John McBore is a pet which means the character will ALWAYS save the day.....I'm sure it's probably in the actor's contract.

Ford kind of reminds me of Lou Ferrigno, The Incredible Hulk.

Blair was more than capable of kicking Eli's tush.

Langston used to be so cool -- and now she's all raging hormones and looking for easy sex with Bobbie. I wonder if Ford is now one of those "pets" and he's getting all of the good story telling while Langston is getting pooped on?

James - I like James, however, he can keep his shirt ON!

If I'm ever in a fire, John McBain is the last person I'd want near the building. He pointed the way out to Blair, shut the door on the way out, made conversation with Blair, and made a phone call. Only then did he "heroically" decide to go back in for Eli.

And the scene with James was just WTF ridiculous. I really wish this show would stop treating me like I'm dumber than Patrick Star.

I just really wanna know why you don't like Langston, and why you don't like Langston and ford together?? Langston in many ways is wayyy more mature than ford is. I really like them together because the actors are closer to each others ages in real life (their only like 4yrs apart) than her and Jason who plays Marko are. Then there's the fact that they have CHEMISTRY. That sadly is something that Langston and Marko stopped having a long time ago. I mean yes, Langston is young but she had to grow up really fast after her parents died. she is more mature than ford and half of the "adults" in that town. and it's not like ford is even 30 yet. their really not that far in age. Langston and ford make sense to me and the chemistry is there. they have that SPARK. So I and a lot of other people really like them together. As for ford being a professor thing, that is not believable AT ALL to me. They should have kept him as a T.A cause some schools T.A can conduct some classes but him as a professor MAKES NO SENSE. Him and Langston as a couple however MAKE SENSE. JMO.

And Brian Frons' plan to completely decimate this show's ratings continues...

Great post. Langston and Ford are so disgusting. Once a skeavy player always a skeavy play. "Come back here Langston" he rudely shouts to her. Hope they have Langston smarten up. Otherwise, I'll have trouble watching the show because it grosses me out so much.

I am a vote for the three Ford brothers to ALWAYS do their scenes in the sauna, naked except for a towel. That's the only way they will be able to hold my interest.

Is it just me or does Langston kinda look like Kelly Monaco in that picture.

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