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« Enjoyment Amid The Turmoil | Main | About That AMC Spoiler... »

November 06, 2010

Hyperbole and Other Llanview-esque Mistakes

"Girls like that don't stay single for long."  In case you missed it, this line was uttered by Ford about Starr.  I'm not joking.  Check your DVR, check it out online, check the script.  To be clear, teenage girls with small children, famous rapist ex-con fathers who are prone to violence against the men in their daughters' lives, and babydaddies imprisoned for murder.  Girls like that.  Don't stay single for long.  I mean, you better make your move fast because she is a catch.

And!  The word "amniocentesis" has 300 letters in it when typed by Ford.

Oh, good news!  You can totally walk into whatever private hospital room you want to and just hang out, in case you were wondering.  Luckily Brody knew that so he could "be there" for Natalie.

Okay, I'm being unfair.  Friday's One Life to Live was actually a pretty classic soapy episode.  Two simultaneous paternity tests (one potential father being a possibility for both) by two twins, a cliffhanger ending with the appearance of an abusive father, a major character turning himself into the police for murder, a gone-crazy psychiatrist getting some inside information on someone she's vowed revenge upon, and a big already-grown-up paternity reveal.  And as much bad press as she gets for hamming it up, the big red bow for me was Kim Zimmer proving why she is royalty in this game by delivering a pure old-school soap opera performance.



My bone to pick is this.  So now Clint knew, possibly all along and possibly for a couple of years now, that Rex is really his biological son?  And can't stand the guy, so set up some elaborate ruse to keep Rex from learning this?  I don't buy it.  Not for one single solitary second.  I already didn't buy Clint sending David off to rot in a Moroccan prison, as David has Buchanan blood.  I have no problem with Clint hating David; he should.  But if this whole thing is supposed to be the Asa-fication of Clint, they've got it dead wrong.  Asa was all about blood, even if he hated the person with the blood.  Ben was his sworn enemy whose life he would've happily ended until he found out Ben was his son (I shudder to recall).  Clint doesn't have to like David, Clint doesn't have to like Rex, but if he were really like Asa, he'd suck it up because they're family.  He'd hold them to standards and call them out on their crap, but he wouldn't turn them into his victims.  No way, no how.  This is not Clint.  And I like ruthless Clint.  But there are limits; there were always limits.  And this is just reckless storytelling not only with a legacy character but an entire legacy family and essentially the entire last thirty years of the history of this freaking show.

I mean I guess I should be thanking my lucky stars that this isn't "Nothing says I love you like a car bomb!" familial storytelling like over on that other ABC soap, but it's only a hair better, really.

And the bottom line for me?



This douche.  Is Clint Buchanan's son.  I just... I...

I die.




The only way I can even begin to accept that Clint would create this ruse to make sure Rex didn't discover he was his son is that he hates Echo so much that he wanted to make sure she stayed as far away from Llanview as possible. And even that would be a really flimsy bit of reasoning.
Honestly none of it really fits with the type of man Clint has been considering he has accepted Viki's kids as his own despite them not being blood relations yet he would turn on his own biological son.
Of course if the writers were to have Clint say he did it because Rex is a giant douche then I would accept that reasoning with no complaints. There is just no arguing with the facts y;know.

I really, really hoping Clint only knew since April when the truth about the Rex/Sky swap came out.

Maybe it's just my big gay genes talking, but I think Rex is wicked hot.

Just sayin'...

Rexx is a douche! Ugh. I hate all of the campy mugging faces that JPL makes as Rexx.

Echo stated that her brother Giles wanted the Buchanan money, so why didn't he hot foot it to Llanview to tell Viki that Echo had Clint's bun in her oven? Viki is a very wealthy woman, and she would have told Clint about Echo's latest scam.

Echo had something very important to tell Charlie last week and was interrupted by Viki. Is Rexx really Charlie's son?

Clint and Echo had a ONS long before she jumped into the Llantano river. I hate that OLTL is going through all of these hoops to make David (who I love) and Rexx into long lost Buchanan's, when there are MORE than enough known Buchanans in the world. Why not have Cord, C.J., Sarah, Kevin, Joey and Zane come back to Llanview instead of "old mug every camera shot, Rexx" into a Buchanan?

I totally wanted to hate her and the CBS/P&G Rejects horse she rode in on because I am sick to death of all the newbies OLTL insists on sticking in my face, BUT The Zimmer has won me over. She's a pro and she's not playing Echo like she played Reva, THANK GOD. I mean, she's still The Zimmer - just a lot less loud and in your face. The story doesn't have a weak actor in it unless you count J-PL, but he's surrounded by such acting prowess that I think some of it is beginning to rub off on him.

The other story I love is the Jess/Brody/Natalie/John/Marty MESS of SUMTHIN. It's soapy goodness. I'm not even a fan of half those characters, but I love the story!

Sadly, both Dirk and LadyBug are correct. There is nothing stopping someone from being a douch and wicked hot to one's gay genes. This is a lesson I have been taught many times but not one that I have actually learned anything from.

Except that I find it a lot easier to like Rex when I'm watching the show -- or more accurately a lot less hard to not like him when I see him physically. The recaps remind me that his character isn't as appealing as the body and face of the actor who plays him.

Kim Zimmer is SUCH royalty <3 <3

I just don't buy that Clint had Echo followed after she left Llanview, and then had the baby shadowed for 28 years so he could know all along it was Rex. WHAT. THE. FUCK?

Even if he only figured out it was Rex with the Sky/Rex switch story, why in the hell wouldn't he have claimed the baby from the beginning if he knew? That's what the REAL Clint would have done. The holes in this story - it's like fishnet, one rip and it disintegrates.

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