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« Fingers Crossed For A Rewrite of a Rewrite | Main | Little Blessings »

December 16, 2010

The Biggest Reveal Ever! Or The Biggest Reveal Friday at 3PM, At Any Rate...

Mark your calendars! Tomorrow, December 17th, is when we finally find out the answer to the question we lost interest in back in August: who is The Balkan?

Soap Opera Digest has Vanessa Marcil Giovinazzomg, I am never going to get used to that name's reaction:

Be sure to tune into GENERAL HOSPITAL this Friday, December 17. That's when viewers will learn the identity of the much-ballyhooed crime figure, The Balkan, who has menaced Brenda for months. What does Brenda's portrayer think of the big reveal? "I was floored," claps Vanessa Marcil Giovinazzo. "I wouldn't have guessed it in a million years. I love what Bob [Guza, Jr., head writer] has in mind. All of my extended family in Staten Island text me and e-mail me and call me every week with a new guess as to who The Balkan is. They want me to give them hints, but I think I'd be fired for giving that away!" Well GH fans, the wait is almost over....

"Floored" as in surprised? Or "floored" as in "I forcibly threw myself onto the ground in hopes that making contact with the floor would give me a concussion and I could forget ever hearing this?" This being General Hospital, it could go either way...but most likely, it will go the latter way.

Possible Balkans:

  • Adrienne Barbeau: maybe the whole ASEC thing is a total front and she used her buttinski powers for EVIL.
  • Theo: it's odd, isn't it, that a hospital patient is getting so much airtime? The writers may have lulled us into a false sense of security, thinking that Theo is just Shirley 2.0, except cantankerous and prone to fits of melodrama, but next thing you know: EVIL.
  • Diego Alcazar: come on, like you didn't think the same thing!
  • Cameron Webber: he did stare at the candles at Emma's birthday party very intently.

And he is far, far smarter than most people in Port Charles, so being a criminal mastermind isn't really out of the realm of possibility. It goes without saying that he would quickly become my favorite supervillain of all time.

The only noteworthy thing about today's General Hospital is how quickly I managed to fast-forward through it. But! To give credit where credit is due, there were two genuine laugh out loud moments.

Jerry: Carly is such a good fit for you and she makes the most ADORABLE babies [...] Please tell baby Josslyn that Uncle Jerry loves her very much.

Even frustrated soap viewers and poorly written villains can agree that fat-headed Joss is all kinds of cute!

Elsewhere, Diane asked Alexis to look over the suit being brought against Dante and Brenda. Because that is exactly what these two need: a TRIAL story that will play out onscreen every day for months or--God forbid-years. Anyway!

Alexis: Unfortunately, the more I read this, the more I agree that this case has merit. And you know what? To make matters worse, Brenda is a model. She's a celebrity. You and I both know that juries aren't sympathetic to people who have glamorous lives.
Diane: All right. Well, I am open to any and all suggestions.
Alexis: Well, make sure that you have twelve jurors who are fashion conscious and like Chachi hair and puppy dog eyes.

Alexis may get less screentime than background appliances, but at least the writers give her some quality quips when she's on-screen! CHACHI HAIR. That's art.


what if it's duke lavery????
helena cassadine?
some other cassadine
ric lansing?
lucy coe!

come on you all...it's so obvious!


Dr. Meadows?


Not-dead Bill Eckert. You heard it hear first. (Or nth however many times you have already heard this.)

That's a fucking awesome fat-headed baby.

I'm calling Brenda. Her being evil could explain why my eye starts twitching every time she's on screen.

(Actually, I called cranky hospital patient the first time he was on screen. Just waiting to be proven right.)

I have been ff'ing this show 88% of the time since 2001. Even tuning out for a few years between 2001-2005. And finally today after reading your post I see I have FINALLY missed something genuinely entertaining in all that massive fast forwarding...Chachi Hair!?!?!?!?!?!

What would I do w/out you? I can now giggle myself to sleep.

frisco jones!!!

Its James Franco's mother

I vote for Spinelli, because a) he hasn't been seen at Jason's for a while (I guess the actor was taping his pilot), and b) his fanatical devotion to Brenda can just be a cover for his pure hatred of her. OK, he's not old enough to have an adult son, but Guza can explain that away somehow I'm sure!

i vote for the bald guy with glasses is the balkan

A trial story line for Alexis and Diane is just what the doctor ordered. The Chachi line was great and thrown off like it was nothing. It looks like Hoffman is one of the lawyers from Diane's home office. That would be great.

However, the best line of the previous day's show was Jason explaining Sonny to Dante.

Jason: That's what he does. Buys her things. He bought her a cow pasture once.

Dante: A cow pasture?

Jason: Well, it was a field with cows in it. I don't know if it was a cow pasture.

How he delivered that line with a straight face is impossible to fathom. They must have had to stop tape with the cast and crew breaking up so bad. We had to rewind it twice it was so funny.

Balkan? Mayor Floyd.

Balkan = Alan Quartermaine's long lost evil twin.

How about Mike? He had a secret Russian son who was obsessed with Brenda just like his other son, Sonny. Mike's been running his evil empire from behind the grease pit at Kelly's.

Lucy's duck: Sigmund*

*I know the Balkan's already been revealed, but a girl can still dream.

Hahahahaha, sumb*tch! I knew it was the old man whose name I couldn't bother to remember! Anywho, you're the only other person I've seen online (granted, I haven't looked far) that saw it.

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