Trial of the Century! Or, You Know, the Day.

Whichever comes first.

So first we got Jesse Vasquez, D.A., otherwise known as the man who totally ruined Andrea Zuckerman as a character on Beverly Hills, 90210. Well, okay, to be fair it might have been more that they wrote a "challenges of raising a baby when you're still just kids yourselves!" storyline for actors who looked to be in their forties at the time, but whatever. Jesse sucked and he was rude to Dylan McKay, love of my life.

There won't be forgiveness anytime soon, Vasquez! Think again!

But I digress. (Which is totally unlike me!)

Speaking of Sonny's super-exciting trial in which they'll probably totally prove that Sonny's guilty and send him to prison for the rest of his life (Right? We're all dying to see if that happens, right? Oh, the suspense!), just a quick note to the GH directing team: there are a number of GH-only viewers bristling at the introduction of the OLTL crossover characters. Eventually they'll be integrated into the show enough that they'll be taken as any other new character -- on their own merits, some will hate them and some will love them. But a hint? If you want the character of Starr Manning to win any viewers over, stop letting her make this face.

It's odd that a simple facial expression can make a character wholly unsympathetic but I assure you, it can! The perma-snarl is not doing the eldest Manning child any favors.

Fortunately they really sped through the trial since it's not really the point, as we all know Sonny didn't do it (our first clue being the fact that he was accused of it), and they did so to get to what is clearly the main event:

Kate! Connie! This should at least be good for some entertainment. I'm looking forward to her testimony mostly because the only times I've enjoyed this whole "Connie" alter is when she's not doing the Soap D.I.D. standard of emerging and immediately attempting to dry-hump the nearest male. Granted this has been rare, and she still could full well wrap a leg around Jesse Vasquez, D.A., but I'm hoping this gets contained to some hilarious testimony antics.

 Now I'm going to need to beg.

Please please please please please don't do this. Please do not go the romantic route with Luke and Anna! Please! I'm enjoying watching their friendship develop (despite the show's implication that they have been besties forever which, of course, we know is not the case -- so I'm pretending this is meant to be the forging of friendship bonds rather than the falling-back into them). But no way no how should they ever date. Ever. Ever. Did I mention ever?

However please do continue to let Heather make Luke squirm!

Robin Mattson has just been killing it since her return. She makes a delicious meal out of every scene she's in. And instead of isolating her opposite just one or two characters, they're really letting her dole out her special brand of crazy. I can't wait till she gets to the rest of the town (dull as Jason often is, his reaction shots to abject lunacy are always worth the price of admission), but for now, Sam's got to contend with her:

Yikes! And Heather has conveniently shown up right in the middle of Sam's latest paternity test, and I do believe we all know full well that Ron Carlivati will not be able to resist making that a total non-coincidence. (Which is cool and fun and all, Ron, but can we put in a request to actually get the DNA test stuff cleared up before, like, the series finale? [Which is now farther away than we thought and will hopefully be eternally far away, of course. Knock on wood!] Because that would rock. Thanks.)

Because obviously Sam will not get the results she's hoping for since they laid it on so thick with the tinkly sentimental music during the sonogram yesterday:

Soaps don't have happy-moment scenes for the sake of happy moments, of course. Happy-moment scenes exist just to make the shitstorm around the corner all that much more of a fall. (Although really, don't get me started on Jason being the adoring daddy-to-be when he gave up his last child to protect him from the danger of his job, while for this one he has not for a second considered [a] doing the same thing or [b] you know, leaving that job. Why does this child not deserve the same consideration? This man is the moral center of the show why again?) (I'll stop there 'cause we'd be here all day.)

In brief... last night I went to an OLTL charity auction. I met some fun OLTL people and got away with some cool loot (my favorite: the architect's floor plans for the Lord cabin), but most importantly I got to see this poster in person:

It was just as beautiful to behold close up, y'all. Every bit as beautiful. And I would have bid on the thing too if I'd been able to fit it in a cab, but that wasn't going to happen. That's a little dream I'll just continue to hold in my heart...

Happy Friday the 13th, y'all!

Comments

[guilty pleasure]

Actually Louise, Andrea and Jesse were both in college and their characters were already legal adults and maybe in their early twenties when they had their baby. But it was kinda weird seeing Andrea's husband from BH 90210 (original recipe) playing a D.A. on GH!

[Louise]

guilty pleasure, Andrea was allegedly 19 when she had Hannah, while Jesse was in law school. I didn't mean they were actually minors, I just meant it was sold as a "too young!" kind of story and looked so silly since the actors looked middle-aged!

[soapbaby]

Oh Louise! How I envy your getting to attend an auction of OLTL items! If my family wouldn't have me committed, I'd totally go for the huge-ass portrait of Roxy Balsom from the Foxy Roxy's set. LOL.

Regarding GH, I wish Connie to emerge on the witness stand. That would be awesome and make the trial exciting to watch. Was it just me or didn't it feel like the prosecutor got a lot more lines than Alexis? The actor was very good.

An actor not very good was Kristen Alderson. I hate to dislike the poor girl but the only way she expresses hurt and anger is seething through gritted teeth. On the plus side, I liked her hair and blouse. And where was Blair? It's the murder trial of her grandchild! Instead of Kassie DePaiva being misused in her few episodes when Starr got to PC, she should be used for a few episodes here!

Olivia and Steve continue to annoy. I wish Heather would let crazy out on them. I love Finola Hughes, so seeing her is a joy but enough of Anna with Luke. Tony Geary does humor very well but I find him tiresome. Is it time for his annual sabbatical? Speaking of tiresome, JaSam was on...ZZZ. Now, Dr. Lee in on Sam's lie. Great. I hope Heather eats Sam alive! Perhaps, Heather will learn of Sam's baby paternity issues but so many of the current GH stories feel like recycled OLTL stories (i.e. Sam's paternity lies/Natalie's paternity lies; Connie's DID/Jessica's DID; Heather's crazy mama/Irene Manning's crazy mama.)

I want Heather to do as much damage as possible to Sam, Luke, Steve and Olivia. I hate those characters so much. Robin Mattson is totally schooling the cast! I wish Heather (and Anna) would mix it up with more of the characters in PC. Like Heather should be confronted by Tracy or Edward, see Liz. Anna should have scenes with Mac and, perhaps, Maxie.

[marz]

Heather was crazy when Irene Manning was still dead from cancer.

Envy green over auction attendance, Louise.

[MD]

I think the ruination of Andrea Zuckerman came when her hair went from curly to straight, but I digress. Which is totally unlike me.

That said, totally with you on the who do I have to sleep with to make sure that Luke and Anna don't get all romantical train. Cause I'll do it. I swear.

[Bourgeois Nerd]

I must say, I actually enjoyed the trial stuff. Best courtroom scenes GH has had in years. Good editing, writing, directing, and performing. Alexis and the DA actually seemed like competent lawyers. Zippy pacing. And Connie/Kate should be a hoot. The ultimate verdict isn't in doubt, but it was still an entertaining bit. I'd credit RC's law background, but considering some of the errant legal nonsense on OLTL... (Though, to be fair, the scenes themselves were usually very good, especially since HBS and FL play lawyer really, really well, as does NLG.)

[Bourgeois Nerd]

Oh, and RC definitely loves his inaccurate dnay tests far too much for Sam's not to be tampered with. It'll end up being Jason's in a while.

[Kermitklein]

I'm not really bothered by how fast the trial is going simply because it's a weak trial based on a gun with no prints as well as no serial number found in Kate's office so of course Sonny did it and we only had to endure one minute of Starr on the stand and didn't have to endure minute after minute of the actress trying to display a dramatic breakdown on the stand. Dare I hope that RC/FV...someone has realized Jeez this child can't do a dramatic scene to save her life so now this is the start of them limiting her trying to display her dramatic acting.

I too don't want a Anna/Luke hook up. I know that they are trying to make the character of Luke likeable by using a likeable character like Anna as his way of helping her through the death of her child, but for a romance. Yea no. I kind of like the Anna/John scenes and see chem between them.

Heather is good times. I want her to annihilate Olivia. I feel like she so overstepped her boundaries with going to Ewen and wanting him to do a psych eval on Heather. Maybe I would be more on Olivia side if she didn't base majority of the reason she wants Heather locked back up because Heather didn't kiss her behind and what Heather did when Steven was a baby.

As for Heather possibly changing Sam's paternity test, I hope they don't even tease that. It's not even necessary considering that the basis of Sam and Jason's problem is not 'if Franco is the father, Jason can't raise this baby' it's more about the lies and secrecy that Sam is telling. Keep the baby Franco because I'm curious if Sam can actually love her child when it's not Jason's considering that she doesn't want a child unless it's Jason's. That's been her mantra since she's been harping about having a child since last year and for me it would just deserts since they went out of their way of killing Jake. I.E. The street that Elizabeth's house ended up being the busiest street in Port Charles with pot holes, no street lights, and no side walks even though the whole basis of Emily finding Elizabeth the house and Patrick/Robin choosing to be neighbors to Elizabeth was because the house was on the outskirts of town on a none busy street. For me it would be the ultimate in-your-face to Frons that the baby is not Jason's.

What I'm hoping for is that we have no more sonogram scenes or doctor check up scenes simply because I really don't feel like having to endure the "do you want to know if it's a boy or a girl".."no, no do you want to know if it's a boy or a girl"..it's starting to fall along the same lines of their old countless convos of "do you want to get married"..."no do you want to get married"...and the ever tiring of "do want to have a baby"..."no do you want to have a baby". I just can't. Once again, this is not the first time she has been pregnant and this is not the first time he's had a kid so these countless "the wonder of pregnancy" scenes that they have like it's both their first time going through this is really annoying.

And even though she wasn't on yesterday, I'm going to put this out there. Rebecca Herbst to me have very beautiful hair. It's long, it's thick, and we have seen through the years that she has been on the show the different ways to style her hair so I'm wondering who in the hell decided to style her hair like that. And whoever it is needs to have Tabatha Coffy to come bitch slap the hell out of them.

[BL]

Can you share more about the charity auction? What other cool loot did you get? I'd love to see photos.

ITA about Jesse Vasquez

[soapbaby]

@kermitklein: Your posts are always SO spot-on but I had to repeat based on the mention of Tabitha Coffy committing violence!:

"And even though she wasn't on yesterday, I'm going to put this out there. Rebecca Herbst to me have very beautiful hair. It's long, it's thick, and we have seen through the years that she has been on the show the different ways to style her hair so I'm wondering who in the hell decided to style her hair like that. And whoever it is needs to have Tabatha Coffy to come bitch slap the hell out of them."

[Elizabeth]

Keep the baby Franco because I'm curious if Sam can actually love her child when it's not Jason's considering that she doesn't want a child unless it's Jason's.

Sam's never going to be my favorite character for a variety of reasons, but not wanting to have a child with anyone other than her husband seems fairly reasonable. And we know she's capable of loving a child with a different biological father, since that's already happened. This, however, would be the child of her rapist, and I really couldn't blame her for having a harder time with it if it came to that.

Though I doubt it will, since I agree with Louise -- never trust the first set of DNA results on a soap. Especially one written by RC.

[C]

Loving Heather/Robin Mattson. Although you think she'd be playing the continued crazy a little closer to the vest (I also hate that Olivia is right about anything).

But I am very much enjoying her toying with Sam.

[marz]

"Now, Dr. Lee in on Sam's lie. Great."

Dr Lee is bound by her oath not to reveal anything her patient tells her. And Sam is not lying to Jason about the baby-she's waiting until she has all the facts. She doesn't know the truth yet. If after she gets the facts and doesn't tell Jason, then it's lying. But Dr Lee is simply honoring Dr/Patient confidentiality. Under Guza and GW, it was rarely honored, so I can see why it's almost not believed when a medical character does it.

[soapbaby]

Hey marz! I understand and agree with you about Dr. Lee being bound by doctor/patient confidentiality but my point was Sam is steadily expanding her lies. Her lies to Jason make no sense. I sided with her when she lied about Robin because he was recovering from brain surgery. Now, he's up and better. He already knows Franco's involved in the paternity and in his life in a big way. I think Jason has the right to know that Franco's his twin brother. But, "handling" each other by deceiving one another is the M.O. for Jason and Sam. LOL.

[julie]

i'm sorry but skank threatened to abort sonny's kid to get her way. she terrorized liz and cake, got a teenage rape victim a strooker, etc. this woman is not maternal at all. sure she loved baby no name after it died and she could use it as a crutch and keep jason w/her.
and she did say that maybe it would be better if she lost the kid when she didn't even know who the daddy was,b/c it would be easier.
she should have gone to a dr and taken the morning after pill, heck she could have all sorts of yuck if she was even raped and given them to jason.can't you get tma pill otc now?

[Anne]

Sam isn't my favorite character, but I don't see how she's ever indicated that she doesn't want a child unless it's Jason's. If memory serves, when she onsidered abortion she was in a pretty stressful situation, what with both Jax and Sonny staking claims to her uterus. Once the pregnancy was under way, she was committed to that baby. Wanting to be a mother has been a consistent desire for Sam ever since she lost her baby. I don't think that Sam and Jason should be parents, but the show clearly disagrees. When Sam first considered that Franco might be the father, she asked Jason if he could handle it. She never - to my mind - sounded as though she had a moment's doubt as to whether she could love this baby.

[Anne]

And I wish the show had let Sam spend MORE time deciding whether to go forward with the pregnancy if paternity was in doubt. I felt that they sidestepped really having the two of them talk about what they would do if the first test they took indicated that Jason wasn't the father.

[LadyBug]

Louise, I am so envious that you were able to attend the OLTL auction. I miss my soap!

Soap trials are usually more about the witnesses than any thing else.

Sam clearly told Jason that they would not make it as a couple when Jake was a baby if they did not have his child. That speaks volumes, at least to me. If Sam wanted a baby, she didn't have to wait on Jason! This woman hit pay dirt when she plopped her pregnant butt on Jason's couch. Sam could have gone to a pharmacist to get the morning after pill or even to a private OB/GYN if she didn't want to go to the ER.

My preference for the whole maybe "rape" story was for Sam to really struggle with terminating Franco's baby once Dr. Lee made it clear there would be no more babies because of her uterus procedure. There was no need to make Jason and Franco fraternal twins...yawn. It should have been a Sam story where she has to decide to terminate, raise the baby or give it up for adoption. Sam should have also been racked with guilt since she let Franco walk out of Jason's penthouse when she had her gun pointed at his crazy head!

[Connie]

Baby no-name had a name and both Sam and Jason loved her before she died further she didn't need to use the baby as a crutch to keep Jason he was staying on his own free will because he feel in love with her. I think anyone would question rather or not they want to keep their rapist baby, plus I have never heard Sam state she didn't want a baby unless Jason was the father.

What lies are Sam telling Jason especially since he isn't asking her any questions about Franco being his brother, if anything Sam is keeping information from him until she feels reasonable sure to present it to him. And for the record this is Sam and Jason first child together even through they went through this already with baby Lila why can't they act all giddy with this one also.

[eygirl33]

Sam doesn't have a maternal bone in her body. This is the same woman that hired armed gunman to terrorize a newborn, a toddler and their mom. She's done many despicable things since she first landed in PC.

[bethie]

Wow, I'm no fan of Sam, but hey. . .I thought only Sonny/Jason bashing was an olympic event this year??? Colour me confused ;)

I was disappointed that tame Kate took the stand and not crazy connie, and also disappointed in Carly who with one breath was telling Johnny that she made some awful mistakes letting Michael and Morgan be exposed to the violence that is their father's life, but in the next, listening to Johnny as he told her that he'd never bring any violence to her kids. Carly never learns.

Loved the exchange between three acting greats (and I'm going to include AG here cuz he's been bringing it since the arrival of Anna but more so Heather) Anyway, I (also) digress. . . the scene with Tracey Luke and Anna with Anna delivering those snippy asides was terrific. Give us more o' that!!

What I wanna know is when is St. Jason going to figure out that if Sonny was shot in his left arm, and driving (presumably) an American made car, it would be pretty dexterous of him to shoot out the left window of the car, with his right hand, while driving with his . . .what. . .knees???

[bethie]

Also, as I said before I've been watching old OLTL epi's and Starr Manning, though incredibly cute and a very funny child actor, she has always made that face. I think it's her "go to" expression of confusion, bewilderment, annoyance, anger, vengeance and lots of other stuff. On a positive note, she wasn't screechy, and her hair was pretty and her blouse really brought out her eyes :)

[Kermitklein]

Anne, by Sam's actions, she's indicated many of times that she doesn't want a baby unless it's Jason's. A consistent desire to have a baby. Um, no. When she was with Lucky, not one time did wanting to have a baby come out of her mouth. When Sam was alone, she never indicated she wanted a baby. A woman that has always desired a baby to me would do what Robin did. Whether Patrick was on board or not, Robin wanted to have a baby. Went around town to find a sperm donor. That's a woman that wants a baby. However, with Sam, there was no mention of wanting a baby with Lucky, when she was alone, there was no mention of wanting a baby, however when she saw Jason with Jake after the bus accident, once again she started the baby mantra, had her procedure, and still was going to wait on Jason on whether she was going to have a baby even though many of times that he was unsure on whether he ever wanted to be a father.. I can show you many of clips of Sam talking about having a baby 'as long as Jason's the father'. And on top of that, I can also find you the you tube clip of her having doubts about loving that baby if it's Franco's.

[Kermitklein]

Bethie, Jason has already figured out that Sonny couldn't have possibly been driving the car and shooting at the tires, that's why he's on Sonny's side in believing that Sonny didn't do it. The real question is why haven't any one else thought of this.

[Elizabeth]

Just so I'm clear on how this works... if a woman isn't interested in being a single mother via sperm donor, or isn't rushing to get impregnated by every man she dates, then her desire to be a mother somehow isn't sincere?

(And wasn't Sam infertile when she was with Lucky and when she was single before getting back with Jason? So what should she have been doing to prove her sincerity then anyway?)

I mean, I think she's stupid to be lying to him again right now and I think she's made plenty of bad choices in the past. But I really, honestly don't understand what could possibly be controversial about a woman only wanting to have a baby under certain circumstances, with a partner she loves. Or expressing a moment of doubt about her ability to love a baby that was the product of a rape.

[Kermitklein]

So, not getting my point. I'm not saying that she didn't want to get pregnant or have a child with Lucky. What I'm saying is while with Lucky through conversations as well as while alone, she didn't voice anything about wanting to be a mother in conversations during those times. And so what if she was infertile. Last time I checked, that wasn't the only way to have a baby. That's the point I'm making. The only time that Sam has expressed wanting to have a child is when she was with Jason. What I'm saying is that from late 2007 after the break up with Jason, all the way to 2010 there was no mention that I can recall out of Sam's mouth about this great desire to have a baby. And I really I have no problem if she expressed a moment of doubt about having this baby. Any woman would. In fact that's the reason I want this baby to remain Franco's because I would like to see, knowing that this is not Jason's child how she handles the situation since for so many years she's had her mind set on just having Jason's child.

[Elizabeth]

I guess I'm not getting your point, no. Sure, while she was infertile she could have expressed interest in adopting a child with a man she was casually dating, or as a single mother who works long, unpredictable hours as PI. But the fact that she didn't doesn't really prove anything other than not everyone who wants to be a parent wants to adopt, and not everyone who wants a baby is ready for single parenthood. And since the subject of her infertility was consistently portrayed as extremely painful to her, I don't really find it surprising that she didn't talk about it a lot when she felt it was a moot point. *shrugs*

In any case, to get back to the post -- Louise, I'm super jealous you got to see the Vicker man poster in person! Was it just as beautiful as I've always imagined?

[Kermitklein]

Yea, you're not getting my point and part of me feels like you're trying not to get my point, so we will agree to disagree with the fact that outside of her relationship with Jason, they never really sold Sam as a character that had a desire for a baby.

[marz]

Elizabeth, you really have to stop making sense all the time.

And yes, Sam was infertile after being shot. It took a medical treatment that was new and revolutionary for her to even have the slightest chance of being pregnant. (SOAPS!)

So, when she was with Lucky, there was no reason to long for a child, because she had been told she could not have one. And how devil damn dare she not want the child of a psychotic rapist. That should be every woman's dream...Where's my sarcasm emoticon?

[Anne]

Kermitklein, I get your point, but I specifically disagree with your conclusions. What I remember is that the one time that Sam and Jason tried to adopt, the teen mother changed her mind, and during the aftermath there was a scene in which they acknowledged that it would be very hard for people with their track records to adopt. I also remember that Sam was heartbroken after Manny shot her in the uterus and rendered her (supposedly) infertile. I also remember several scenes during that time in which the show dramatized Sam coming to terms with that, and periodic reflections of regret on her part for something she assumed she would never have afterwards. The show actually did that particular arc believably and well, I think. Finally, the option to have surgery that would restore her ability to get pregnant was offered after she reunited with Jason. I simply do not see how any of that means that Sam doesn't want a baby unless Jason is the father.