In Record Speed...

So since I fast-forward just about everything on B&B now that has anything to do with The Triangle of Doom, I actually miss some episodes in their entirety (well, okay, I see lots of quiet things happening very, very quickly). Early in the week, they seemed to hint at a possible romantic interest between Maya and Rick, which is actually something I think I could get behind. Maybe. It's certainly more interesting than Rick and Caroline, that's for sure!

Otherwise, this is really what it all amounted to:

I loved how Eric got into his bathrobe while Taylor was in the bathroom changing into the lingerie he designed for her. It was just so smarmy. But he's probably gotten some tips on how to romance Taylor from at least two of his sons. Maybe more? 

Apparently the number one tip was, "Just touch and move her hair. A lot. Don't actually kiss her or anything. Just look into her eyes way too intensely and smooth out her hair. Maybe move her hair behind her shoulders? Now smooth it again. Now maybe move it back in front of her shoulders. Now caress it. Now move the hair again."

Here's how Brooke felt about it:

Note to Brooke: if it's nighttime and you've let yourself into someone's home and you hear cheesy smooth jazz playing behind their bedroom door, you're probably not going to be super-psyched about what you find when you open that door.

Because Oliver is adorable, I did force myself to watch his scenes even though they were with Hope. I once didn't hate Hope (basically extended her the non-hate courtesy because she is the offspring of Deacon and Brooke), but this triangle has soured me on every single character involved and I pretty much seriously loathe them.

At any rate, because apparently everyone who meets Hope is just so taken, it turns out Oliver had once tattooed her name on his ankle.

This impressed Hope somehow. Not as much as, say, having six almost-weddings to the same dude in an 18-month period, but it impressed her nonetheless.

I can't figure out how she ever resisted this cutie and got sucked in the vortex of Douchenozzle. But she did, and I'm feeling no optimism that this is the start of a new chapter. Damn!

Comments

[John M]

Louise, you need to write a parody soap. I don't even watch B&B, but your recaps are divine.

[LadyBug]

Ewwww. Taylor and Eric? B&B is just so incestuous with everyone sleeping with ex-in-laws and step-children.

[Ziyal]

LMFAO @ all the hair touching. It's hilarious that they got interrupted by Brooke, of all people.

I was never Oliver's biggest fan, and I totally wouldn't be impressed by the tattoo considering it's the same symbol as the one on the necklace that Brooke wore which led to the Broliver boink. (obviously, it's because it means Hope, but I still find it icky!)

Thank you for covering B&B once again! And I agree, Rick and Caroline are all kinds of boring together.

[LadyBug]

There was a time when I liked Brooke/Ridge/Taylor before both women started effing the same men! You could always count on a classy Taylor versus a sexpot Brooke, but now both women are uber sleazy.

[Elizabeth Kerri Mahon]

I think that Hope should give Oliver another chance. After all, her sister Bridget married Nick again, after he was married to Brooke, and Taylor and slept with Katie. Oliver has only slept with Brooke, so he still has many more of Hope's relatives to go through.

[Lisa]

But sleeping with Brooke is like crossing the county line. All the guys do it.

[My Garage Guys LLC]

That scene behind the bed doesn't look appropriate for their age. :) Just saying.