How We Met Sam's Father

This isn't fair of me at all, I realize, because we are precisely at the beginning of a story here and it's ludicrous to feel that questions should be answered both immediately and straightforwardly and also because I am in a foul mood and cannot be objective about anything at all (I am a hot mess, you guys. Literally--it's basically paralyzingly hot out and will remain this way until the end of time and it's so humid that my once meticulously blown out hair went all twisty nutty the second I stepped out of the house. I look semi-deranged!) but I haven't been called fair in at least...ever, so I feel comfortable saying that the start of Sam's Long-Lost Father storyline has me side-eyeing my television set*.

I mean...right?

Sam: Who is my father?
Alexis: I don't know his name.
Sam: What?!
Alexis: The reason I never told you who your father was is because I don't know.

That's not exactly the vibe I've ever gotten before--although I suppose that it is difficult to really pick up on a vibe when the prior writing regimes expressed little more than disinterest and dismissiveness and disgustedness at the very idea of giving this story actual screentime (and at the very idea of Alexis as a character). I always thought that Alexis knew exactly who Sam's father was and that he was an awful, terrible person who was possibly (probably?) related to her. I'm not saying that I was hoping for a creepy Cassadine incest saga; I only anticipated that a creepy Cassadine incest saga was coming. Is it just me? Have I invented this elaborate subtext in my head? Is there another General Hospital that plays in my mind?

Nancy Lee Grahn, it must be said, completely blew me away in these scenes and I'm sure that she will continue to do so as we see the fallout from this revelation (and the eventual random reunion between Alexis and her one-night hookup who will, for some reason, coincidentally wind up in Port Charles because it's totally a small world after all. Again.). And I'm excited that after YEARS of wondering about it (YEARS! We've been questioning Sam's paternity for YEARS! For seven years! Almost a decade!) we may be getting some answers, even though they might be dragged out with time-wasting vagueness and half-truths. I mean, that's kind of soap law.

But there's no excuse for the Ouija board.

Molly: I have something I want to ask him. Is that okay?
Rafe: Sure.
Molly: Mr. Kovich, are you still with us?
Rafe Senior, via the board game that made an appearance at every girl's elementary school sleepover, albeit a brief appearance because it usually freaked people out: Yes.
Molly: Do you know who my sister Sam's father is?

Why on earth would Rafe Senior know who Sam's father is? When you die and proceed to whatever version of the afterlife you believe in, do you become psychic and all-knowing? If you are all-knowing, are you limited to sending messages through Ouija boards to pass your knowledge on or are there other avenues?

(It turns out that Rafe Senior DOES know everything including the paternity of this complete stranger. His name starts with a J, which does absolutely nothing to narrow it down, so thanks for that Ouija Rafe)

*Other recipients of my half-asleep, half-sane side-eye?

Spinelli, for being literally the worst detective to ever go undercover.

Ava's Assistant: What happened was so horrible.
Spinelli: It was horrible indeed. In your opinion, what was the most horrible aspect of what happened between Ava and Dr. Clay?

Cool as a cucumber, Spin. You really come across as the type of person who has engaged in conversations with other humans.

And Sonny and Connie for their limitless well of ew.

Connie: After everything I did to you, including this last chapter when I told you I couldn't be with you after you waited for me. You suffered with me. You were the one who gave me strength to heal.
Sonny: I love you. I'll always love you. Nothing's going to change that.
The entire United States population in unison: Um...ew.

Let's all remember Connie passionately listing Sonny's virtues and wonderfulness when he officially takes up with Olivia. We can all laugh at her pain then, together. Bonding!

Comments

[Cindy]

You are not alone in thinking Sam's father was some horrible person and that Alexis had semi-blocked the whole thing from her mind. And yep, I even expected Cassidine incest. Anything except "I don't know his name."

[MelP]

No, Mallory, you're not alone in thinking that either of the Cassidine boys could've been the father. She was extremely close with Stefan, but I just didn't get that vibe.

Now Stavros, she was just plain afraid of him, and my thought was that it was either a rape or a bad seduction & then she saw the crazy side & tried to hide from him. the fact that she was so afraid of Helena & hid the baby just added to my thought that Stavros could've been the daddy.

[Deprived]

Kelly Monaco is such a horrible and sucky actress. Uggghhhh! Nancy deserves a better actress to play her daughter. Is a wooden broom available, because I'm pretty sure it'd do a better job.

And I hereby officially lame KeMo for Easton's woodeness when he's opposite her,because when he's opposite Maura West he practically hums with energy. Which might actually matter if they weren't both newbies and if I cared. Just thought I'd mention that Kelly Monaco drags down everyone she works with. Even those who were already down in the slump with her.

Oh, and also: worst, most boring story they could have come up with for Alexis baby daddy. God, I hope she was lying.

[LadyBug]

Meh. I don't give a rats poop about Sam's Daddy. Where are Liz's parents after being on the show since 1997? Where are the Hardy/Webber characters since, you know, GH is celebrating 50 years on air and Audrey/RA has retired, which leaves Liz and her two boys as the only legacy characters on the show. \

RC seems to be stuck in the 1980's story line wise, so why not bring on Liz's parents even if the show has to recast Dr. Jeff Webber. Speaking of Hardy/Webber characters, what is the point of bringing on Felix and Taylor if you're not going to tie them to the Hardy/Webber family by making them Nurse Tommy Hardy Jr. and his bratty teenage sister, Taylor? Come on! Liz could totally relate to bratty Taylor (except for the teenage ONS with TJ!) since she gave Audrey nothing but sass and smoking cigarettes sixteen years ago!

[Blue]

Could it be that dead Rafe Senior started to spell out "Jerry Jacks" on the ouija board?

[Janet B.]

I watched Port Charles & I didn't know that Rafe Sr. was now dead, but then again he was an angel so was he ever even "alive" in the first place. Can an angel die? My mind wanders when Molly & Rafe are on my screen.

I'm sure we will see at least one or two new male characters on the show very soon one of whom will be Sam's father. I agree w/LadyBug on who Felix & Taylor should have been. That would be a great use of history. Maybe writers/producers thing we've forgotten certain characters, but we haven't.

One word to Spinelli, the worst private eye ever: Smooooth!

[Barbara]

As I watched the BIG reveal I was disappointed that we did not get the actual father's name but this is a soap so I am not sure why I was surprised. The more I think about though I think Alexis does know and decided to lie about it. I still believe in true soap fashion there is more to this story.

[oltlgirl]

Why would they even bother to bring it up if she doesn't even know his name - there must be more to the story. (Please!) I'm thinking a young Julian Jerome knocked her up....he fits in the with the "bring back the 80's" storylines & would be related to Ava....making her related to Sam as well.

I don't remember if he died or not, but when does that stop anyone on a soap!

[Jennyp]

I always suspected Stavros, Valentin, or maybe Stefan. Because, as she mentioned yesterday, Alexis didn't know she was a full Cassidine when she was young, and I thought either a)Stavros or Valentine attacked her or b) her and Stefan fell in love before they know how closely they were related. I heard that GH just cast B&Bs former Storm Logan, so whoever he plays is probably the dad. Still a let down!

[Lisa Houserman]

I think it's Julian Jerome as well, in terms of the father.

[TIsh]

isn't Julian Jerome --Lucas Jones' birth father???? If that is the route GH is going please bring Bobbie and Lucas back!! Lucas and Felix could date?? Agreed Felix and Taylor should have been Hardy's that would have been great use of history.

BTW can anyone explain why Morgan is living at the Q mansion? Does he have 2 homes in Port Charles??

And why is Olivia anywhere near Sonny?? He shot her son at point blank range in the chest-- I could never forgive nor forget that

[Fleur]

Riiiight?!!

And haha, I looove the title of this post.

I thought the one thing we knew about Sam's father--the only thing?--was that he was "evil" and Alexis didn't want to talk about it. Ten years (or however long Kelly Monaco's been on GH now) is a long time "not to talk about it" for the lead up to be...

"I uh...never knew his name."

Nancy Lee Grahn was AMAZING with the material they gave her. I love when they give her things to do. I feel like a whole show could be just about Alexis Davis (a one-hour drama a-la the Good Wife?) because Nancy is that compelling.

But I won't lie. Ten years of not knowing (and I wasn't even watching the whole of that ten years, I just came back to GH circa 09 or 10? after a multi-year absence..so for me three or four years of not knowing) is a LONG time of not knowing for the answer to be: "I don't know." Haha! Was a bit like a balloon deflating, I won't lie. All that and *this* was the answer the writers gave us? In GH soap opera ethics, this seems not such a big deal.

I too suspected some weird Cassadine incest story up to this point. Oh well, at least Nancy Lee Grahn might get some decent screentime out of this.

(ps: I can't wait to hear your thoughts on Franco's brain trauma/identity confusion. Oh my gosh, this is either a white whale that's about to sink the ship that is GH or a brilliant idea that saves us all from the misery of future Franco based story lines. I am so fond of Roger H and want to see him on screen, but the Franco material they're subjecting him to is just...I don't even know what show I'm watching anymore)

[Fleur]

@LadyBug, I do find it hilarious/sad that we have never, ever, ever seen Liz's parents. Ever. They've been missionary doctors in eastern Europe (or wherever) for forever. Why even give her parents if we never see them!

Of course they've never managed to write either of her siblings in a particularly interesting way either, which is a shame. I would love for Rebecca Herbst to have more screentime.

[Dirk]

The first thing my boyfriend said when we watched Alexis' confession was "she's lying because his identity is so awful she can't bear to tell Sam."

[Em]

I am happy for two Alexis storylines in a row. I will take what I can get. I adore Nancy and think she could give lessons to other cast mates.
Also, every once in a while I have to state alou my desire that they bring Rick Hearst, as an under/mis-used talent from long ago. Hearing mentioning her dad made me miss the actor (although Rafe's misunderstanding that Molly and Sam shared a dad made me want to vom -- the Sam/Ric story was gross enough as it was. Thanks, Rafe.).

[Ziyal]

I love that Alexis is getting a storyline, but I so wanted it to be a Cassadine incest story because we need more Cassadines, and her not knowing his name is just freaking LAME!!

[LadyBug]

I'm getting really annoyed at the lack of Hardy/Webber's on the show. Audrey would probably run for the heels if she had to deal with teenage Taylor's ONS with TJ fallout...LOL.

[Cara]

To those who keep guessing Jerry is Sam's dad.. remember that Jerry and Sam MADE OUT in her hot tub. Sam also was introduced as Jax's lover, and he'd be her uncle. GH may be dark, but I think sex with her uncle and making out with her dad is too twisted.

[Ms Chicklet]

The hot but (tm TWoP) saw a lot of action.