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« The Not So Secret Keeper | Main | If I May Be Frank...Or Franco, Rather »

November 07, 2013

In A Word...Ew

I could be saying, loudly and accompanied by a pretty epic grimace, that "ew" about SO many things on today's episode of General Hospital, because so much of it was gross and upsetting on a visceral level.

Every second Sonny and Olivia shared together, for example, was stomach-churning, and that isn't even related to the actual content of their conversation, which I am sort of hazy about on account of not being able to listen over my internal monologue shouting "HE SHOT YOUR SON IN THE CHEST!". It was something about Morgan, I gather? And Olivia just looked at him with these big moon eyes the entire time and it just gutted me. Or made me want to gut myself, rather. And what about when he lunged at the DA (who...can I be frank? Was he a contest winner? I don't think he delivered a single word believably, let alone an entire line) all crazy-eyed and violent?


"I've shot my wife in the head, sir, and I've shot my son in the chest and I blew up my daughter and I am basically terrible in every conceivable way, but a wire, sir? I would never do something so depraved! How dare you?!"


Michael and Kiki's confrontation of Ava over her Jerome lies was also gross, because of Kiki's wild-eyed facial contortions (the nostril-flaring! Ew!) and "Talk to the hand" gesticulations as well as Michael's completely unearned smugness.

Michael: We know the truth, Ava. You're connected to the Jerome crime family. Your brother is Julian Jerome.

So patronizing. I clapped my hands in delight at Ava and Morgan's responses.

Morgan: Dude, even if that's true, so what? We're dad's kids, that doesn't mean we're in the mob.

Ava: I'm sure you want to protect your criminal father's crooked business. I respect that.


Then you had Carly and Ava's brief catfight over Morgan, where Carly spat out the phrase "Cradle-robbing whore" and Ava made the most over-the-top and ridiculous sex-kitten faces this side of the adult film industry; an ominous (and long--very long) conversation between TJ and Shawn about stuff and things that basically has me worried--or it would be worry if I cared, which I don't--that TJ is going to die. All of it was ew. All of it.

But OH MY GOD, nothing in this world is grosser than Carly and Franco mooning over each other like love struck seventh graders.


I...I never knew that two human beings smiling at each other could cause me such discomfort and also rage, but here I am, nauseous and angry. Oh my god, when Carly was all twinkly and charming telling him he had a gift? And how he made sad panda eyes at her and Derek? I am literally (not literally but can we just go with it? Hyperbole trumps grammar here!) breaking out into hives just remembering it.


Todd 2.0 needs to go, ASAP.

They should just fire (almost) everyone and reboot the show simply as "Anna and Tracy." Naturally, Dr. O would play the scheming neighbor, and Diane can have a small recurring role, maybe as the town slut. They can de-camp Heather and she can stop by every now and then for a BLT.

Yes!! Some others would have to stay of course, but tops on my getting-rid-of list: sonny, carly, franco, olivia, kiki, luke, felix, sabrina, any teens who are not molly, brad, jerry, sean (or is it shawn, I don't care enough to pay attention), heather (she wore out her welcome a few escapes back), sure there are more...

The whole art show thing left me flat. I dislike the Franco character, and I'm beginning to tire of Heather's antics.

When Sonny repeated having not worn a wire ever, and not making any deals, how I wished someone was there to bring up his deal with Lily's father that kept him out jail (the closest he's ever really been to doing time). By saying this he was trying to show he was a stand up guy. While his his deal with Rivera wasn't with the cops, he ended up reneging on the it, which put Brenda's life in danger, and ultimately got Lily and his unborn child killed. Hardly a stand up guy in his world.

I miss AJ.

I can't believe that I am back to completely disliking Michael. I used to before he came back as Drew Garret (I think that was his name) and the current actor. Kiki and this whole storyline has made me dislike him again. Self-righteousness shows that nurture>nature on this show.

Ugggh, Olivia. Why is she there and butting her nose in everywhere. Why has nobody called her out for it? Don't get me started on her or Sonny.

I didn't like Todd & Carly, and this version is just as bad. They have yet to convince me of any chemistry.

I'm loving the Britt, Dr. Obrecht, Faison family dynamic.

Sidenote: I love that the single The Wire reference was made by two of the only three black character. Yay.

I miss AJ ALOT. I want Robin and Patrick back together NOW and for them to write Robin actually fighting for her family back, and oh yeah HAVE PATRICK HAVE A DAMN BRAIN AGAIN, and most important for them to kill off or get rid of in anyway shape or form the characters of: SABRINA, OLIVIA, KIKI, and MORGAN ( well maybe morgan can stay a while cause even though he's a total selfish brat and least he has a backbone). I don't get why they continue with this crap that's not working and don't get me started on the whole Franco and Carly crap were even though the guy is a SERIAL KILLER she still has feelings for him and thinks he's better than AJ??? crap ugh. What pisses me off more than anything right now is not even the crap they showed today but the fact that they are writing Robin's return and scrubs story in general the way they are even though Kimberly's coming back has given them the highest ratings in a very long time they still write the twit as a teenage princes that can do no wrong and continue the crap they are doing to scrubs. Ugh wtf. well at least Kimberly is back, I'm liking Britt more and more and her crazy parents and Anna and Robert make this stupid hot mess watchable.

I miss AJ too. I lament the return of the mob. Luke puts me to sleep (literally, but I've always had that problem). Heather wore out her welcome with me way back when she was after Todd. If they'd get rid of Sonny, Luke, Heather, the teens, Carlos, Sabrina, maybe they could afford to have the people I actually care about on my screen.

Totally enjoying Silas now though.

It looks there is a tiny mans face growing out of Carly's head in the above screenshot! I found that way more entertaining than the show....

I stopped watching gh then with the return of Robin-- I started to DVR the show again--- ugh... very few things make me like the show or care about the show! I am totally into a Tracy and Anna show-- let's keep Robert, Duke, Mac, Felicia, Monica, Aj (boy do I miss him), Liz, Patrick (but only if he starts to act like he is a doctor with a brain), Robin, Emma--- that is about it....

I truly think TPTB have forgotten that mostly woman (and mothers at that watch GH). As I mother-- I don't understand how Olivia can stand to be in the same room as Sonny-- HE SHOT HER SON IN COLD BLOOD!! Now if there was a twist and she was actually working with the cops to bring Sonny to justice for shooting her son in cold blood then I could be behind this whole "romance". Now Carly and Franco-- once again how could a mother even one as bad as Carly be making bedroom eyes with the man that arranged for HER SON'S RAPE!!! How-- I don't care how sorry he is --He arranged for Michael to be raped in prison. I hate the character of Franco --hate-- I will not watch him and frankly it is really turning me off to GH in general-- Franco is an awful character---Bring RH back once more as a new character love interest for Carly if TPTB are so hot to trot to get them together.

Ava Jerome-- not sure how I feel about the character but being Delia's Ryan daughter does score some brownie points with me... I loved Ryan's Hope. Can Delia come and visit? That might make me warm up to these characters.

I do love the Dr. O, Faison, Britt craziness that is good stuff...

You always hit the nail directly on the head. Ew just about sums up most of this show currently. How about the conversation where franco the rapist retconned non rapist talked to Carly about Derek sodomizing her son. Big time ew. And playing a love triangle with Derek who is old enough to be carly's father? More ew. And Sonny has been a disgusting greasy murdering hypocritical self righteous bundle of ew for 20 years and only gts more ew as time passes.

The thing is, no one realizes Derek is old enough to be Carly's father because like any sensible person he got a much younger face when he had his plastic surgery. I miss AJ, and I love RH so much that I can even deal with this implausible storyline (which would have been plausible if he could have come back as ANYONE else) but Sonny just needs to go away.

Derek is suppose to be Sam's father when the two actors are only a few years a apart and it freaking shows on screen! Idiots.

How Kiki did not choke to death on her own hypocracy, I have no idea.

So grateful for my "no robin or AJ, then no GH" watching policy right about now. I get to enjoy robin being back on the show and miss all this crap. I am so disappointed about michaels decent into unlikeability. I so loved him with AJs return and the ELQ shenanigans. But Kiki is the worst thing to happen to that character for years. Writers, get it together.

Where are the Quartermaines? Franco is not a Q nor Jason's brother. I want Tracy, AJ, Monica and Michael's reaction. How are the ELQ votes split now?

can we have Johnny back to make Carly and Olivia remember when they were with an actual hot person who didn't (cause the rape of) rape/shoot their son?

Johnny killed Hope, Cole and Anthony. Wait. Never mind. If the writers can ignore a drunk off his ass Luke killing Jake and continuing to drink on this show, then we can ignore Johnny killing three people. Paging BB!

My thoughts exactly Mallory, couldn't have said it better myself. Just... Ew.

Robert & Annaneed to be front &center now!!

I appreciate your willingness to watch that hot mess. I am now watching Robin days online, and if it isn't a Scorpio/Drake day, I skip it. I am loving it...and oh so happy I don't have to sit through the Franco, Morgan, Kiki, Sonny stuff.

LOL! How awesome is that screenshot of the guy in bacground's head fitting into Carly's hair almost perfectly? Unintentional hilarity.

I need Lauren to stop making faces. It...just doesn't work. Also, I need her to get over Morgan and Ava, when she's banging Morgan's brother.

Olivia and Sonny -- ew, would be correct.

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