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« The Fosters: Truth Be Told | Main | I Have Questions. And Also, Existential Angst »

July 22, 2014

The Fosters: Mother

I gleaned these important things from last night's episode of The Fosters:

- In shocking news, Brandon continues to be the worst. Wyatt was concerned about Callie's freakout last week and goes to Brandon for insight.

Brandon still sucks

After getting very pissy about the fact that Callie is his sister so of course this isn't about unfinished business with him, Brandon immediately snorts that he's already given Wyatt all the help he's going to by "getting out of" Wyatt's way. So is she your sister or not, Brandon? Also, SHE SHUT YOU DOWN. I'm sure she'd really appreciate him going around basically acting like he could have her if he wanted to. Classy. (Yeah, yeah, I'm well aware that Callie and Brandon will still eventually get together, but it doesn't mean I have to like it. And the longer they put it off the grosser it is.)

- They finally got rid of the terrible Mike and Carol separate twin beds! Will the Moms be able to have more than a half-cuddling scene now?!

- Mariana has a date! I like this Mat. I hope his influence convinces her to return to her natural color.

- Lena told Stef about Brandon having smoked pot (but not the "also got statutorily raped" part, mind you). Hilariously, Stef handled it by telling Brandon something about how genetically he's predisposed to having pot freakouts and how he should be really careful and not do that again. Oh and she praised him for having called Lena about it. Oh wait, the hilarious part: then she complained about having to be the hard-ass. HOW IS THAT HARD-ASS? THAT IS THE SOFT-ASS-IEST PARENTING I HAVE EVER WITNESSED. What does she consider non-hard-ass parenting? Actually getting stoned with him in the future?

- Mike is actually helping Ana stay clean. So he didn't kill her. None of it made sense. Also he's thinking of having a kid with his statch-rapey girlfriend. Can't Dani just cross over to Pretty Little Liars and date Ezra? They have a lot in common, though I guess they're decades too old for one another. Since Mystery Girls (which is horrible, but you know, it has Jennie Garth) is the only other ABC Family show I watch, I look forward to their inappropriate relations story. Maybe Tori Spelling's character will have an affair with Jennie Garth's kid? I don't even know. But it's the network's trademark.

- Lena's mother showed up and everyone who watches both this show and Orange Is The New Black got very worried Lena might get slocked.

Don't hurt her vee

Lorraine Toussaint is just ridiculously good all of the time in everything.

- And, the gang got sad news.

Getting sad news is no fun

Baby Frankie wasn't viable. No more baby.  

Despite spelling it out from the opening scene in which Lena dreamed of a perfect child that this was going to happen, and despite a lot of too on-the-nose overly-eloquent schmaltzy dialogue and music telling us how to feel, oops. I got really sad. They played me like a fiddle even though I knew it was happening. (Also, really great performances from the cast.) 

Sad lena lena

Poor Lena.

I'm always of mixed feelings when they write in a pregnancy for a pregnant actress and then have her lose the baby. I understand that (a) it creates drama and (b) it also eliminates the complication of an infant if said infant would hurt the story. And both of those things are true in this case. But what a thing to put an actress through. Not to mention, her character wasn't even showing! So ultimately they never actually had to write it in since they were still masking her baby bump with trays and bags and counters. I'm so glad that Sheri Saum had her healthy twins.

Also, I got really confused about how Lena was talking about how she's the only one not connected by blood in the house and how much she felt like she needed that. Four of the five current kids are adopted! And then I remembered that there are three blood-related pairings and then there's her. Stef/Brandon, Jesus/Mariana, and Callie/Jude. Her mother gave a fantastic speech about how a parent basically has to love a child more than a child loves a parents, but that it's love that makes a family. Theme of the series, etc, etc. But sounds less sappy and more honest when delivered by Lorraine Toussaint.

- Callie told Wyatt the truth about Liam. He told her he can give her whatever space she needs, but that he requests that she's open with him. He also looked a little murder-y, so Liam should steer clear. He might get smothered by Wyatt's hair.

- Jude spoke! Good timing. Lena will need her favorite kid.


Louise, my dear fellow displaced Llanviewite, you are my fave soap blogger but you are being way to hard of my boy B. Why would Wyatt go to him about Callie and expect a productive conversation? There's way too much recent history- it was borderline cruel. I thought B was nice to meet him at all and make sure Callie wasn't in total crisis (because I mean it's Callie) before telling Wyatt they couldn't have this chat. And really, he's right- there would be no Wyatt and Callie if B&C weren't stuck in the adoption predicament. Wyatt knew that back when Stef was shot. And then Brandon was the one who got through to her, got her to open to wyatt, got her to find the words Jude needed to hear. Their convo was ten times more intimate than her talk with Wyatt at the end without even trying to be. Because unlike her boyfriend, he knows how to get through to her and she actually lets him in. I'm just so over desperate Wyatt choosing to be homeless to be near Callie and his Brandon complex and I used to really like him.

I don't know I just see nothing gross about B&C. And it's not the no DNA thing- I would picket outside the studio if he suddenly fell for Mariana. But these two never viewed each other as siblings and they won't ever just because Stef and Lena fell in love with her and came to view her as their child. Stef and Lena are generally so smart and I never got how they just thought they could wave a magic wand and make them feel like brother and sister.

Jude is so Lena's fave you're right! And her second fave is Mariana. And Stef's are Brandon then Callie. Jesus is no one's fave although selling beds was his best plot ever.

I'm evil but delighted about no baby. However as a soap viewer for 20 years, I am deathly afraid about the anvils of Dani and Mike maybe trying to get pregnant and Stef saying something to Brandon about understanding when you have your own kids. Please tell me I'm just overreacting due to the fact that Dani and Brandon would absolutely have a baby if this was Llanview.

Lauren, well, differing mileage makes the world go 'round! Or something. Callie and Brandon won't ever NOT make my skin crawl. But yes, you are absolutely correct that the scenes are written to make us think Brandon and Callie have a forever connection. That's why I hate it! Because of the crawling skin thing.

I'm also delighted about no baby. It was sad, certainly, and I was pretty impressed that they were ballsy enough to make it a health-necessitated abortion rather than the standard miscarriage. But yeah, they did not need a baby in that house.

Oh god, please please please no Dani/Brandon baby. No. No. No!

Color me surprised! I never thought the show would actually have the balls to get rid of that baby. I figured dramatic scary crisis, but it would all work out and there would be "cute" baby hijinx and drama with Timothy, which I was all pre-emptively annoyed about. So I'm pleased.

(Do I sound like a monster? Dead babies are sad.)

Louise, your skin does not crawl alone. Brandon and Brallie are the worst. Stop it, show.

I am also confused about Stef's idea of hard-assness. Every Adams Foster kid but Jude has committed actual crimes and I don't think any of them have even gotten grounded!

Oh the melodrama of this episode. I’m not saying other episodes aren’t heartfelt, but they were more teen-esque rather than Grey’s Anatomy’s overwrought soap operatics (ugh a damn coincidental unicorn? named Frankie).

The only good thing to come from this episode, and it’s because I’m a monster, is that a baby won’t be weaved into the storyline. How was that going to work anyway? They’re having some financial problems, but two educated woman decide to throw a baby in the mix? Were we then going to see hilarious high jinks of the teens babysitting (how annoying)? Most importantly, if it was all for naught (which I had a feeling they weren’t really going to go through with it, either ending it with a miscarriage or an ectopic pregnancy) why create it in the first place, it doesn’t move the plot forward.

Kudos to Sheri Saum she hit me in the feels when she said “they’ll look at me and say ‘You’re not my real mom’ and walk away.” And yes, Lorraine Toussaint nailed the love speech.

At this point I want Callie and Brandon to go away. You’re right Loiuse if they are going to become a thing just do it already, rip the bandage off fast. If they go there (which of course they will because the first person you see I guess is the one you have to bump uglies with) I’m probably out. I’ve said it before but I’ll say it again; parents, especially the ones that want you, are your true constant. Significant others don’t come with a guarantee. Oh well at least I will still get to see Wyatt as Max on Finding Carter.

I don’t know why but I kind of like Dani (minus the predator bit), maybe it’s just that I love Marla Sokoloff. She always plays terrible people: Full House, Freaky Friday (90s edition), plus she makes Brandon miserable (yeah I’m an ass since it’s because of something wrong, but he is so aggravating).

Give Mariana her brunette locks back please and while they’re at it give her that adorable boyfriend with the Alzheimer's mother.

Oh, Melissa I practically said the same thing as you regarding the baby my apologies I really should read the comments before posting.

I hearby absolve all of you of any "evil monster" labels due to being glad a not-real-baby wasn't viable! The baby would have been a terrible addition to the household we've grown to enjoy. If these people were real and you were happy about it, I'd understand why you're all apologizing. But none of you should feel bad for it! I sure don't! So glad, despite it being a nicely-done set of scenes. Doesn't mean I wish she'd had the kid. I don't.

Kate, yes! Alex Saxon is so fun on Finding Carter!!
And yes, I definitely agree that Callie having a family that loves and wants her (for life) should trump her teenage romance every time.

To be fair to Callie, the family has trumped her relationship with Brandon, so there's that. I thought the last conversation that B & C had in front of the hospital was really well done, it not only helped Callie, but it didn't have a romantic-forever vibe, it just had an I-want-to-help-you-because-I-only-want-the-best-for-you vibe. I am not a Brandon fan, but I cheered him on in that moment. Also, notice, there was no Brallieforever hashtag during the scene, which I was also very happy about :)

I don't want to leave Lauren out alone in the cold because I get where she's coming from; I'm just meh about Brallie, but I agree that it was ridiculous for Stef & Lena to think that they could wave a magic wand......when have magic wands ever worked for teenagers? (Harry Potter excluded)
The show introducing that kind of romance in the first place is a whole other story.

I have only now realized the Dani/Brandon baby foreshadowing (thank you, Lauren), and OMG, PLEASE NOOOOOOOOOO!!!

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